I working on "Warcraft - The Musical". The songs write themselves.
  • My horde will go on
  • Alliance sleeps tonight
  • A horde day's night
👍︎ 3
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📅︎ Aug 22 2020
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I visited my friend in jail the other day and there was a jailbreak.

Suddenly there was pandemonium everywhere. The guards on duty ushered us out of the gates just as a horde of inmates began climbing over the barrier wall.

One by one they dropped down disappearing into the brush. Just as I looked up, a midget in an orange jumpsuit stuck his tongue out at me and gave me the finger as he came down.

I thought to myself, "Well that's a little con descending."

👍︎ 22
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📅︎ Apr 23 2019
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Mr. Jones loses his poultry and drove of pigs in a vicious coyote attack one night.

Upon hearing the news, his neighbours and other farm owners decide to chip in to help him through a tough time.

With high hopes and heavy pockets, they reach Mr. Jones' farmhouse, only to see him merrily sipping lemonade on the porch. Confused, a person from the horde asks him, "Aren't you devastated?"

To which the farmer says,

No ham, no fowl

👍︎ 4
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📅︎ Dec 18 2018
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