When I was a kid I thought we’d all grow up to work with horses

All people ever talked about was getting a stable job...

πŸ‘︎ 347
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/the_bradley
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14 2021
🚨︎ report
A man went to the doctor’s and told him, β€œI feel like such a failure. All five of my boys want to be valets when they grow up.”

He said, β€œWow, that’s the worst case of parking son’s disease I’ve ever seen.”

πŸ‘︎ 11k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cyclopropagative
πŸ“…︎ Sep 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you know that crocodiles could grow up to 15 feet?

But most just have 4

πŸ‘︎ 70
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Hud_is_on
πŸ“…︎ Nov 28 2020
🚨︎ report
The youngest girl in our family wants to be a male semiconductor device for amplifying, controlling, and generating electrical signals when she grows up.

She's my trans sister

πŸ‘︎ 46
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2020
🚨︎ report
A saltwater crocodile can grow up to 20 feet...

But most just have 4.

πŸ‘︎ 78
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/The_Invader_Kilz
πŸ“…︎ Sep 20 2020
🚨︎ report
I always had a feeling that my son would grow up to be a pyromaniac.

He always had the burning desire.

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Sep 12 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife told me I needed to grow up, I was speechless.

It’s hard to talk when you have 45 gummy bears stuffed in your mouth

πŸ‘︎ 78
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/NHl20-Fan
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2020
🚨︎ report
I'm sure he'll grow up to liver healthy life
πŸ‘︎ 62
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Random_420-69
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2020
🚨︎ report
I'm sure he'll grow up to liver healthy life.
πŸ‘︎ 17k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Morgan_Redwood
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2018
🚨︎ report
In ~9 moths, there's going to be a baby boom. These babies will be known as "Coronials" and will grow up to become a quaranteen.
πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/gjgav
πŸ“…︎ Apr 08 2020
🚨︎ report
I wish I can be like that parent when I grow up
πŸ‘︎ 7k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Athena123YT
πŸ“…︎ Jul 07 2018
🚨︎ report
Nun: What do you want to be when you grow up?

Billy: A fireman!

Suzie: An accountant!

Jackie: A prostitute!

Nun: WHAT?

Jackie: A prostitute.

Nun: Praise the Lord! I thought you said protestant.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/InterwebWeasel
πŸ“…︎ May 26 2020
🚨︎ report
I love watching dairy products grow up

You get to watch their lives flash pasteurize.

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/irbinator
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2020
🚨︎ report
Kid: Dad, I want to be in politics when I grow up.

Dad: Are you insane? Have you completely lost your mind? Are you a moron?

Kid: Forget it. There seems to be too many requirements.

πŸ‘︎ 10k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2018
🚨︎ report
Me to my 4 year old: "What are you going to be when you grow up?"

My 4 year old: "Older!"

πŸ‘︎ 34
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/texas1st
πŸ“…︎ Jan 29 2020
🚨︎ report
Tree: Hey, Boulder, what do you think I should be when I grow up? Boulder: You would make a wonderful bedroom furniture set.

Tree: Yes. Yes I wood. Thanks Boulder, you rock.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/baconaboot
πŸ“…︎ Feb 20 2020
🚨︎ report
A giraffe can grow up to fifteen feet.

But most only have four.

πŸ‘︎ 22
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/scottymcss
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2019
🚨︎ report
My son said he wants to be a Demolition Man when he grows up.

Should I tell him about the three seashells?

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/CritLuck
πŸ“…︎ Aug 12 2019
🚨︎ report
I read the other day that an American Alligator can grow up to 15 feet!

I was shocked because I’ve never seen one with more than 4!

πŸ‘︎ 52
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/RageMonster17
πŸ“…︎ Feb 20 2019
🚨︎ report
What does Ariana Grande want to be when she grows up?

Ariana Venti

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Twigsnapper
πŸ“…︎ May 27 2019
🚨︎ report
What does an acorn say when it grows up?

Geometry.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Churo547
πŸ“…︎ Sep 26 2019
🚨︎ report
I think my child is going to be a graffiti artist when he grows up.

The writing’s on the wall.

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TF79870
πŸ“…︎ Jun 29 2019
🚨︎ report
Exasperated, I showed him the picture and pleaded, "Doctor, all of my boys want to be valets when they grow up!"

He acknowledged grimly, "Indeed, that's the worst case of parking son's disease that I have ever seen."

πŸ‘︎ 65
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2018
🚨︎ report
Fun fact: Alligators can grow up to 16 feet

But most of them just have 4

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/bluespider89
πŸ“…︎ Jun 21 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you know crocodiles could grow up to 15 feet?

But most just have 4.

πŸ‘︎ 5k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you know that alligators can grow up to 15 feet

But most have 4

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/flippantteacup
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22 2020
🚨︎ report
Alligators can grow up to 15 feet

But most have only four

πŸ‘︎ 7k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/norrisrw
πŸ“…︎ May 29 2019
🚨︎ report
β€œDoc, all five of my sons want to be valets when they grow up!”

Doctor: Holy shit, this is the worst case of parking son’s disease I’ve ever seen!

πŸ‘︎ 47
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jan 18 2020
🚨︎ report
Alligators can grow up to 13 feet.

Most, however, only have 4.

πŸ‘︎ 168
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/doublechen-94
πŸ“…︎ Aug 28 2019
🚨︎ report
Doc, all five of my boys want to be valets when they grow up!

Doc: Wow! That’s the worst case of parking son’s disease I have ever seen.

πŸ‘︎ 21
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/juhaodbrokule
πŸ“…︎ Dec 12 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you know crocodiles can grow up to 15 feet?

But most only have 4 :)

Credit: u/kickypie

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/idkwutimd0ing
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2019
🚨︎ report
Australian crocodiles can grow up to 15 feet!

Most only grow 4.

πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/FrightinglyPunny
πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2019
🚨︎ report
"Doc, all my 5 kids want to be valets when they grow up!"

Doctor: "Wow! That's the worst case of parking son's disease I've ever seen.''

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/simplyGagi
πŸ“…︎ Oct 27 2019
🚨︎ report
I just read that alligators can grow up to 15 feet..

I haven’t seen any with more than 4.

πŸ‘︎ 137
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/sprice-3
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02 2019
🚨︎ report
alligators can grow up to 20 feet

but most grow four

πŸ‘︎ 686
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/buckeyespud
πŸ“…︎ Aug 17 2018
🚨︎ report
Did you know crocodiles could grow up to 15 feet?

But most just have 4.

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2019
🚨︎ report
Some alligators can grow up to 15 feet.

Most only have 4 though.

πŸ‘︎ 158
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/reezeldeezel
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you know crocodiles could grow up to 15 feet?

But most just have 4.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2019
🚨︎ report
β€œI feel like such a failure, doc. All my 5 boys want to be valets when they grow up.”

Doctor: WOW! That’s the worst case of parking son’s disease I’ve ever seen.

πŸ‘︎ 730
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30 2018
🚨︎ report
Did you know crocodiles could grow up to 15 feet?

But most just have 4.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2019
🚨︎ report
Today I learned Alligators can grow up to 15 feet.

Most only have 4

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/xcrunner95
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you know crocodiles could grow up to 15 feet?

But most just have 4.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you know crocodiles can grow up to 15 feet?

But most of then just have 4.

πŸ‘︎ 112
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Datboifritz113
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you know alligators can grow up to 19 feet

But most have 4

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/iknowthisischeesy
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2019
🚨︎ report
Alligators can grow up to 20 feet...

But most only grow 4.

πŸ‘︎ 251
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Talquin
πŸ“…︎ Sep 13 2018
🚨︎ report
Giraffes can grow up to 18 feet

But most only grow 4

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Elrond_Halfelven
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2019
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.