Hey Have mother in laws 50th birthday coming up. We are getting T-Shirts made up and we want to have T-Shirts made up for the guests and one made up for the mother in law. Her name is Jo King.
We are having thoughts on
She is turning 50? You gotta be JoKing for the guest T-Shirt
I’m Jo King and I’m turning 50 for the mother in law shirt.
Any better ideas then this?
"Ayyyy!"
"B!"
"See?"
You will get this one tomorrow
Because you're not supposed to stick the whole thing in you mouth at once.
While packing after our family camp reunion, my father invites his sister, obviously my aunt, to come eat lunch with us at av restaurant on the way home.
Aunt: Oh no thanks! [husband] and I went to Wendy's on our way here!
Dad: oh nice!... How is she doing?
There was much Groaning.
It's a gag reflex
She gagged.
I hope it doesn't become a running gag
It's a gag reflex
There I saw a joke participating in the marathon.
I told my friend," I didn't know jokes could run" He said," Its a running gag"
Because they love a good gag.
(My son's favorite joke when he was about 10)
It's a running gag.
It’s more of a gag gift.
It's a running gag
It was a running gag.
She gagged
Not only that, but its also terrible.
The Japanese are just loli-gagging.
I asked him what he meant by that.
He said "It prevents you from streaking."
I have to admit I actually genuinely laughed at that one.
It's a running gag.
...do they suffer from "arf"-ritis?
Please post expired dad jokes here. My Dad expired in 2002 and I want his Dad jokes to live on. Here's one: "I need an aspirin." Dad: "Go sit on the stove." There are dozens of worse ones I'm going to recollect and post on this sub for the rest of my life. E.g., "What's the movie about?" Dad: "two hours." Needless to say, my family is suffering and will continue to suffer, thanks to my Dad.
It’s a gag gift
Dada Mole pokes his nose out of the mole hole, sniffs the air, and licks his lips. “Mmm, someone nearby is baking.” he says. “I smell butter.”
Mama Mole comes up next and sniffs the air. Her eyes light up. "Yes, someone is baking,” she says. “I smell sugar!”
Brother Mole is next. “Mmm, maybe some chocolate!” he exclaims as he does a little dance.
Little Baby Mole is last. He sniffs the air, gags and nearly chokes as he says “All I smell is molasses.”
So, me and my group of friends recently started a gag going on one of our friends. She rolls with it, so it's okay.
So we just mess around with puns like "You're the bomb", "You've got an explosive personality", any bomb or explosion reference/pun we can make when talking with her or about her basically.
However, we are running out of puns.
Anyone got suggestions ?
I was buying Goat Simulator as a gag gift for a friend. The cashier looks at it and I smile uncomfortably. He says, "Don't be sheepish about buying this".
[Driving past the cemetery] Me: Hey kids, you know how many dead people are buried in that cemetery?
kids: Uhhhhhh. . . .
Me: All of 'em.
Backstory: My grandfather would always do this gag when I was a kid and it was YEARS before I understood it. I'd think, "how could all the dead people in the world be buried in there?" Then one day it all made sense, and I did laugh.
Christina Aguilera and her boyfriend were in college. Now, Christina likes men with lots of testosterone, and her boyfriend was no exception, but the downside was, he was already losing his hair. "I would do something about it," he'd say, "but I don't know how much it would cost." One weekend they went to a student fair, and one of the campus groups was holding a couples' spelling contest. They were offering all kinds of gag items as prizes; condoms, jock straps, training bras, that sort of thing. The top prize for the winning guy was a hairpiece, valued at $100. So Christina helpfully suggested to her boyfriend, "If you won a bee with me, baby, there's a priced toupée!"
I call it my gag reflex.
We were watching the movie and she says "this movie isn't going anywhere", and I sit for a moment before replying, "yeah, 80's comedies were mostly a string of gags" pause for dramatic effect, "coincidentally, so were 80's pornos!"
I proceed to laugh at that for 2 minutes while she roles to her side and ignores me.
It's their gag reflex
She gagged.
She gagged
She gagged.
