Andy was frustrated.
His wife always complained that he wasn't good enough in bed and that she wasn't satisfied.
He went to the local bar to get a drink and cool off for a bit. On reaching the bar, he ordered a beer and sat down.
His friend, Mike saw him sitting alone and walked up to him.
He asked Andy what happened to which Andy told him the situation. Mike said that he had a simple trick which never failed and told Andy to hit his meat on the bedpost three times before sex.
Andy rushed home to perform this trick.
He saw that his wife was lying on the bed with the lights off. Slowly he took off his pants and hit his meat three times on the bedpost. Dum, dum, dum.
His wife immediately woke up and shouted, "Mike, is that you?"
How did the frustrated husband decorate the christmas tree?
Why was the horny dinosaur frustrated?
Because the triceratops didn't have a tricerabottom.
Why is it wrong to punch the wall when you’re frustrated?
The wall has never been anything but supportive.
I bought a complete set of kitchen utensils off an infomercial. I was frustrated that there was nothing to mix my eggs...
...but to be fair, they did say it was whisk-free offer.
Son was getting frustrated about the pandemic shutdown
Son : “We need the opposite of shut down! Dad, what’s the opposite of shut down?”
Dad : “Shut up!”
What is a frustrated mother’s favorite month?
I set the comp password to ‘Homework1st’ my daughter was getting frustrated...
I set the comp password to ‘Homework1st’ my daughter was getting frustrated that every time she asked what I changed it to, I answered. She did every piece of work, including corrections. Then I wrote it down.
When does a doctor become frustrated?
When they run out of patients
I'm frustrated with not being able to finish all of my cereal
I think I have irritable bowl syndrome
I was washing the dishes today and got so frustrated I screamed into a collander.
I think I strained my voice.
Lately my wife has become increasingly frustrated with the amount of geriatric patients she’s been seeing...
My grandfather is really frustrated that he has to take the stair chair lift because of his age.
It’s driving him up the wall.
An orange went to a party to find a date but couldn’t find one.. frustrated, she said
Where did all the....Mango
I’m a failing, frustrated Doctor trying to decide if I should retire.
I just don’t have the patients...
My wife gets so frustrated with my sense of direction...
... that I finally packed up my stuff and right.
Henry Heimlich, the creator of the Heimlich maneuver, was getting frustrated. (Crosspost from /r/jokes)
reddit.com/r/Jokes/commen…
He was violently frustrated to find that his sailboat had drifted a great many miles off course overnight
He needed to work on his anchor management
Why was the man frustrated at the ballpoint pens sorted in columns?
Because he preferred things arranged by row.
My wife and I were stuck in traffic for a long time. Frustrated, I looked at her and said, “I’m turning round.”
She said, “I know. Stop eating so much bacon.”
This kid in my shop class got so frustrated, he threw down his saw and stormed out.
Poor guy just couldn’t cope.
What did the frustrated surgeon say?
This guy is so full of himself
My boyfriend got frustrated while I was trying to choose a pair of shoes...
Him: "just pick any pair. It's not like they have feelings"
Me: "But they do have soles!!"
We both groaned.
What did the frustrated doctor say to the nurse?
Why are paediatricians always so frustrated?
Because they have little patients
After weeks of looking for a well-rounded Mexican actor for his next movie, Guillermo Del Toro was frustrated.
Oh well, Back to square Juan.
A Frenchman was frustrated after digging a deep hole only to have it fill with water.
"Eau well!" he exclaimed.
My dad and I were installing ductwork in our basement and he was getting really really frustrated about something.
I asked him if everything was ok, he looks at me and says:
"I just need a vent"
Friend texted me, frustrated that he had spilled his salad down his shirt.
"Oh darn, I'm sorry to hear that you're having trouble dressing yourself."
The frustrated cannibal threw up his hands.
My Dad, being particularly frustrated with my Mom one evening, turned to me and said..."You know why they call it PMS?...
...because Mad Cow was already taken."
Daughter was frustrated with me and said "Dad, give me a straight answer!"
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