Pun Request: Foot
I need to write a bit about "digital footprints" for a class.
I figured I should throw a few foot puns in to spice things up.
However, soon I found that trouble was afoot.
I'm starting to run dry and am close to being dead on my feet.
Can I get a few extra hands (and feet) to throw in some ideas?
Toe/heel/knee puns also welcome.
What is a foot long and slippery?
What did the chemist say when he dropped a bar of gold on his foot?
What has five toes but isn't your foot?
My foot.
Edit: Thanks a lot guys for the awards and upvotes. ;) :)
So... there was a nose measuring contest. There were some really long ones like 10 inches. But Fred had the longest at 12 inches. The judge didn’t like that. It’s not a nose then is it... it’s a foot.
My son accidentally smashed his foot on the table and as he was hopping around the room screaming in pain, I rushed to the phone, picked it up and asked him, "Do you want me to call..."
We had a foot of snow outside today.
I don’t know who made it or who put it there, but the craftsmanship is amazing.
What’s the best way to transport a giant foot?
A tub of margarine fell on my foot 3 weeks a go and it still hurts.....
I can't believe it's not better.
When my grandparents came over they said: “You look like you’ve grown a foot!”
I looked down to my feet, looked back up, and told them: “No, I still have just two.”
I lost a few digits recently when something heavy dropped on my foot. Today I got prosthetics for them.
Comment below if you’d like to see photos of my faux toes.
I bought a 3 foot ruler this summer...
What was everyone saying about the photographer who got the prosthetic foot?
They got some new faux-toes
What foot dont they make shoes for?
Why did the foot stink at telling jokes?
Going to the foot doctor tomorrow.
Don't often think about my feet. They are usually the furthest thing from my mind.
What has 5 toes, but isn’t your foot?
Authorities are searching for a four-foot tall woman who recently escaped from prison in upstate New York. She was serving a five year sentence for fraud after convincing a number of victims that she was a powerful psychic.
Now she's a small medium at large.
I'm 6 foot 6 inches (~196cm) and I recently found the cause for my back problems.
Almost everyone looks up to me. Being a role model to that many people is a lot of weight for one to carry on their shoulders.
What is made of leather, a foot long and sounds like a sneeze?
Foot massages,
they're good for the sole.
Why was the Monarch only one foot tall?
My wife looked at my son (7) yesterday and told him his shoes were on the wrong feet
Without missing a beat he said "They can't be, these are the only feet I have"
Proud dad moment!
I thought I was being very clever but I’ve been known to put my foot in my mouth.
Those people who refuse to date foot amputees?
They are lack toes intolerant.
Big Foot has been spotted throwing tantrums and talking back to his parents.
No wonder they call him the Sassquatch.
Why do foot fetishist never win?
Because they love the taste of defeet.
Today i learned about foot fungus
Talk about tripping on shrooms!
What do you say when your sister steps on your foot and breaks your toe in half?
A guy got his foot stuck in a vat of milk.
I woke up at midnight to find the ghost of Gloria Gaynor staring at me from the foot of my bed...
First I was afraid, I was petrified.
What do you call a sneezing big foot in Spanish?
I accidentally cut off most of my foot
I've invented a sandal for one legged people...
What did the cell say to the other cell who stepped on its foot?
Earlier, I was driving behind an ambulance when a cooler fell off the back. I stopped and opened it up to find a foot inside..
So I decided to call a toe-truck.
I cut my foot whilst chopping wood
It was an axeident waiting to happen
What's the hardest foot to buy a shoe for?
It's the opposite day and my friend challenges me in tic tac toe. when it's his turn, he grabs the pencil by his foot. I ask him why and he responds:
"I'm playing the toe tactic"
I think the front of my foot has gone dead-asleep.
Now they are a bunch of coma-toes.
I had a girlfriend in high school that I dumped when I found out she was missing a toe on her left foot...
I guess that makes me lack-toes intolerant.
My son accidentally smashed his foot on the table and as he was hopping around the room screaming in pain, I rushed to the phone, picked it up and asked him, "Do you want me to call..."
A tub of margarine fell on my foot three weeks ago and it still hurts.
I can’t believe it’s not better.
A tub of margarine fell on my Foot last week
And it's still bruised, I can't believe it's not better.
What did the chemist say when he dropped a bar of gold on his foot?
Whats a foot long and slippery?
What has 5 toes but isn’t your foot?
Why is the king only one foot tall?
What has 5 toes but isn’t your foot
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.
