I feel bad for fizzy drink bottles
Their life is soda pressing.
I feel kinda stupid and kinda proud for coming up with this (drawing on a phone is hard)
I feel bad for pet rocks sometimes....
Why do people take rocks for granited?
I just hope mine doesn't dieorite.
I feel sorry for girls in wheelchairs
Their boyfriends are always pushing them around and talking behind their backs.
I feel like if my family and friends were selecting the epitaph for my tombstone they would go with "He meant well."
Especially if my last words were "Help! I fell in the wall!"
I feel sorry for my math teacher.
He’s always looking for his x, and when he isn’t he’s asking y.
As a single dad money can be tight. But even when I’m on a date and I know I’m not attracted to her, I still like to get the door for her and let her walk through. It makes her feel appreciated.
And it makes it easier to slam the door and run so I don’t have to pay for dinner.
I feel so bad for the floor..
Everyone just walks all over it
I listened to Queen albums for 12 hours in a row, and now I feel a little sick.
It must be the high Mercury content.
If you're having voice problems I feel bad for you son,
I've got 99 problems but a pitch ain't one
I feel sorry for basketball players who can't go on vacation
Because they can't Travel.
I feel bad for children of gay parents
They either suffer twice as many dad jokes or an endless cycle of “ask your mother”.
I do really feel bad for the Class of 2020. People say your senior year flys..
I just didn’t realize it would Zoom..
I feel really bad for cucumber seeds...
If they're unlucky, they could really get themselves in a pickle.
I feel sad for those who have a prosthetic arm.
Because they lack a humerus bone in their body.
As an Aussie, I feel sorry for my American friends and their government
After all, they’re still stuck in the last decade
I feel bad for toilet paper
I feel a bit bad for making blanket statements.....
They're my quilty pleasure
I feel bad for kids with trans parents
I feel bad for geologists,
People always take them for granite.
And I feel bad for tortillas too,
They always get a bad wrap.
I feel sorry for New Yorkers right now because of the high number of Corona infected people. Hopefully they're the last to get it. Unfortunate for China though
They got it right off the bat
How did the dagger feel after exercising for the first time in a long while?
You’ve got to feel sorry for Philip Schofield
Only just come out and now he is being told he has to stay in.
In a way, I kind of feel bad for the corona virus.
At my age, I remember how deflating it was to spend hours and hours coming up with an email address or gamer tag that was both clever and fun, only to find out that 18 others had thought of it first
How did Chris Hemsworth feel after he started working out for the new Avengers movie?
Where should you go for a drink when you feel under pressure?
I feel nothing but shame for making this.
Whenever I feel ill, I look for a cure
Do you ever feel bad for looking down on people in wheelchairs?
I feel bad for the guy laughing in the operating room
He is in stitches as we speak.
I feel sorry for single socks
They’ve lost their sole mate
I feel sorry for shopping carts!
They're always getting pushed around!
I feel bad for deep sea fish..
They have a lot of pressure on them.
Should I feel bad for making this in Paint 3D?
Here's TWO-FER. A little long for a Dad joke, but I do feel they fit the "Zone"
A man is on his first visit to Boston, and he wants to try some of that delicious New England seafood that he'd long heard about. So he gets into a cab, and asks the driver, "Can you take me to where I can get scrod?" The driver replies, "I've heard that question a thousand times but never in the pluperfect subjunctive."
An Irishman goes to a building site for his first day of work, and a couple of Englishmen think, "Ah, we'll have some fun with him!" So they walk up and say, "Hey, Paddy, as you're new here make sure you know a joist from a girder..." "Ah, sure, I knows" says Paddy, "twas Joyce wrote Ulysses and Goethe wrote Faust."
I have been constipated for a week, but I feel fine.
But then again, I could be full of shit.
I feel sorry for the blind prostitute
I feel bad for anyone with the name Matt.
People are always walking all over Matt's.
After waiting in line for what felt like an eternity, I started to feel like a bad doctor.
I just kept losing my patience.
Ya know, I feel bad for plungers
They’ve been through a lot of shit.
Sometimes I feel like a doctor for dwarves...
Because I have such little patience.
My wrist feels like an underground road for vehicles with multiple passengers.
I think I have carpool tunnel syndrome.
I found out that I was pregnant because when I went to the OB, the doctor told me to put me feet in the stirrups. My husband blurted “That is the strangest horse I’ve ever seen!” The doctor smiled and congratulated my husband for making his first dad joke. His response “I feel a little Dad inside.”
I feel for Late.
He's always apologising for who he is.
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