If we wanted evangelical Christians to take the pandemic as a serious threat...

... we should have called it the Quran-o-virus.

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👤︎ u/ballpressure
📅︎ Oct 18 2020
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How many evangelicals does it take to change a lightbulb?

It takes 12. 11 to pray over the bulb and 1 to cast out the darkness.

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👤︎ u/rasberryjam5151
📅︎ Nov 05 2019
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Traveling Evangelical Geese...

My morning walk with the dog was cut short today. There's a park we usually wander through so she can sniff and explore, but today we couldn't get in because the path was blocked by an army of angry geese.

I was telling my mom about this and she mentioned there are geese at the river where she and a friend take their dogs, too. She said they must all be in town for some kind of conference. Then she paused for half a second and continued:

I bet it's a religious thing. They're here to preach the goosepel.

(To satisfy the rule: that's a play on gospel.)

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👤︎ u/PupperPuppet
📅︎ Aug 12 2019
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