It was hoppenstance
Eggwhite
I didn't want to hear another Peep out of him.
Easter and Valentine's Day are a couple other good cand-y-dates.
I said, "no thanks. I'll Paas."
"An end to religious brainwashing."
"When do we want it?"
"After Easter."
Anyone know where I can find rolling papers big enough to fit one?
My gf is trying to get as many puns as possible with both in one. Anyone can think of some?
For efficiency, send your kids to look for eggs that you haven’t hidden.
Replace the T with an I
we have Wester
....I am turning my house into a Chinese restaurant.
A box of Kleenex
It sorts by new.
Couldn't get a Peep out of him.
I re-Lent-ed
Because he was a little chicken.
Son: I know Mum already told me. She also said that uncle Mike is the stork.
"Her invisible jet."
It was time for his annual eggzam.
Hop Scotch
Eggs marks the spot
It was a party mostly with parents and their children.
A kid (about 5 years old) stubbed his toe and started crying.
One of the dads said, “Oh, you stubbed your toe? Want to to call the toe truck?”
I know it’s not fresh, but I laughed my ass off and was slightly bitter that I didn’t think of it.
Me: "Sure! You can do an Easter-egg hunt every single day"
^^^You ^^^probably ^^^won't ^^^find ^^^any ^^^though.
A couple of nights ago my girlfriend and I spotted a white jackrabbit in the field near our house. We noticed one again tonight on our drive home:
Girlfriend: Hey look, it's the Easter bunny.
Me: Huh, pretty sure that's the same jackrabbit from the other night.
Girlfriend: Can't be a jackrabbit, its ears are way too small.
Me: We're clearly just splitting hares here, babe.
It took a second, but she responded with the desired groan and the "you're an idiot" face push-away. Victory.
Stopping his car he got out to check if it was okay.
In a stroke of good fortune the rabbit was still alive, just.
The man went into the church to see if there was anyone who could help him.
A kindly Priest saw the man and offered to help. He asked the Mab to wait a moment while he got something that might help...
... After a few moments the Priest returned with a small flask and poured the contents on the rabbit. Which hopped up right as rain!
The rabbit waved to the man, and crossed the road.
After crossing the road the rabbit turned around an waved again. After a few hops the rabbit turned around and waved again. This continued until the man could no longer see the rabbit. A few hops, turn and wave.
When the man turned back to the kindly Priest and asked him, "What was in that bottle anyway, Holy water?"
The Priest replied, "oh nothing like that. It was haer restore, with a permanent wave."
Lots of eggs-ercise!
He kept quacking all the eggs.
I told him he made an Egg-finity omelette.
Swap out the 't' for an 'i'
He was eggspelled.
