It left it's tracks!
Doesn’t he know cow tipping is illegal?
What with all this talk of car-owner virus
"Hi! I'd like to place an order to go."
"That's the last place I want to go."
Dad: do you know how many people are dead in there?
All of them.
"I hear people are dying to get into that place."
"Wow! People must be dying to get in there."
Or
DAD: "What did one dead person say to another?"
ME: "What?"
DAD: "....................................."
ME: "Seriously, what did he say?"
DAD: "......................................"
ME: "OHHHHHHHH, I get it."
"People are dying to get in there!"
Dad: "Wow that graveyard is packed, do you know why it's so crowded?" "I heard people are dying to go there."
"That's the dead centre of [wherever we are], that is!" `
I told her to chai harder.
a Yard Sale.
Dad: "Who would sell just the yard, what about the house?"
a Garage Sale.
Dad: "Where are they going to park their cars then?"
"What the... are you driving by braille or something?
Dad: What do you call a cow with no legs.........!!!???!!
Everyone in the car:........wwhuut?
Dad: GROUND BEEF
Everyone:...........................ha!
We're from NJ (he's been here his entire life). That part of the turnpike is how we get our bad name (smells, industrial, crime).
Every single time we drive through Elizabeth he proclaims, WHO'S ELIZABETH AND WHY SHE SMELL SO BAD?! followed by many self induced chuckles.
"I'm sorry about your wait, go ahead with your order."
"No problem, I've been trying to cut back a little!"
...I turn to my wife and ask, "do you think they sell napkins there?"
Dad: man, people are dying to get in there
...
Dad: "Do you know how many people are dead in there?"
Me: "No, how many?"
Dad: "All of them."
