Doled out a Dad joke whilst at work in a hotel kitchen.

I'm a kitchen hand, and we take these big containers the chefs fill with dirty pans etc to clean the contents. These containers are called warwicks (pronounced "WORRICK").

I took one of these warwicks, and the chef next to me thanked me. As a response to his thank you, I just said "hey mate, no warwicks!"

Chef turned to look at me in disappointment, and almost dropped a pan of garlic prawns.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RevenantCommunity
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2014
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Grrrrr... I've just burnt my Hawaiin pizza....

Should have cooked it on aloha heat.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 09 2020
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I know a lot of jokes about unemployment

The only thing is none of them work

πŸ‘︎ 81
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πŸ‘€︎ u/c_84
πŸ“…︎ Jul 18 2020
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Did you hear about the Dole truck that crashed?

It was speeding down the interstate going 20 over the speed limit with a bunch of monkeys hanging off the side when suddenly it lost control and crashed, spilling the contents of it's trailer across all four lanes blocking traffic for hours.

It was bananas.

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πŸ“…︎ Aug 20 2018
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As part of my community service, I had to hand out cans of pineapple to needy families...

I Doled it out.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jun 25 2020
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When you are on welfare in Hawaii, you get free pineapple.

It's called being on the dole.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ycarusbog
πŸ“…︎ Apr 12 2020
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Diapers

Diapers come in sizes that are rated according to the baby's weight i.e. "up to 12 lbs". Every time my dad (grandpa to my kids) sees a pack of diapers he says " I don't think they'll hold that much ". Every. Single. Time.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/emjayt
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2013
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I got my family yesterday on Father's day while eating pineapple sorbet.

We were at Disney marveling at the amount of pineapple sorbet they serve you (for $5, that is) when I said:

"Man, they just Dole it out, don't they?"

My brother just stared at me.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SuitGuySmitti
πŸ“…︎ Jun 22 2015
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My dad this morning

Everybody was sitting quietly at the breakfast table this morning and my dad decided to break the silence with this.

Dad: This orange juice tastes funny...

Mom: What does it taste like?

Dad: I don't know, but it has a dole flavor.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/like_and_umm
πŸ“…︎ Dec 12 2013
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