How do you dehydrate your grapes faster?

By raisin the roof

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👤︎ u/aparks1437
📅︎ May 08 2019
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A man is found dead in the desert. Cause of death appeared to be dehydration. The police go to his mother's house.

"Ma'am you son dried "

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📅︎ Dec 16 2020
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My twins give me chills, dehydration, fatigue, fever, loss of appetite, and extreme diarrhea.

Their names are Sam and Ella.

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👤︎ u/Anddditburns
📅︎ Dec 10 2020
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Once I was so dehydrated, I couldn’t even remember all the letters in the English alphabet.

I went ABCDEFG and then PQRSTUVWXYZ. I was missing H to O.

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👤︎ u/keychainoi
📅︎ Oct 05 2020
🚨︎ report
What did one dehydrated French poodle say to the other?

"What am I supposed to do, Pierre?"

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👤︎ u/thumbtackthief
📅︎ Aug 30 2020
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Asian martial arts must be very dehydrating...

because every second line in a movie is "Wataaah!".

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👤︎ u/Trandami
📅︎ Sep 11 2019
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What did the snails doctor give them for dehydration?

A snailine solution!

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👤︎ u/snowierstorm
📅︎ Jan 04 2020
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My tongue swelled up after eating dehydrated patella

The doctor said it was a knee jerk reaction

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👤︎ u/hotsprings1234
📅︎ Nov 04 2019
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Recent study shows leading cause of dehydration in children:

Bedtime

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👤︎ u/SarcasticaFont
📅︎ Mar 19 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did all the animals die of dehydration?

because of the water hogs.

👍︎ 9
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👤︎ u/flickrfrog
📅︎ Mar 08 2019
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What do you call a dehydrated French man?

Pee air

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👤︎ u/Mrkzmn7pnt62
📅︎ Feb 27 2018
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What do you call a dehydrated Frenchman?

Pierre

👍︎ 9
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👤︎ u/SoDakZak
📅︎ Jul 18 2017
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Why are ghosts always dehydrated?

They have a lot of boos but no water

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👤︎ u/conleyc
📅︎ Sep 17 2015
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Just installed a new hydration system

It was well done

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👤︎ u/BrutusMaximu
📅︎ Jan 02 2020
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What do hydras fear the most?

Dehydration!

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👤︎ u/Rivethart
📅︎ Feb 12 2020
🚨︎ report
What happens to cowboys when they get food poisoning?

They get dire yee-haw.

Source: I have food poisoning and am dying. The dehydration has led my mind to some cowboy related place I guess. Also dire hee-haw works better but I don't know anything about what cowboys say.

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👤︎ u/Lightxspeed
📅︎ Dec 27 2019
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What was the Hydra's greatest fear...

... Dehydration

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👤︎ u/stgm_at
📅︎ Jul 02 2018
🚨︎ report
What do you call a Roman with a cold?

Julius Sneezar

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👤︎ u/gett-itt
📅︎ Feb 23 2017
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Son got me good yesterday morning

Yesterday morning at 10am my kids came to wake me up for family day. I'd worked late the night before and I was pretty groggy and completely dehydrated.

Son: "Time to get up dad!"

Me: "I'll get up, but could you go grab my water bottle and put some cold water in it?"

(2 minutes pass while his sister jumps on my head)

Son (with special grin on his face): "Here you go, Dad."

(I take the bottle and cautiously take a sip. I get a little dribble of water and realize the whole thing is full of ice.)

Me: ...

Son: You asked for cold water, you didn't specify how cold.

Me: ...that's my boy.

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👤︎ u/quackdamnyou
📅︎ Sep 19 2016
🚨︎ report
Watermelon

Friend: I've been having lots of dehydrated fruits lately. Did you know they make dehydrated watermelons?

Me: Does that mean it becomes just melons?

Friend: -.-

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👤︎ u/kittyPowersupply
📅︎ May 06 2014
🚨︎ report

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