A list of puns related to "Conventionality"
That has left scientists scratching their heads.
It was a blast!
They told him that he was missing attire
Turns out they're mediums.
The security guard suspected I was not the Real McCoy.
Linkin Park's "Breaking the Habit."
I think it was "Much UwU About Nothing"
Because nun of them are in it for the money.
And boy are my arms tires
I told them βNein, out of tin.β Dentists agreed.
Due to unforeseen circumstances
They call it the Enter prize
She said she would not tolerate such nun scents.
A SIMPosium!
(Not here to hate on simps just a pun i thought of)
They were the wurst people.
Times Square!
But they canβt do it without your con scent
The quality is excellent, but the serving size is only 0.2 grams
My dad used to tell me this one growing up:
>Native American child is with his father. He looks up at him and says "Dad, how did you figure out what to name us when we were born?"
>
>The dad responds "Son, it's easy: I just looked around nature and what I saw is what I named you. Your sister, Flying-Eagle, for instance, was born while an eagle flew overhead. Your brother was named Roaming-Buffalo for a similar reason. Why do you ask, Two-Dogs-Fucking?"
He was the Key Note speaker!
βSo you havenβt tried turning on a light then?β
To get a tight seal
Trevor loved tractors. And I mean, really loved tractors. Forget any obsessions or high-level interests you may have, chances are they pale in the face of Trevorβs love for tractors.
Every day Trevor would get up, in his tractor-themed bedroom in his tractor-themed house, with its tractor-themed wallpaper and tractor-themed carpets, and he would make his bed with its tractor-themed duvet and tractor-themed sheets. He would go downstairs in his tractor-themed pajamas into his tractor-themed kitchen, with its tractor-themed tiles and cupboards, and he would eat his breakfast while perusing the latest tractor-themed magazine or annual.
Trevorsβs degree in Agricultural Engineering hung on his living room wall, along with a copy of his thesis, which centred around (you guessed it) tractors. The living room was decorated with all sorts of tractor-related trinkets, including die-cast models, paintings and drawings.
The hedges in Trevorβs front garden were trimmed in the shape of tractors. His lawn was vividly decorated with tractor-driving garden gnomes, and his garden furniture was constructed from various parts from vintage tractor designs.
Trevor just had one thing missing from his otherwise tractor-centric life; he had never actually owned, nor driven, a real tractor.
Not for his lack of trying, of course. Trevor had been to many tractor shows over the years, and visited many farms with friends of his, but none of the tractors he had seen had ever been quite right. Trevor was so knowledgeable about tractors that every single one he had come across had possessed some hidden trait that he wasnβt keen on. His first experience of driving a real tractor had to be perfect.
One day, Trevor was flicking through one of his favourite publications, Powertrain Quarterly, when there was a knock at the door. Trevor answered, and it was his friend and fellow tractor enthusiast, Jeff.
Trevor welcomed Jeff in, and over tea and crumpets served on tractor-themed crockery, they discussed the merits of aluminium drawbars and front-end loaders. Eventually Trevor pressed Jeff to explain the reason for his visit.
βWellβ said Jeff, βAs Iβm sure you know the convention comes to town laterβ.
The convention. Trevor had been thinking of little else the past three weeks. The neighbouring town annually threw a convention for farmers, particularly farmyard machinery. There would be combine harvesters, lawnmowers, and of course, tractors.
βYes of courseβ replied Trevor
... keep reading on reddit β‘It's my exposition exposition ex-position.
That left scientists scratching their heads.
I might go if I've got nothing on.
Over 2,000 gingers showed up and there wasn't a sole to be seen.
No fence. Nun taken.
Nun
Apparently donuts wasn't what they meant.
Thankfully no one showed up.
Because of the freebees.
Maintain-nuns.
I was surprised to see the number of people in the quwue
I laughed more than I thought.
A blue tooth speaker.
Unpresidented.
I was looking for love in Alderaan places!
It promises to be as big as the last two put together!
Seeing all that metal destroyed, it was just soda pressing.
I was expecting to be unique but there were a lot of Chewbaccas. Guess that was a Wookie mistake.
It was called Yeet and greet.
A meat and greet.
"They say it escalated quickly."
"We'll ketchup later but first I mus-turd!"
Thankfully, it didn't raise any eyebrows
Truly, brewed tea was in the eye of the bee-holder.
Fortunately, it didnβt raise any eye brows
A young man worked at a carpet selling business and one day his boss came up to him and said:
"We have been impressed with how you sell the products. We're going to send you to a carpeting convention in Las Vegas so you can learn all the tricks of the trade. We will pay for your flights, accommodation, and all your food!"
The young man was excited and went and got ready for his trip. The day of the trip came and the young man's boss called and asked him if he was excited for his adventure to which the young man replied:
"Yes I am! I'm gonna seize the day because I've got a carpet per diem"
There was nobody there.
It ended up being the pits
No, but it serves her rite.
It was a wookie mistake.
SillyCon Valley
They approach a table displaying a wide assortment of rocks. The chemist points in the booth's direction and asks the miner, "Which is your favorite; cinnabar or cassiterite?" The miner thought for a moment and replied, "Either ore."
I'll see myself out.
I see dad people.
She had con-troll issues.
Because it's con-etiquette
... It is going to be rough. (Yes he actually is going, and it is a real thing)
I hated the talks because the speakers there were using so many buzzwords.
Trumppence a bag.
there wasn't a dry eye in the house.
Everyone else thought his opinions were irrelephant.
Because you can't C in the dark
I was filling flowerbeds at work-a sport center and gym- with my dad(one of the owners), the groundskeeper- a father himself(lets call him GK), his son, and another co-worker.
two brothers, both in their late teens come out of the gym and wait for their dad to come pick them up. My dad sees them and asks if they want to help with the mulch- "its a free second workout!" A little later, GK says "Hey guys, you two should help with the mulch. We won't pay ya, but it'll help build up your muscles!". After the second time, you could hear the kids groan across the parking lot.
Aaand in come the brothers' father to pick them up. "Hey, look- they're mulching. you should help them. you two need to work on your biceps."
Three variants of the same dad joke in a matter of 15 minutes.
There was Charlie everywhere. (sorry)
an Auntie social.
you can buy them from a boot sale at a convent.
A couple years ago, I was walking with my dad and we noticed there were a lot of midgets/dwarves/little people (I don't know which is politically correct) walking in the same direction. Not three feet in front of us, there is a midget couple walking in front and my dad turns to me and "whispers":
I wonder what they wanna be when they grow up.
It should be called "Wouldstalk."
Friend: "Awesome guest announcement for a Melbourne convention. He voiced Mojo Jojo in the Powerpuff Girls and Ghostface"
Me: "I have no idea who or what Ghostface is"
Friend: "Scream"
Me: "I did, and I still have no idea who Ghostface is"
Every year, the team was in the state championship game, and usually won it handily. Every able lad within a few hundred miles wanted to play football for Central Catholic Fighting Knights.
Those who were familiar with the program, knew that the true heart and soul of the Knights football program was Sister Mary Margaret, an aged nun who would, in full habit, get out on the practice field and work on routes with the receivers, give pointers to the quarterbacks on their stances and releases, but most of all, love them like the second mother that she became to all of the boys in that program.
One year, on the eve of the state championship game, some evil malefactors broke into the convent and kidnapped Sister Mary Margaret. Everyone was stunned by the news, but none more so than the Knights of Central Catholic. They were devastated at the loss of their mentor.
As you might guess, the state championship game didn't go very well. For the first time in the history of the football program, the Knights were shut out. The Spartans beat them 42-0.
The next day, the headline on the local sports section read:
No Offense, Nun Taken
It has left scientists scratching their heads.
That has left scientists scratching their heads.
This has left scientists scratching their heads.
Security soon twigged I wasn't the real McCoy
That has left scientists scratching their heads.
And boy are my arms tires.
It was quite a spectacle
The Security guard suspected I was not the real McCoy..
Laughed more than I thought.
It will be as big as the last two put together.
Boy are my arms tires.
Just seen that there's a nudist convention on in town next week...
Might go if I've got nothing on
but it costs an arm and a leg to get in.
Times Square!
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