Today I'm putting a cockroach in the bathroom
But he missed it by about a foot.
They had a blast
I said, “I don’t see myself doing that.”
Because they are insects, it's a feature...not a bug.
If you pick one up and yell "RUN !" at it and then put it down, it'll run away. But if you take it's legs off and yell "RUN !", it'll just sit there.
If a cockroach has sex with its sister, is it considered infest?
Arnold: I’m not a terminator anymore, I’m retired
Me: But my house is filled with cockroaches & rats, please help!!!
Arnold: How‘s that my concern?
Me: If you’re retired doesn’t that make you an exterminator?
There once was a man from the Ukraine named Ivan Ivanavich. Now Ivan and his family were dirt poor, in fact they were so poor, that they had to sell the cockroaches and rats they found in their hovel to make some spare change to to feed their many family members. One day, Ivan decided it was time to travel to the United States to try and have a better life and miraculously he managed to get aboard a ship to the States. Now his journey on this ship was miserable, he was down in the bowels of the ship, which was flooded with rats and feces, but he hunkered down and gave it his all to survive this terrible journey. finally, one day he hears commotion above, they had arrived at last. Ivan walks up to the topside of the old ship and sees the New York Harbor. He stands there amazed seeing such a beautiful sight. Ivan starts his life in New York but he doesn't have a significantly better life than the one he left behind. Nobody is interested in hiring immigrants but eventually he lands himsel... keep reading on reddit ➡