What is an astronaut's favorite candy bar?
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︎ Jan 24 2021
Whatβs a girlβs favorite candy bar?
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︎ Nov 18 2020
I donβt like candy bars anymore
They always Snicker at me
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︎ Dec 01 2020
Why was the German boy sad when sister ran away with his 3-Musketeers Candy Bar ??
Because he was Far-from-nougat!
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︎ Jul 31 2020
I tried juggling some candy bars but kept dropping them.
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︎ Mar 19 2020
*pulls candy bar out of thin air*
Kid: WOW are you a magician?
Me: no, but I have a couple of twix up my sleeve
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︎ Feb 01 2020
When i wanted to take the PlayStation controller away from my little brother, I'd bribe him with a candy bar.
It was one of the Twix of the trade.
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︎ Oct 18 2019
Pandemonium at the candy bar factory!
Someone had their Snickers in a Twix.
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︎ Nov 06 2019
I put the candy bar on my face and started crying, but it wonβt open...
Itβs strange because it clearly said βTEAR HEREβ
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︎ Oct 03 2019
Where did the Joker keep track of all his candy bars? In his Heath ledger.
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︎ Feb 26 2019
I looked mysteriously at my son and whispered, "I steal candy bars using sleight of hand!"
"So I guess you could say I have a few Twix up my sleeve!"
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︎ Mar 12 2019
What's the funniest candy bar?
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︎ Dec 23 2018
What do you get when you smash two candy bars together?
You've got yourself a Portmanteaublerone!
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︎ Nov 16 2018
Caught my dog eating a candy bar and quickly took it away.
Now he's one ruthless son of a bitch.
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︎ Oct 04 2018
What do you call a candy bar that speeds up a chemical reaction?
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︎ Jan 17 2019
I drilled a hole in the middle of a candy bar...
I guess a black hole is in the center of the Milky Way
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︎ Jan 17 2019
Bob has 20 candy bars, he ate 18, What does he have now ?
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︎ Nov 02 2018
Why did the magician keep candy bars on his jacket pockets?
Because he always liked to have a few Twix up his sleeve.
Cross posted to r/jokes
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︎ Oct 31 2018
What do you call a list that keeps track of toffee candy bars?
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︎ Mar 18 2018
My wife just referred to the 'fun size' candy bar as "2 Musketeers"
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︎ Apr 11 2018
My son just told me a joke about candy bars
It wasn't that funny, so I just snickered
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︎ Sep 13 2017
What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?
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︎ Oct 30 2017
My daughters face was messy from a candy bar.
I said " you've got choc-lips ".
Didn't get a groan but she did do a deadpan courtesy laugh.
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︎ Mar 09 2016
Why did the magician have a candy bar on his shirt?
He needed a couple of twix up his sleeve
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︎ May 03 2019
How did the magician make a candy bar appear out of thin air?
He had a lot of Twix up his sleeve
π︎ 2k
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︎ Sep 12 2015
What is the funniest candy bar?
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︎ Sep 26 2017
I steal candy bars from counter...
You could say I have a few Twix up my sleeve
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︎ Nov 24 2016
How did the magician make a candy bar appear out of thin air?
He had twix up his sleeve
π︎ 20
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︎ Oct 01 2015
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