How did Hitler feel when the allies attacked his bunker?

He was Fuhrerious

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheSebtacular
πŸ“…︎ Mar 09 2019
🚨︎ report
Archie Bunker was forced to choose between his wife and his drinking habit.

You can’t have your keg and Edith, too

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/FreakyStarrbies
πŸ“…︎ Jan 12 2019
🚨︎ report
Archie Bunker celebrated his birthday alone

Because you can't have your cake and Edith, too.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/xwhy
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2017
🚨︎ report
History has shown that during the Cold War, the US warheads feared a Soviet nuclear strike

They really went bunkers

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Projkt88
πŸ“…︎ Jul 08 2020
🚨︎ report
I hear Trump has decided to give up golf...

He spent too much time in the bunker.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kdryan1
πŸ“…︎ Jun 10 2020
🚨︎ report
There was a zombie infestation in South Korea's Capital

The president, hiding in a secret bunker, ordered the city to be nuked to contain the outbreak, killing both zombies and civilians in the area.

After the strike, he went to celebrate with his wife, but she was sad.

"Honey, we just ended the zombie epidemic. Why are you sad?" he asked.

She responded: "You killed millions of civilians. How can I be happy if you no longer have a Seoul?"

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/timeforepic_inc
πŸ“…︎ Dec 13 2019
🚨︎ report
Why do WWI veterans dislike golf?

They always end up in the bunker.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Pun-isher42
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2019
🚨︎ report
The man who saved Reddit

In the not too distant future, web censorship is pervasive; speech and freedom are strangers to one another; while pirates sail the seas with impunity, digital pirates are incarcerated by the busload.

Anyone who speaks out against this ban on open-dialogue or the free-sharing-of-ideas is ground down and hidden away, and the resistance is loosing its will.

A small group of contributors to reddit, huddled together in a bunker beneath barely-waving flags of Snoo, worked tirelessly to repost new ideas from around the internet, to release ideas from their chains, and make speech free ... again!

But it was not to be - a gang of the governments anti-piracy enforcers descended on this, the last bastion of humankind's will to share-freely. Arriving in an armored bus, ten shock-troopers breached the bunker and it looked like the day was lost.

Fortunately for us all, one brave redditor led the collective out a back entrance and they circled to the driveway. This leader told the other redditors to wait in the bushes while he overpowered the one soldier left guarding the transport. There was a flash of movement, a crack from a fallen branch as it struck the guard, and then, stolen keys in hand, the hero revved the engine and told the redditors to pile in.

He had to will himself ignore the gas gauge as he floored the accelerator on the 25,000 pound ticket to freedom - there was only survival or defeat, and nothing in between. Sirens came alive behind him as he rushed for the border to the promised land, to the Free-North.

As the engine begins to cough, the titanic weight of the transport cleaves the barricades asunder and the pursuing vehichles have to hard-brake to avoid skidding beyond their corrupt jurisdiction. Both exhausted and elated, the redditors follow their hero to the freedom promised by their new surroundings ... but their peril is not yet passed.

Though most of the pirate-hunters glower from the south-side of the border, one special agent has crossed over and is speaking with the border guards. The tension is thick. A long-faced guard turns to the newcomers, clearly troubled by what he must do.

"Folks," he says, a pained look on his kindly face, "I'm sorry, to do this, don't cha' know, but I got no choice, eh!"

Confused, the redditors look to one another, and tremble as they notice the agent's smug expression, greedy eyes fixed on the leader of the exodus.

"Look here, now, you are all welcome here, of course, and since speech is free here, we are

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Mar 23 2018
🚨︎ report
Stalin the Last Vodka Bender

Vodka…Vodka…Vodka…Vodka Long ago, the 4 dictatorships lived together in harmony. Then everything changed when the Mao Nation Attacked. Only the Stalin, master of the four elements, could stop them. But when the world needed him most, he vanished (to his underground bunker filled with bottles of vodka). A hundred years past and my fellow AP Euro students discovered the new Leader, a vodka master named Stalin. And although his vodka is great, he still has a lot to chug before he’s ready to out drink anyone. But I believe Stalin can drink it all.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AWimpyAsianKid
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2013
🚨︎ report
Robots like cookies.

Friend: Did you hear that robots are going to be smarter than humans by 2045? Do you want to build a bunker now or wait for the good, stupid robots and make them do it for us?
Me: Nah, bro. We gotta do it ourselves. The bad robots will retrieve the good robots' memory and find our bunker.
Friend: Maybe we could bribe them with cookies?
Me: I doubt we have enough cookies, robots take megabytes.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ArtaxNOOOOOO
πŸ“…︎ Jul 06 2014
🚨︎ report
How did Hitler feel when the Allies attacked his bunker?

He was Fuhrerious.

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheSebtacular
πŸ“…︎ Mar 02 2019
🚨︎ report
There was a zombie infestation in South Korea's Capitol

The president, hiding in a secret bunker, ordered the city to be nuked to contain the outbreak, killing both zombies and civilians in the area.

After the strike, he went to celebrate with his wife, but she was sad.

"Honey, we just ended the zombie epidemic. Why are you sad?" he asked.

She responded: "You killed millions of civilians. How can I be happy if you no longer have a Seoul?"

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/timeforepic_inc
πŸ“…︎ Dec 13 2019
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.