Dear Lord as week seek to produce puns worthy of your praise, lettuce relish this opportunity. We ask that you would cause humor to sprout in the hearts of those who think us nuts. Continue to cultivate in us passion, fruit which beets back sadness and joy which leeks into others. Though some may say we are corny we know you will give us sage wisdom. Give us the confidence to know we are kale’in it as we bring choy to the world and live apply ever after.
I recently joined a CSF - a community supported fishery. Once a week, I'll pick up a filet of freshly-caught salmon, a bag of shellfish, or other such delights from the Pacific Ocean and bring it home to my darling wife and children to much joy (or anguish, depending on who you're asking.)
You get to choose your pick-up spot, and I chose a location close to my office, so I could swing by on the way home; it's a nautical-themed bar, appropriate for such a business transaction. "Go to the bartender and ask for the fish", say the instructions; so I did, and he handed me the catch of the day. Gleaming white filets, glorious they were. Then I met a friend of mine, and after chatting for a little while, I went home.
"Jack," says my wife, "what took you so long? You should have been home an hour ago!"
"Sorry," I said. "I stopped by the bar, just for the halibut."
I was asking my wife the ingredients to the chicken she made for dinner. She started listing ingredients "honey dijon mustard, soy sauce, tarragon, ginger, red pepper flakes.." I stopped her and asked "do we have any more tarragon?". Saddened, she replied "no I threw it all away." I then cracked a smirk knowing my set up worked completely as planned and said "so, now it's all... tarra-gone?" I burst into laughter. My wife said the only thing she ever says to me after I tell her one of my brilliant jokes.. "I hate you.".. brings joy to my heart every time I hear it.
