Hear about the guy who tried autoerotic asphyxiation for the first time?

He said it was a noose sensation

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πŸ‘€︎ u/redrickfloats
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2019
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How do cars die?

By car-diac arrest

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πŸ‘€︎ u/xx_dumb_xx
πŸ“…︎ Oct 15 2020
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The carrot died from asphyxiation...

It got artichoked to death

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πŸ‘€︎ u/gaviols
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09 2019
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Old habits are like overenthusiastic autoerotic asphyxiation fetishists.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/drislands
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2018
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From The Hitch Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams

β€œYou know,” said Arthur, β€œit’s at times like this, when I’m trapped in a Vogon airlock with a man from Betelgeuse, and about to die of asphyxiation in deep space that I really wish I’d listened to what my mother told me when I was young.” β€œWhy, what did she tell you?” β€œI don’t know, I didn’t listen.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/user120300
πŸ“…︎ Jun 20 2018
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Dumb joke I thought of

The white girl who was obsessed with fall was pronounced dead last night. Police said she died from autumn-erotique asphyxiation

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πŸ‘€︎ u/cipherhawk67
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2018
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