Activates Puns

A list of puns related to "Activates"

Is this sub still active?

Haven't seen anyone post all year!

(Happy New Year from Australia everyone!)

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👤︎ u/shauntp
📅︎ Dec 31 2020
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My Lockdown Activity

In lockdown, I decided to take up a new activity called 'quiet tennis'. It's like normal tennis but without the racket.

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👤︎ u/MorphoKirby88776510
📅︎ May 06 2021
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The saddest activity in my life...is crushing coke cans.

It is "soda pressing".

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👤︎ u/Muhammad221B
📅︎ Apr 27 2021
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Is this subreddit still active?

No one's posted anything all year...

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👤︎ u/hipcatjazzalot
📅︎ Dec 31 2020
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My wife’s activity today was jarring.
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👤︎ u/scartol
📅︎ Oct 13 2020
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Does France ban any activities for its universal healthcare?

I can't imagine the Pierre pressure it would cause...

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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline
📅︎ Jan 25 2021
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Sounds about right.
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👤︎ u/alamiin
📅︎ Mar 04 2021
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How did young Hitler tie his shoes?

activates shitty German accent

Veeth leettle Nazis

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👤︎ u/chuckycastle
📅︎ May 03 2021
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How did the ghost measure all its Halloween activities?

With its scarecard!

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👤︎ u/Sir_Pluses
📅︎ Oct 26 2020
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The doctor asked my wife if she was sexually active

I told him "not really - she mostly just lies there"

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👤︎ u/LMF5000
📅︎ Oct 03 2020
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What do you call the love between two people that never engage in sexual activity and love eating a lot?

Gluttonic love.

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👤︎ u/AlFasGD
📅︎ Sep 04 2020
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Well I mean I would be mad...
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👤︎ u/xxDr-Beckyxx
📅︎ Jun 10 2020
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What's a golfer's favorite pastime activity?

Clubbing.

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👤︎ u/Fruntledumjam
📅︎ Jun 17 2020
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What is the active ingredient in self raising flour?

Initiative

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👤︎ u/BorgClanZulu
📅︎ Jun 23 2020
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How many introverts does it take to change a lightbulb?

Why does it have to be a group activity

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👤︎ u/BlankPhotos
📅︎ Apr 02 2021
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I dad jokes my dentist while she was actively working on me.

Scene- Me, at dentist, having teeth removed. She was having a bit of trouble with some of them and this was while she had instruments in my mouth. There's some pain after maximum amount of anesthetic she can give me. Asks me how I'm doing.

Me- There is some pain in the teeth after numbing but it isn't anything I can handle.

Dentist- Last time you were here we didn't have a problem but this time your teeth are being a major pain in the butt.

Me- My teeth are a pain in the butt? No wonder people say I talk out of my ass way too much.

She had to stop for a bit to finish laughing.

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👤︎ u/nodnarb232001
📅︎ Jul 17 2020
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I'm pretty far on the left politically but I'm not involved in any activism

I'm passive progressive

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👤︎ u/sycliantableigit
📅︎ Aug 05 2020
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After a procedure... Doctor: Avoid strenuous activity for the next two weeks

Me: Can I play piano?

Doctor: Yes you can.

Me: Wow! Thanks! I never could before.

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👤︎ u/swatttt007
📅︎ Mar 03 2020
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Why was the pancake arrested?

Un-waffle activity

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👤︎ u/dysfunctionalveteran
📅︎ Feb 19 2021
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What country has the most active stripper scene?

Poland

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👤︎ u/Spikerman101
📅︎ May 26 2020
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TIL the color magenta doesn't exist, it is your brain trying to make sense of your red and blue cones activating while the green is inactive.

Turns out, it's a pigment of your imagination

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👤︎ u/ThrownAwayUsername
📅︎ Feb 28 2020
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What causes people to have anxiety?

An over-active nervous system.

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👤︎ u/BiggerNutthole
📅︎ Jan 15 2021
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I like squirrels
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👤︎ u/note_than62
📅︎ Nov 01 2020
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Why can't Windows Active Directory Servers ever get along?

Because they were born with Trust Issues..

(facepalm)

I know.. I know.. IT Nerd DadJoke...

I'll see my way out and go back into the server room where I belong..

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👤︎ u/bad11ama
📅︎ May 06 2020
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Dad, which state supports baking as a family activity?

Whisk on, son.

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👤︎ u/shouldExist
📅︎ May 10 2020
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Why can't ants fund illegal activities ?

They have Anti Money Laundering

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👤︎ u/dadjokeretailer
📅︎ Apr 27 2020
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Is this sub still active?

https://imgur.com/a/ggw9xpn

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👤︎ u/MohamedKebab
📅︎ Dec 31 2019
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Is this sub still active?

I haven't seen a post all-

Wait... Damn it! I posted this joke too early.

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👤︎ u/Rosemourne
📅︎ Dec 31 2019
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How do you get peak activity?

Climb a mountain!

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👤︎ u/jlionbad
📅︎ Mar 02 2020
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Sex is probably the only activity where late comers are appreciated
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👤︎ u/doktorstrange7
📅︎ Nov 06 2019
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My middle school once had an anti-bulling activity and our teacher all told us "If you see something, say something!"

The blind kid didn't say a word for the rest of they school year.

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👤︎ u/FlumeHound9
📅︎ Aug 08 2019
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What did the snail say to his voice activated vehicle when it asked him if he was ready to go for a drive

Yes car go

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👤︎ u/absurd-bird-turd
📅︎ Jan 17 2020
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My niece who is active in politics just had a face lift...

She's an altered stateswoman.

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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline
📅︎ Jan 29 2020
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EVA stands for Extra Vehicular Activity
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👤︎ u/pickle16
📅︎ Dec 15 2018
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The saddest activity in my life is crushing my Coke cans.

Its soda pressing.

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👤︎ u/xXWOLFXx8888
📅︎ Aug 30 2020
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Is this sub still active?

There hasn’t been any posts all year.

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👤︎ u/I_Fart_Liquids
📅︎ Jan 01 2018
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Is this sub still active?

There hasn't been any posts all year.

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👤︎ u/Flamingturtle1
📅︎ Jan 01 2017
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Is this sub still active?

Nobody has posted anything all year!

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👤︎ u/frillip
📅︎ Jan 01 2016
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Is this sub still active?

There have been barely any posts all year.

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👤︎ u/JohnMickoTheSicko
📅︎ Jan 01 2019
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Is this sub still active?

There haven't been any posts all year!

australia squad

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👤︎ u/ionedur
📅︎ Dec 31 2018
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Is this sub still active?

https://imgur.com/a/ggw9xpn

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👤︎ u/MohamedKebab
📅︎ Dec 31 2018
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Is this sub still active? There hasn't been a post all year
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👤︎ u/thelukecameron
📅︎ Jan 01 2019
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Is this sub still active?

There hasn’t been a post all year.

Happy New Years from Bangkok, Thailand!

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👤︎ u/thepobv
📅︎ Dec 31 2018
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