What did the wino do after having too much to drink?

He ordered a cab

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/cantankerousrat
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 23 2018
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I was dining with a friend when she said she liked wine so much I could call her a wino.

So I said, "You know what they say about white winos?"

"They're endangered"

How am I not a dad yet?

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/JJumboShrimp
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 09 2017
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I was nervous before a presentation i had to do

DAD: U all ready for your presentation ME: yea but im kinda nervous, feeling the butterflies in my stomach DAD: well you should't have eaten caterpillars then

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/ringboard
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 01 2014
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