Walker tariff Puns

Administration:

Vice President: Lyman Trumbull

Secretary of State: William Marvin (1861-1862 (resigns in protest of influence of Dickinson)), Daniel S. Dickinson (1862-1864 (removed)), William O. Butler (1864-1865)

Secretary of the Treasury: Daniel S. Dickinson (1861-1862 (promoted)), Robert J. Walker (1862-1864 (fired)), Andrew Johnson (1864-1865)

Secretary of War: William K. Sebastian (1861-1864 (fired)), Joseph Lane (1864 (nomination rejected due to Confederate history, later fired as interim appointee)), William K. Sebastian (1864-1865)

Attorney General: Joseph Lane (1861-1864 (fired)), Clement Vallandigham (1864-1865)

Secretary of the Navy: Benjamin Butler (1861-1864 (made Ambassador to Russia)), John P. Hale (1864-1865)

Secretary of the Interior: Benjamin Fitzpatrick (1861-1864 (fired)), John C. Breckinridge (1864 (temporary, removed)), Jeremiah Clemens (1864-1865)

Postmaster General: Andrew Johnson (1861-1864 (promoted to Secretary of the Treasury)), Curtis H. Brogden (1864-1865)

Some have said the presidency of Franklin Pierce never truly began. After winning a razor thin election fraught with claims of fraud, culminating in riots by Prohibitionist Dow supporters in objection to what they viewed as suppression by the duopoly, Franklin Pierce's tenure as president began under a inauspicious cloud, heightened by events in Pierce's personal life. Several weeks prior to the inauguration, the President-elect and his family scheduled a trip by train to rural New Hampshire for a final sojourn prior to four years in the nation's highest office; the next day, defeated candidate Nathaniel P. Tallmadge arrived to confront Pierce, the first time they ever met. Tallmadge claimed he had had a premonition of danger and begged Pierce not to go on the train, saying "You may have defeated me for the Presidency, sir, but I cannot let ill fall upon you." Dismissing the ghost-obsessed former candidate as crazy, Pierce had him removed by the police.

Thus, on February 8th, 1861, less than a month prior to President-elect Pierce's inauguration he boarded a train car with his wife Jane and 19 year old son Benjamin, happily chatting about the upcoming presidency. The train car, and with it, perhaps, Pierce's presidency and his life itself, derailed. The car imploded and Pierce's last sight prior to losing consciousness was the corpses of his wife and child. The President himself was not spared injury, suffering from several fractures and a concussion, the af

Party: Democrat

Home State: Pennsylvania

Term: 1857-1861

Buchanan was probably the most experienced man to occupy the oval office, besides John Quincy Adams. He served as Secretary of State (1845-1849), House of Representatives in Pennsylvania (1814-1816), U.S. House of Representatives (1821-1831), Minister to Russia (1832-1833), Minister to Great Britain (1853-1856), Chairman of the House Judiciary Committee (1829-1831) and U.S. Senator in Pennsylvania (1834-1845). That approximately 31 years of a political career before the presidency. You would think such a man would be great for the presidency...oh boy.

DOMESTIC POLICY

Slavery

James Buchanan was a repeat of Franklin Pierce, a northerner who had supported southerner sympathies. Pierce was a disaster with slavery with his shenanigans in Kansas and you would think after the failures of Pierce, Buchanan would try not to repeat it. Oh boy you are wrong.

Senator Stephen Douglas drafted a constitution known as the Lecompton Constitution. It included provisions to protect slaveholding in the state and to exclude free people of color from its bill of rights. Slavery was the subject of Article 7, which protected the right to slave "property", and prevented the legislature from emancipating slaves without their owners' consent, and without full compensation to their owners. It was initially approved in a rigged election in December 1857, but overwhelmingly defeated in a second vote in January 1858 by a majority of voters in the Kansas Territory.

Buchanan publicly endorsed the Lecompton Constitution believing it was the right choice for Kansas. He demanded all democrats to support the Constitution and tried his absolute best to get votes for the Constitution. He offered literal bribes so he could pay for campaigns supporting the pro-slavery movement. Petty corruption at it's finest. Northerners rightfully called out Buchanan as tool of the Southerner ''slave power.'''

In other areas, Buchanan intervened in the Dred Scott case in which he pushed the judges to vote against Dred Scott. Roger Taney, a good friend of Buchanan's, delivered the majority opinion in one of the worst supreme court cases ever (Plessy v. Ferguson is close). It divided the Democratic party and was one of his worst decisions in office. Combine this with his heavy enforcement of the Fugitive slave act and doing nothing with the secessionist crisis and you got a true doughface.

Utah war

Buchanan hated Mormons (a religious g

Party: Democrat

Home State: New Hampshire

Term: 1853-1857

I have absolutely no idea what to write for Pierce here in the beginning.... He is hot.

DOMESTIC POLICY

Slavery: The tale of two states and their brawl

Franklin Pierce came into office proving to be a dough face which meant he was a Northerner with Southern sympathies. He thought the 1850 Compromise would solve everything (it did not, but it did quite a lot of things). Some people however had ideas to progress the nation with their own compromises and one of those people was Senator Stephen Douglas who negotiated the Kansas-Nebraska Act. Douglas drafted the federal bill and it gained a lot of traction both in the North and South.

To give a short explanation, it would have repealed the Missouri Compromise by allowing Kansas and Nebraska to vote for their political stances on slavery. This was known as ''popular sovereignty'' and Douglas supported it.

The South (specifically Southern Democrats) loved it. They had suffered some bad loses in the 1854 midterms and needed something to help boost their popularity. The North loathed it as they feared it could damage their strength due to the fact it wanted to repeal the Missouri Compromise. Pierce was initially skeptical of Douglas's bill, knowing it would arouse bitter opposition from the North, but Douglas, Secretary of War Davis, and a group of powerful Southern senators known as the "F Street Mess" convinced Pierce to support the bill.

Pierce signed the bill and it passed. Stephen Douglas had touted his bill as a peaceful settlement of national issues, but what it produced was a prelude to civil war. The Whig Party's members split along regional lines with Northern Whigs opposing it and Southern Whigs endorsing the legislation. The Whig Party collapsed as a result of the regional divisions caused by the Kansas-Nebraska Act. In Ohio, the Kansas-Nebraska Act led to the creation of the Fusion Party, a precursor of the Republican Party, in 1854.

After a while, the real fiasco happened: Bleeding Kansas. It has been since known as a small prelude to the Civil war. BK occurred after northerners and southerners went to Kansas and started to beat each other up. One main name was John Brown a viscous abolitionist who led murdurous attacks on Southern slave holders. Sporadic outbursts of violence occurred between pro- and anti-slavery forces in late 1855 and early 1856. In a sharp escalation of that violence, a pro-slavery group stormed the Free

>HISTORY

After WW4, And the death of President George W. Bush, Vice President Rudy Giuliani took power and declared martial law. WW4 Never officially ended, but yet each nation slowly stopped the fighting due to the obvious destruction across the world. After WW4, President Giuliani declared Martial law. This action angered many in the United states as this action temporarily halted all Elections. States in the Great Lakes region, States on the Pacific, and Texas all declared independence. The war ended in 2005 with The Pacific States of America, The Great Lakes Union, And the Republic of Texas all gaining Independence. And shortly after the Second American Civil war, Canada broke up leading to a power vacuum in the region. Besides that, a civil war in Cuba also erupted and the US and Texas both share it.

Map of North America

Red = Republic of Texas (President: George P. Bush)

Orange = Great Lakes Union (President: Sean Duffy)

Green = Kingdom of Mexico (President: Alex Padilla)

Purple = North American Federation (Prime Minister: Xavier J. Trudeau)

Yellow = Pacific States of America (President: Gavin Newson)

Blue = United States (President: Josh Hawley)

(This series will be focusing on the United States and it's presidents)

In between 2009 and 2041 there have been 5 presidents in the United States:

President John Kerry: 2009-2017

Portrait of John Kerry, c. 2009

Kerry won in the same fashion as Obama in our timeline in 2008, with pretty much the same margin. He tried his best to unite the country by removing most of Guilani's ideas such as his martial law which saw an increase in democracy. However, the economy was weak. Many blamed Kerry, but it is generally agreed that whoever took after Guilani would have a weak economy due to the recent Nuclear war. He was able to win reelection in 2012. He promoted environmentalism and drafted a bill that would promote clear air and national forests. He also drafted and signed the ''Fixing America's Surface Act'' which got $305,000,000,000 spent on infrastructure plans. This helped infrastructure but many say it hurt the economy because of high spending. It did good overall but the debt rose.

President Matt Blunt: 2017-2025

[Po

Administration

Dallas' cabinet was the first and so far only one that stayed the same. While with some political differences, everyone generally got along. Dallas regularly consulted his Attorney General and Secretary of State. Dallas wished that his cabinet could at the same time pursue their political ambitions while also supporting Dallas'.

DOMESTIC POLICY

Tariffs

Dallas was a supporter of protectionist tariffs and prior to becoming vice president under Polk, wanted to raise them, however under Polk he agreed to lower them and now as president he was in a sticky situation. Should Dallas continue Polk's policies or should he pursue his beliefs. Dallas consulted his Secretaries of State and Treasury and decided on lowering them.

Robert J. Walker yet again drafted a bill that lowered them, this time known as the Robert Tariff of 1848. The tariff passed though Congress but it was a tie in the Senate. Aaron V. Brown casted the tie breaking vote in favor of the bill and it lowered tariffs by an additional 14%.

Internal Improvements

Dallas supporter internal improvements and so he went to work:

1. James Polk vetoed a bill that would have organized Wisconsin Territory. Dallas along with his Secretary of the Interior brings back the bill and signs it, it passes and Wisconsin territory starts organization and construction. He keeps John Catlin as Governor of Wisconsin Territory.
2. Dallas proposed prolonging the Erie Canal from Troy Albany all the way to Gloucester hoping that it would connect to the Atlantic Ocean. The idea is widely supported and Dallas au

Political Party: Democrat

Home State: ?

Term: 1845-1849

James Polk was very much a prodigy of Andrew Jackson. They were both born in Waxhaws, both have their birth states disputed, both supported Jacksonian-Democracy but most of all: both have interesting hair styles. Jackson's is messy and tall, but very freaky. Polk's is a mullet, well kept and clean. Polk's presidency has been received in a very divided manor. Some argue he is a war-mongering, lying scumbag. Others say he was an effective, efficient player in the political game. These are my thoughts on him:

DOMESTIC POLICY

Economics: Tariff, Treasury, Gold

James Polk hat outlined his goals, 2 for Domestic policy and 2 for Foreign policy. Both of his domestic initiatives revolved around economics and it was clear that he followed in the steps of Jackson and van Buren.

A) His first goal was to call for tariff reduction. Polk got his Secretary of Treasury (Robert J. Walker) to drat a bill that would call for lower tariffs and Walker fulfilled his deed, drafting the Walker Tariff of 1846. It passed through Congress however it was a tie in the Senate and Vice President George Dallas had to cast the tie breaking vote in favor of the bill. It lowered tariffs to all new lows. The reduction of tariffs in the United States and the repeal of the Corn Laws in Great Britain led to a boom in Anglo-American trade.

B) After the tariff reduction, he then called for an Independent Treasury revival. If you read my previous two posts, you know I am opposed to the Treasury for it's unnecessary restrict of credit and generally failure to lower inflation, as well as leading to counterfeiting. It was counterproductive and overall in later recession (like the Panic of 1893) it was ineffective and inefficient.

C) After winning the Mexican war and inquiring California, gold was discovered there. Some believed this wouldn't make an impact since California was far away from the states with the most population then (primarily Pennsylvania). However as more people went to California the gold got more value. California had a rising population, gold was valuable in trade and it overall led to an Anglo-American boom in the economy. In large because of this gold, the Whigs were unable to whip up popular enthusiasm for a revival of the national bank after Polk left office.

Department of the Interior

In one of hist last days in office, Polk sought to establish a new cabinet position and he delivered on that promise.

Phil

Party: Whig (1841), Independent (1841-1845)

Home State: Virginia

Term: 1841-1845

John Tyler is often listed among the worst presidents at worst and mediocre at best, when in reality Tyler's many successes in the White House are overlooked. I have always wondered the reasoning for Tyler's low ratings on rankings such as tier lists and have asked multiple times the authors. I have gotten the same answers which have been very interesting however usually inconsistent. I want to use this post not just as a reason to why Tyler ,in my opinion, is good, but also just a general post for a more educated view on President Tyler, perhaps the most misunderstood president of all time.

DOMESTIC POLICY

Tyler Precedent

March 4th, 1841. The day fellow Whig and general William Henry Harrison became 9th president of the United States. His inaugural address was rainy and long; it still remains the longest address yet. Soon after, Harrison appointed his cabinet and planned a special session however he got sick. He had daily diarrhea and reportedly weak and frail. On April 4th, only a month after the inaugural address, Harrison passed away from pneumonia which some report that he got from the bad water quality in the White House which is opposite from the average story where he refused to wear a coat.

With Harrison's death, a political crisis arose. What will happen next? That question was answered by John Tyler who insisted that he was in charge now. Many thought that this was ludicrous such a John Quincy Adams who sent many letters to Tyler referring him as ''acting-president''. Tyler sent those letters back unread. After an entire day of craziness on April 6th, he ordered to inaugurate himself. This has set a precedent that still lasts to this day. This precedent has gave us the following presidents: Fillmore, Johnson, Arthur, Roosevelt, Coolidge, Truman and Johnson.

National Bank

The Whigs now have another Whig president and they thought he was going to be a puppet and so they immediately drafted legislation to pass their number one goal: form another national bank. Little did they know, Tyler was no puppet. You see, Tyler was a Democrat before he was president however when Jackson came to power he was outraged with the Nullification Crisis, the Second Seminole War and the general expansion of power for the president. He joined the Whig party reluctantly despite hating their policies and so when the national bank bill came at his desk, he vetoed it.

The

Go post NSFW jokes somewhere else. If I can't tell my kids this joke, then it is not a DAD JOKE.

If you feel it's appropriate to share NSFW jokes with your kids, that's on you. But a real, true dad joke should work for anyone's kid.

Mods... If you exist... Please, stop this madness. Rule #6 should simply not allow NSFW or (wtf) NSFL tags. Also, remember that MINORS browse this subreddit too? Why put that in rule #6, then allow NSFW???

Please consider changing rule #6. I love this sub, but the recent influx of NSFW tagged posts that get all the upvotes, just seem wrong when there are good solid DAD jokes being overlooked because of them.

Thank you,

A Dad.

Well, toucan play at that game.

Martin Freeman, and Andy Serkis.

They also play roles in Lord of the Rings.

I guess that makes them the Tolkien white guys.

She said apple-lutely

'Eye-do'

This is my first post pls don't kill me lol.

The people in the comment section is why I love this subreddit!!

Cred once again my sis wants credit lol