Covid, H.I.V. and the Flue, walks into a bar....
Bartender says, "What is this, some kind of sick joke?"
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︎ Oct 17 2022
Never play with the buttons on your T. V. Controller
It isnβt remotely funny
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︎ May 01 2023
When a flock of geese fly in a βVβ, why is one side longer than the other?
There are more birds on that side.
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︎ Jan 27 2023
Mr. V
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︎ Mar 02 2023
If I become a Russian by pronouncing b as v....
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︎ Mar 18 2023
What does T.V. stand for?
So you can see the screen clearly.
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︎ Feb 28 2023
What did the letter U say to the letter V?
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︎ Nov 15 2022
I have this slight speech impediiment that makes me say "b" like "v".
If that makes me sound Russian, so ve it.
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︎ Feb 14 2023
When you see geese flying in a V formation, know why one side of the V is longer than the other?
More geese on that sidde.
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︎ Jan 29 2023
Pomoc! Zasekla se mi klΓ‘vesnice v ΔeΕ‘tinΔ!
It's gotten Prague-gressively worse, I should really Czech my settings.
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︎ Jul 19 2022
I JUST WATCHED A T.V. DOCUMENTARY ABOUT BEAVERS
It Was The Best Dam Programme I Ever Seen
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︎ Oct 03 2022
I shouted at my son, "Itβs a shame nothing is built in the U.S. anymore! The T.V. we just bought says, βBuilt in Antennaβ and to be perfectly honest..."
"I donβt even know where that is!"
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︎ Aug 10 2021
People seem to have really strong opinions about Roe v. Wade
If you ask me, theyβre both perfectly good ways to cross a river.
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︎ May 06 2022
The last time I had to worry about Roe V Wade, it was because my dad was threatening to throw me out of a canoe!
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︎ May 04 2022
What do you call a rock band that only plays on V shaped guitars?
V guitarians.
.
The bass player from Norwegian band "Black Debbath" told that joke at a show I was at last night.
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︎ Oct 30 2022
Once i killed somebody in GTA V when my car's tire hit him
I think you can say he got Tired
π︎ 3
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︎ Oct 01 2022
Roe v. Wade
Earl Monroe - 18.8pts, 3.0rbs, 3.9asts
Dwyane Wade - 22pts, 4.7rbs, 5.4asts
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︎ Sep 09 2022
A, B, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, & Z are all racists.. How do I know?
Because they're all not 'C's.
π︎ 10k
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︎ Dec 11 2019
Roe V Wade
The other day in History, my professor asked me what Roe V Wade was about. I, with a loud voice, proclaimed that: Roe V Wade was the decision George Washington had to make before crossing the Deleware.
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︎ May 04 2022
What does a squirrel like to watch on T.V.?
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︎ Feb 15 2022
I never understood T.V. remotes, until one day..
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︎ Jan 03 2022
Why do episodes IV, V, and VI of Star Wars come before episodes I, II, and III?
In charge of continuity, Yoda was.
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︎ May 04 2022
Did you know there is a scientific reason why birds typically fly in uneven V formations?
Because they canβt count.
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︎ Jan 24 2022
What did *Paul Newman* say to Mark Hamill at the end of Ep V?
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︎ Dec 16 2021
You know when birds fly in a V formation but one side is longer than the other? You know why that is?
Because there's more birds on that side.
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︎ Nov 10 2022
Birds fly in a V. Do you know why one side is longer than the other?
Because there's more birds on that side.
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︎ Jul 23 2022
Everyone knows that geese always fly in a V formation, but do you know why one side of the V is always longer than the other side?
One side is always longer because there are more geese on that side.
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︎ Dec 16 2022
If pronouncing all my "V"s like "B"s, makes me sound Russian...
π︎ 12k
π
︎ Sep 13 2020
You know when geese fly south in a V shape one side is always longer than the other. Do you know why?
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︎ Jul 27 2022
When you see geese flying in the famous V formation, have you ever noticed that one side is always longer than the other? Do you know why that is?
There's more geese on that side.
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︎ Mar 08 2022
When geese fly in a V formation, why is one side longer than the other?
Because there's more geese in that side.
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︎ Aug 30 2022
You ever see geese flying in a V and one side tends to get longer than the other. Know why that is?
It's because there are more geese on that side.
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︎ Apr 19 2022
Ever notice when birds fly in a V formation, one side is longer than others?
This is because there are more birds on that side.
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︎ Oct 25 2021
Do you know why the flying V formation ducks fly in is sometimes longer on one side?
Because there are more ducks on that side
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︎ Apr 07 2022
Why is it when a bunch of birds fly in the inverted "V" formation one side of the "V" is longer than the other?
Because one side has more birds.
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︎ Feb 08 2022
If pronouncing my Bβs as Vβs makes me sound russian...Then soviet.
π︎ 10k
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︎ Aug 25 2019
Everyone has been arguing about abortion lately, but the last time I had to worry about Roe v Wadeβ¦
Was that time I was pushed out of a canoe!
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︎ May 03 2022
Why, when geese fly in a "V" is one side always longer than the other?
There's more geese on that side.
π︎ 11
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︎ Apr 14 2022
When geese fly in that "V formation", do you know why one side is longer?
Because it's got more geese in it.
π︎ 14
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︎ Apr 06 2022
When birds fly in a "V" formation, why is one side of the "V" longer than the other?
Because there are more birds on that side
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︎ Dec 21 2021
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