A century ago, two brothers insisted that it was possible to fly ...
... and as you can see, they were Wright
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︎ Jan 18 2021
How many flies does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
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︎ Feb 10 2021
I'm making a new documentary series on how to fly an aeroplane
We're currently filming the pilot
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︎ Jul 07 2020
I tried to make a paper airplane fly but it wouldn't.
I realized it was stationary
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︎ Jan 21 2021
Caution: Tinder meetups can cause sparks to fly
Don't worry though, they're harmless without any matches
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︎ Jan 06 2021
Went to the shops and bought some fly spray.
Sprayed it all over me....Still can't bloody fly.
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︎ Dec 13 2020
My wife said there was a large fly buzzing around our bedroom and told me to go kill it. I rolled my eyes and said she should call 911. She asked why.
I responded: So they can send the swat team.
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︎ Sep 18 2020
Whatβs the only kind of bagel that knows how to fly?
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︎ Nov 11 2020
Why did the LGBTQ pilot refuse to fly 747s?
He said he prefers bi-planes
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︎ Oct 25 2020
Two flies playing football on saucer. One says to the other.....
I am playing in the cup tommorow.
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︎ Oct 08 2020
Our local flying school is trialling a new programme to teach blind people how to fly.
Canβt see it taking off
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︎ Jul 05 2020
I once had to fly with no prior experience.
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︎ Jun 26 2020
Why does 4 never like to fly?
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︎ Aug 12 2020
What's the best way to watch a Fly Fishing tournament ?
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︎ Jul 17 2020
How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Only 2. But the real question is, how did they get in there?
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︎ Dec 27 2019
Why was the Millennium Falcon easier to fly after the Force Awakens?
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︎ Sep 10 2019
I was reading a history book, and apparently in the middle east there were hundreds of years where nocturnal predator birds used to fly around and ejaculate all over the place. The Arabic people would keep each other up to date on the latest attacks; and so marked the beginning of...
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︎ Apr 22 2020
Passenger: "How long will it take the plane fly us to Paris?"
Stewardess: "The entire time, usually it flies the whole way."
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︎ May 26 2020
Why was everyone shocked when the fruit fly's girlfriend agreed to marry him?
Because the pair had only ever been on rotten dates.
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︎ Apr 04 2020
Do you know what the last thing to go through a fly's brain is as it hits your windshield?
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︎ Mar 12 2020
What's the best day to fly a kite?
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︎ Feb 07 2020
Did you ever notice when geese fly in a 'V', one side is longer? Want to know why?
There's more geese on that side.
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︎ Mar 14 2020
Convertible pants to shorts really do allow you to change on the fly.
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︎ Dec 02 2019
What does the Cessna pilot say when you ask him to fly across the Atlantic?
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︎ Mar 08 2020
I asked my skydiving instructor what I should do if my parachute doesn't work. He said when it comes to that, we'll figure it out on the fly.
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︎ Nov 17 2019
How many flies does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Just two, I'm still not sure how they got in there though.
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︎ Apr 28 2019
Why did the giant Islamic Robot fly to Saudi Arabia?
For a pilgrimage to Mecha.
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︎ Dec 03 2019
Why did the first people to fly a plane succeed?
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︎ Apr 30 2019
If you were going to kill a fly what one liners would you say before you did it ?
Me and a friend came up with 3:
βMy dick must be out because this flyβs undoneβ
βHate to be a buzz killβ
And
βInsect yourself before you wreck yourselfβ
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︎ May 20 2019
My son asked me if I know how to spell "fly".
I replied: WINDGARDIUM LEVIOSA
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︎ Nov 05 2019
Why did the astronaut refuse to fly home to visit his girlfriend?
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︎ Jul 01 2019
What did one fly say to the other?
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︎ Aug 26 2019
My mom used to fly Black Hawks and Hueys.
I guess you could say she's a helicopter parent.
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︎ Nov 20 2019
What happens to a duck when he flies upside down?
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︎ Nov 02 2019
Why do ducks in a lake always fly away when you run up to them?
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︎ Oct 27 2019
So I was given the ability to fly the other day, decided to give it a whirl over the pacific. Little did I know how tired I was getting but just in the knick of time I saw a remote location that looked deserted off the coast, so what do I do?
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︎ Jan 19 2017
How many flies does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
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︎ Nov 27 2020
I'm making a new documentary on how to fly a plane
We're currently filming the pilot.
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︎ Oct 25 2019
What's the best way to watch a fly fishing tournament?
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︎ Aug 08 2020
A century ago, two brothers claimed that it was possible to fly.
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︎ Feb 02 2020
I'm making a new documentary on how to NOT fly a plane
It's gonna be groundbreaking
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︎ Oct 25 2019
How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Just 2, just don't ask how they got in there.
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︎ Sep 30 2019
Iβm making a series documentary on how to fly a plane
Weβre currently filming the pilot
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︎ Oct 26 2019
What's the best way to watch a fly fishing competition?
π︎ 5
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︎ Oct 26 2019
How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two... but how did they get in there?
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︎ Dec 12 2018
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