I bought a record at the charity shop the other day, "Sounds That Wasps Make". I took it home and it sounded nothing like Wasps.
That's when I realised I was playing the Bee side.
I hate the word "xenophobia", it sounds so...
If you play guitar and want to know the secret to making it sound better...
What sound does an aircraft make when it hits the ground?
I was looking for the sound track to Mortal Kombat
but all I could find was a bunch of Finnish Hymns.
I got an vinyl album of wasp sounds the other day. Played it, didn’t sound anything like wasps!
Then I realised I was playing the bee side.
The sound from a musician on stage bounces off the auditorium walls to surround the audience
The sound from a pigeon on stage does not do this because of a coo sticks.
What sound do you make when you swept the floor too fast?
What's the sound an England drum set makes?
My friend makes a living off of being the sound of a clock.
Her actual words were, "I'm a tiktoker," but I knew what she meant.
Downloaded film Titanic for the family to watch this evening. Annoyingly Video and Sound has come across in separate files.
Have you ever heard the sound of horses running?
It's too good too good too good too good.
My sister has been reading game of thrones and she really liked the line "the sound of steel on steel"
So she decided to steel it
What sound did the piano make when it was thrown off the barracks roof?
My favorite part of the morning is the sound of pouring coffee into my metal thermos
It’s the little tings in life, ya know?
My favorite sound is the smoke detector...
‘cause that’s how I know supper is almost ready.
Did you know that auditoriums are designed to have sound bounce around to the audience?
This doesn’t happen with pigeons, though. This is because a coo sticks
I made a joke about the song Staying Alive and how it sounds like women singing. Apparently many of you didn’t like it.
Hereby my sincere apolobeegies!
This year, my friend decided to play his string instrument with a neck and a deep round back enclosing a hollow cavity, with a sound hole in the body at the voting booths...
He was arrested for ear poll-lute-tion.
What did the sound engineer say on his last day of work?
Scientists have recently recorded the sounds of two helium atoms laughing
English for foreigners... When do S and C sound the same?
How do we know that a tree makes a sound if it falls in the forest?
Because it will dialogue.
Auditoriums are specially designed so that sound will bounce around the walls and ceiling in order to be projected to the audience. However, if you place a pigeon on the stage, the coo of said pigeon will not bounce.
This is because of a-coo-sticks.
My 3yo is in a phase where he makes up words a lot, and today I heard him singing "Crotch-ohs, crotch-ohs" over and over. I told my wife, "That sounds like the worst breakfast cereal ever..."
"But at least it's made with whole groins."
I’m telling my 5yr old about the wonderful world of literature and she says it sounds boring. I responded with
But... it’s lit! Hits the dad dab
The Egyptian government has asked Cairo’s taxi drivers to drive around and sound their horns in the hope that familiar sounds will help calm the residents following the pandemic.
Operation Toot And Calm ‘Em will last a week.
Niagara sounds like the antonym of viagra. Now you know why it falls.
What did the audiologist say after turning up the sound all the way.
I made up a joke about the sound a tap makes when you turn it on full blast, but no one got it.
What are the most relaxing sounds to a pirate?
If a judge loves the sound of his own voice,
My dad was an organ player at basketball games, one time something got stuck on the organ and it made such a loud sound he sadly died.
The death was listed as “organ failure”
My neighbour was a selling a speaker system for just $1. When I asked him why it was so cheap he told me that you cant adjust the sound, the volume is stuck at the loudest setting.
I said "Wow, I cant turn that down"
When I reach home, my 1.5 y.o. son rushes out to the gate to sit in my lap while I park the car. Then he just grabs the steering and starts shaking it with brrrmmm brrrmmm sound. His cute antics always make me forget that he's suffering from a rare disease.
It's called Parking Son's disease.
Edit: Thanks for the gold, kind stranger.
In olden times, making jokes about the way words sound was unfavored by society and would warrant a sever beating.
This ritual beating was called a PUN-ishment
I like the sound of “fiancé”
Wind carried the sound of two people mocking each other to my ears.
What sound drum set from the junkyard makes?
My daughter wanted to play hide and seek in the dark. I said "That means I would only be able to find you using sound ...
If two pharaoh's farts sound the same...
Do they have a Tutankhamun?
I got an vinyl album of wasp sounds the other day. Played it, didn’t sound anything like wasps!
Then I realised I was playing the bee side.
Got a vinyl album the other day on wasp sounds. Played it, didn't sound anything like wasps!
Turns out I was playing the bee side
The sound from a musician on stage bounces off an auditoriums walls to surround the audience, however
The sound from a pigeon does not, because a coo sticks.
Scientists record the sound of two helium atoms laughing.
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