Thx student loans,

I'm forever in your debt.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DragonReborn64
πŸ“…︎ Sep 05 2019
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They shouldn’t have called it zoom

Co-vid woulda been a better name

Thx for the awards, kind strangers!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SuperNova7039
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2021
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2020 can’t end

Because we’d be admitting 2021.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/T_fiki
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2020
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My mother sent this to me...
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bio1203
πŸ“…︎ Aug 23 2019
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Why do pacifists hate music?

They're against violins (violence)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Magnificent-Moe
πŸ“…︎ May 26 2020
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What happens when this post gets updooted

There's an increase in enslaved 1's and 0's

thanks to u/Dietcokeisgod for helping

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LolzLolzHey
πŸ“…︎ Dec 24 2019
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Ideas on how to ask a girl to Homecoming with a dad joke?

Everyone, I want to ask this girl to homecoming and I want to ask using a dad joke because she loves dad jokes. Please comment any ideas you have. Thx

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Eric_martin_lv
πŸ“…︎ Sep 13 2019
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I went to the Artic

It was pretty ice

Edit: Arctic not artic ( thx random citizen)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/OverHappyGoga
πŸ“…︎ May 29 2019
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BADUMTSSSS :3 :3
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πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2014
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Dad Joke - Ultimate Backfire

For as long I can think of, anytime I would take my family out for supper at a restaurant, when our server would bring us the check I would in my best calm and collected demeanor advise our server "Oh table #?? said they were picking this up for us tonight", to which most servers just give a ya right smile or a simple haha nice try sir.

Well on this most recent adventure I see the check coming and get all primed and plot it all out. The server politely slides the check to me, I so graciously put my hand on it and slide it back with my recited lines delivered so perfectly "Oh yes I should have told you sooner that table 16 has offered to pick up the check tonight". Well our server burst out laughing, which to us was a surprise as its not as hilarious as she is now making it. Well when she finally stops laughing enough to talk, she so wonderfully delivers the message, "thats good to know sir - cause your sitting at table 16!"

Jokes on me! But it made for a great night of laugh at dad.

Edit - "demeanor" - where the frick was auto correct on that one. thx Enders!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dontwanttosleep
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2014
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My wife wondered why I always say "You're Welcome!" right after I start watching a movie

It's because the people who make the movie are so nice:

In the beginning, they always say "THX"!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Nolanova
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2017
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