I found out today that I perfectly match the profile of the type of person who spoils their ballot paper.

I tick all the right boxes.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cotswoldboy
πŸ“…︎ Jan 29 2021
🚨︎ report
It kinda spoils the ending of Revenge of the Sith once you realize...

they're not called the Order of the Jelive

πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/saeldaug
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2020
🚨︎ report
As dads, we love to spoil our kids...

So far, we've already told them that Vader was Luke's father and that Jon Snow didn't really die.

πŸ‘︎ 27
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Poastash
πŸ“…︎ Oct 28 2020
🚨︎ report
Hey, don't go spoil Cyberpunk 2077 please.

I haven't played 1-2076 yet.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BbBTripl3
πŸ“…︎ Dec 13 2020
🚨︎ report
What family members are most likely to spoil the s’more children?

Grahamma and Grahampa

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LaChuteQuiMarche
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2020
🚨︎ report
Advice for girls: Find a man with a job, a man that makes you laugh, a man who doesn't lie to you, and a man who spoils you.

And make sure that these four men don't know each other.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jan_Tik
πŸ“…︎ Oct 06 2019
🚨︎ report
Why do the hot dogs with ketchup spoil early?

Because the sauce.ages

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dadushka008
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2019
🚨︎ report
Nothing spoils a good story

like the arrival of an eyewitness.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jan_Tik
πŸ“…︎ Aug 01 2019
🚨︎ report
What kind of cheese spoils, then becomes divine three days later?

Cheesus Christ!

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ColonelPRumpRoast
πŸ“…︎ Sep 17 2013
🚨︎ report
If you sign up for an economics class, you should bring some spoiled milk on the first day.

They’re a big fan of gross domestic products.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/girloffthecob
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2020
🚨︎ report
I regret nothing
πŸ‘︎ 3k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MissMatriarch
πŸ“…︎ Jan 26 2021
🚨︎ report
My wife asked me, β€œDo you think our kids are spoiled?”

I said, β€œNo, most of them smell that way.”

πŸ‘︎ 205
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2020
🚨︎ report
Why don’t ant colonies ever get sick?

.... because they’re full of anty bodies

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Finneagan
πŸ“…︎ Dec 19 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife asked, β€œIf someone’s body just isn’t fighting the virus, would getting the vaccine help?”

I told her I think it’s worth a shot

πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dnizzle
πŸ“…︎ Dec 19 2020
🚨︎ report
Someone's gonna be spoiled...
πŸ‘︎ 114
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fishingnet7479
πŸ“…︎ Jul 04 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you get from a pampered cow?

Spoiled milk

πŸ‘︎ 62
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πŸ‘€︎ u/vamplestat666
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2020
🚨︎ report
A joke isn’t really a dad joke

until it’s fully groan.

πŸ‘︎ 7k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Johannes_Cabal_NA
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2019
🚨︎ report
At the parole hearing, the officer asked, "Tell me, why should you be released early?"

Inmate: It’s bec..

Officer: Yes?

Inmate: I think I have..

Officer: Go on.

Inmate: Can I Please finish my sentence?

Officer: Sure. Parole denied.

πŸ‘︎ 10k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
πŸ“…︎ Apr 29 2019
🚨︎ report
this car is totally spoiled.... (x-post from /r/shitty_car_mods) imgur.com/GQeWQGd
πŸ‘︎ 70
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cloneofcloneofme
πŸ“…︎ Jul 05 2016
🚨︎ report
I love spoiling The Picture of Dorian Gray.

Never gets old.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BassWizard420
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2018
🚨︎ report
What do you call a joke without a punchline?

This is supposed to be empty but the auto-moderator spoiled my joke.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/knanshon
πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2020
🚨︎ report
My mom called me spoiled...

My dad quickly replied, β€œhe’s not spoiled, he’s just ripe!”

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dkyg
πŸ“…︎ Mar 30 2018
🚨︎ report
I bought a spoiled radish

It was only slightly rad

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/aether_killer
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2018
🚨︎ report
Me to SO: I had a dream that a cow tried to sell me spoiled milk...

SO: really??? Me: It was udderly ridiculous.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/oscarwood
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2018
🚨︎ report
Why are Americans always getting in trouble in the Middle East?

They like the turmoil

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dubaidadjokes
πŸ“…︎ Mar 18 2020
🚨︎ report
I waited in line for 45 minutes earlier for smashed pea soup that was clearly spoiled.

That restaurant needs to mind their peas and queues.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mrthatsthat
πŸ“…︎ Apr 04 2018
🚨︎ report
I spilled some oil

And now it’s spoiled .

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/malker84
πŸ“…︎ May 14 2020
🚨︎ report
I couldn't get my spoiled snake out of his cage to clean it.

He was throwing a hissy fit.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SuperMcG
πŸ“…︎ Oct 04 2017
🚨︎ report
Used to date the rich daughter of a wealthy sausage tycoon.

That spoiled brat was the wurst!

πŸ‘︎ 25
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mrthatsthat
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2020
🚨︎ report
hmmm
πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LoAy_Xx
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2019
🚨︎ report
I spoiled my dad's original dad joke so I think he had to improvise

My dad: "We have a guy at work whose name is Barry Blue. Guess what we call him?"

Me: "I don't know. Blueberry?"

My dad: "..no.. We call him Barry. Why would we call him Blueberry? He might get mad".

ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

πŸ‘︎ 26
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πŸ‘€︎ u/chornu
πŸ“…︎ May 19 2015
🚨︎ report
I came across a great movie about a semi-truck with a defective refrigeration unit that had to deliver a large shipment of meat.

Unfortunately, the trailer spoiled it

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CpBear
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2020
🚨︎ report
Why do the hot dogs with ketchup spoil early?

Because the sauce.ages

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Dadushka008
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2019
🚨︎ report
My wife asked me, β€œDo you think our kids are spoiled?”

I said, β€œNo. I think most of them smell that way.”

πŸ‘︎ 666
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 13 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife asked me, β€œDo you think our kids are spoiled?”

I said, β€œNo. Most of them smell that way.”

πŸ‘︎ 143
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife asked me if I thought our kids were spoiled

I said "No, I think all kids smell like that"

πŸ‘︎ 10k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Doctr1989
πŸ“…︎ Apr 12 2019
🚨︎ report
My wife: Honey, do you think our kids are spoiled?

Me: No, I think most of them smell that way.

πŸ‘︎ 10k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Mar 03 2019
🚨︎ report
Her: Do you think our kids are spoiled?

Me: No. I think most of them smell that way.

πŸ‘︎ 241
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Dec 24 2019
🚨︎ report
Her: Do you think our kids are spoiled?

Me: No, I think most kids smell that way.

πŸ‘︎ 8k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Mar 15 2018
🚨︎ report
My wife: Honey, do you think our kids are spoiled?

Me: No, I think most of them smell that way.

πŸ‘︎ 46
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you get from a pampered cow?

Spoiled milk

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Viphouuuu
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife asked me, β€œHoney, do you think our kids are spoiled?”

I said, β€œNo, I think most kids smell that way.”

πŸ‘︎ 607
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ May 14 2018
🚨︎ report
My wife: Do you think our kids are spoiled?

Me: No, most of them smell that way.

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26 2019
🚨︎ report
What mind of milk do you get from a rich cow?

Spoiled milk

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Sep 14 2020
🚨︎ report
I love spoiling the story of Dorian Gray

Never gets old

πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2017
🚨︎ report
Her: Hey, do you think our kids are spoiled?

Me: No, most kids smell that way

πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/RileighR
πŸ“…︎ Jun 11 2018
🚨︎ report
If you pamper a cow, do you get spoiled milk?
πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AsLongAsYouKnow
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2013
🚨︎ report

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