Ready to wear Puns

She was getting ready for a birthday party and comes running in:

Her: "Dad I can't find any socks to wear, and my favorite pair has a hole in it."

Me: "Well don't throw them away you can wear them to church on Sunday."

Her: "Huh, why?"

Me: "Because they're hole-y."

Her: "Uuuuhhh, daaaad."

I feel proud.

We were getting ready to leave for the gym when his little brother walks in wearing a Superman costume and yells, "I'M THE STRONGEST MAN ALIVE!!!!" My friend was annoyed with his brother and scoffed something about, "Luke you can't even bench the bar." Luke starts to giggle and said, "I bench you I can!"

So we were driving downtown and there was a manikin standing in front of a second hand clothing store with a "50% off" sign around its neck.

"She's not wearing any pants!" said my wife.

"Well it says right on the sign there's half off today..."

A facepalm and audible groan ensued. I may not be a dad yet but I'm going to be ready.

I'm out of bed earler than usual. Wife comes in and we discuss why. She walks away to get ready for work

me "are you gonna make me breakfast?"

> Pfffft. It's leap day, not jump-to-conclusions day.

Anyone else got any once-every-four-years dad jokes? I just wanna wear em out tonight after everyone gets home.

So, I'm at the counter in a liquor store, where I see that the cashier is wearing a mock Sons of Anarchy shirt that says, "Sloths of Anarchy" and has a sloth as the logo. As he's ringing me up, I'm trying to think of the perfect way to compliment his shirt. AHA! THIS WILL BE PERFECT

He hands me my receipt and I say, "Hey man, I like the shirt" falling for my trap he replies, "Oh thanks dude, do you watch the show?" My genius reply:

"Yeah I did, but it was kinda slow"

He doesn't even notice and continues to ask if I watched the whole thing. Maybe the world isn't ready for my dad jokes.