A husband and wife architect team were planning their next project . . .

The domineering wife thought the house needed a cantilevered balcony while the husband thought that it would ruin the aesthetic of the design. She told him he was an idiot and to keep his mouth shut. His friends hated to see her treat him so badly.
They always said β€œWhy cantilever?”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/boogerknows
πŸ“…︎ Oct 05 2019
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A programmer gets sent to the store by his wife. His wife says, β€œGet a gallon of milk, and if they have eggs, get a dozen.”

The programmer returns home with 12 gallons of milk and says, β€œThey had eggs.”

edit: I know guys, I know, it’s supposed to be 13, I messed up the wording, please forgive me

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheManicMonocle
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2018
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[request] Pun Rating Questionnaire

Hello everyone! I am part of a team project from the Computational Linguistics department in Saarland University. We made an automatic pun generator and we want to test our system. The following questionnaire will ask you to rate punchlines. It's short and we hope you can get a giggle out of it. Thanks for your help (and please delete it if it goes against the subreddit rules).

https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSdTRNrncAZTemkojUBZytgevxXx5FJ5qh0kquZiirlaGioNPA/viewform

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πŸ‘€︎ u/lenakmeth
πŸ“…︎ Aug 28 2017
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They all hung up on me for this one.

For my job in a software company we have to record a conference call with the developer and my QA team whenever we push a new project live. During the call there was a train in the background which was pretty loud coming from the developer who is named Trey. After we had finished testing i said: "Hey, did anyone else hear that? What was that?" My boss who was in the call said: "Yea i did, it was a train i think." I let the silence hang for a bit and said: "Are you sure? It sounded like a Treyyyyyyyain" Immediately heard multiple groans and my boss says: "Ok i'm done" and leaves the call, quickly followed by everyone else.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tirare
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2017
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I told me dad about an article about tiny robotic bees...

He said that if they took over a building, they'd have to send the SWAT team. It might be a sting operation

The link

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πŸ‘€︎ u/beerbabe
πŸ“…︎ Sep 28 2014
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