Five years back I couldn’t pay my electricity bill, those were the dark days of my life
My friend just can't afford to pay his huge water bill...
I've just sent him a 'Get Well Soon' card.
My father used to say, "You don't always get what you pay for."
Lovely man, terrible delivery driver
Jesus didn't pay for our sins with cash or credit...
Which villain doesn't pay their taxes?
How much does Santa pay to park his sleigh?
Nothing, it's on the house.
If you come to a line of cats, why do you have to pay to cross it?
Because it's a feline.
My family doesn't appreciate my humor.
As a patriot, I have decided to buy my next Honda directly from Japan and pay the necessary tariffs.
It will...be my Civic duty.
In college, my roommates and I were so broke that we couldn’t pay our electricity bill.
Those were the darkest days of our lives.
If you don't pay your exorcist....
Will you get repossessed?
If a cat tries to jump too far, they tend to pay a price.
How does cereal pay its bills?
What do you call a lady who refuses to pay her bills?
My wife said, “I don’t really understand the science behind human cloning.”
I said, “That makes two of us.”
People began paying the Hawaiian volcano goddess to lie down from time to time
They're calling it a pay lay
Warning: Do not buy tickets for the Eskimo lottery - they will sell you the ticket but they only pay out to native Eskimos.
You've got to be Inuit to win it
How much does a pirate pay for corn?
My friend told me their new job pays $300k, before taxes.
I said, "that's just gross.."
When I was a poor, struggling actor, I had to take a job getting spanked in a BDSM film just to pay the rent...
...yes, I was really strapped for cash back then.
How much did the squirrel pay for the car?
My friend worked at the zoo to circumcise elephants, the pay was bad but...
What’s the difference between Taxes and Texas?
Taxes can keep your electrical grid operational.
Growing up, there was a time my parents couldn't pay the electric bill.
It was the darkest day of my life.
Apparently the COVID vaccine causes constipation
When I got mine the other day they told me I had to wait 3 weeks to get number 2.
How does a skeleton pay for items?
Why does U2 never have to pay any of their laywers?
Because they are all Pro Bono.
How much do pirates pay for corn?
I hate charging batteries.
Somebody stole my Microsoft office and they're going to pay.
Have you heard about the Grizzly zoo that couldn't afford to pay the keepers?
It's pretty bear bones, now.
It used to be free to fill up your car tires with air, now it costs $1.25 You know why?
What do you call a girl who refuses to pay her bills?
Burnadebt
(Just thought of this and I gotta admit...I'm a little bit proud of myself.)
I went to the rock-wall place but my debit card was declined, so I had to pay with the coins in my car’s center console.
It was my climb-it change.
I am so broke....
The bank asked for its calendar back.
A duck wants into a pharmacy and says to the pharmacist: “I’d like some chapstick”
The pharmacist says “but you’re a duck, how are you going to pay for that?”
The duck says “it’s fine, just put it on my bill”
Our landlord knocked on our door today and said that if we didn't pay rent, they'd turn off the heater tomorrow
How much do pirates pay for their earrings?
Backup singers re-choired
If you don't pay your exorcist....
My friend couldn't afford to pay his water bill
So I sent him a "get well soon" card
My friend couldn't afford to pay his water bill.
So I sent him a "get well soon" card.
My friend said that he couldn't afford to pay his huge water bill....
So, I sent him a 'Get Well Soon' card.
How much does Santa pay to park his sleigh?
Nothing. It’s on the house!
My friend just can't afford to pay his huge water bill...
I've sent him a Get Well Soon card.
How much does Santa pay to park his sleigh?
Nothing, it’s on the house
My friend couldn’t afford to pay his water bill.
I sent him a “get well soon” card.
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