Stop scrolling and paws to look at this pun.
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︎ Dec 03 2020
Just another day at the paw-ffice.
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︎ Nov 22 2020
My cat came up to me and meowed imploringly then started massaging my leg with its paws...
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︎ Jan 11 2021
Who is Meghan Trainorβs favorite Paw Patrol Pup?
She is all about that Chase, bout that Chase, no Rubble
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︎ Dec 11 2020
A guy says he taught his dog Morse code. "Aye right Show me." Mate says. Guy turns to dog and asks "who's been a good boy then?" Dog uses paw on ground. Tap tap pause tap long pause tap pause tap pause tap long pause tap pause tap pause tap long pause tap tap tap pause tap. "what he say?" Mate asks
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︎ Dec 06 2019
My wife and 2yo were just watching Paw Patrol. There is a cow mooing into a cell phone to video chat with the team to ask for help for a cat stuck on the roof.
I told my wife "That cat would have way more grip on roof shingles and I expect more I realism from talking cartoon cows. This is "UDDERLY" ridiculous."
She may have buried her head and avoided eye contact for a bit. I was proud.
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︎ Aug 23 2020
I want to start a gas company that deals exclusively in fuel derived from dog fossils. Itβs going to be called Paw Petrol.
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︎ Jun 13 2020
Big paws.
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︎ Feb 16 2019
paw-fect
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︎ Nov 14 2019
What is a small dog raising it paw on a summer day called?
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︎ Mar 13 2020
I'm having trouble measuring my dog's paw length
The ruler is saying 2 inches but my eyes are saying it's a foot.
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︎ Apr 03 2020
What animal is known for its paws?
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︎ Jan 26 2020
A three-legged dog walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "Iβm looking for the man who shot my paw."
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︎ Oct 19 2019
Nickolodean are doing an underwater version of paw patrol starting crabs
It's called Claw Patrol.
I managed to get a groan and an eye roll from the wife for that one
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︎ Aug 24 2019
wearing a fursuit is a social faux paw
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︎ Apr 25 2019
Ice cube paw in my whiskey..
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︎ Nov 26 2018
Whatβs the difference between a lion with a thorn in its paw and a rainy day?
One roars with pain and the other pours with rain.
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︎ Dec 30 2018
Paw Patrol sounds too much like papa troll for it not to be a dad joke
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︎ Apr 18 2019
Boy does that dog look tired. I guess you could say he's ex-paw-sted
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︎ May 27 2019
My dog stepped in blue paint with two of his paws
Hairy pupper and the half-blued prints.
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︎ Mar 19 2019
If cats and dogs watch tv. Do they press paws in the remote?
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︎ Mar 20 2019
Sex change operations are one thing, but Human to animal operations really give me paws.
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︎ Aug 23 2017
Whats the difference between a cat and a comma? A cat has claws at the end of its paws, and a comma is a pause at the end of a clause.
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︎ Dec 14 2017
I wanted to wear my fursuit to the fancy dress party, but I was told it was a fashion faux paw.
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︎ Apr 21 2018
Big Paws
A bear walks into a restaurant and the waiter asks "what can I get ya?"
The bear says, "I'll have theβ¦............................. Mac and cheese"
Waiter asks, "Why the big pause?"
Bear says, "Well, I'm a bear!"
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︎ Oct 16 2018
100 Paw-sitively Meow-nificent Cat Purr-ns Fur Mew to Use Whenev-fur Mew Need
- Allow => A-meow
- Apology => A-paw-logy
- Appalling => A-paw-ling
- Attitude => Cat-titude
- Awesome => Paw-some / Claw-some
- Awful => Claw-ful / Paw-ful
- Because => Be-claws
- Before => Be-fur
- Bother => Bo-fur
- Catastrophe => Cat-astrophe
- Catastrophic => Cat-astrophic
- Catch => Cat-ch
- Clever => Claw-ver
- Confusing => Con-fur-sing
- Congratulations => Con-cat-ulations
- Different => Dif-fur-rent
- Disappearance => Disa-purr-ance
- Familiar => Fur-miliar
- Feeling => Feline
- For => Fur
- For real => Fur real
- Forever => Fur-ever
- Forget => Fur-get
- Fortunate => Fur-tunate
- Forward => Fur-ward
- Friend => Fur-end
- Furious => Fur-ious
- Further => Fur-ther
- Get or Got => Cat
- Help me out => Help meow-t
- History => Hiss-tory
- Hysterical => Hiss-terical
- Inferior => In-fur-ior
- Kidding me => Kitten me
- Konnichiwa => Konnichi-paw
- Literally => Litter-ally
- Literature => Litter-a-ture
- Lost => Claw-st
- Lying => Lion
- Magnificent => Meow-nificent
- Marvellous => Meow-velous
- Minimum => Mew-nimum
- Misery => Mew-sery
- Moment => Mew-ment
- Mountain => Meow-ntain
- Move => Mew-v
- Music => Mew-sic
- Musician => Meow-sician
- Never => Nev-fur
- New => Mew
- Now => Meow
- Over => Ov-fur
- Paper => Pay-purr
- Pardon me => Paw-don me
- Pause => Paws
- Perfect => Purr-fect
- Perhaps => Purr-haps
- Permission => Purr-mission
- Person => Purr-son
- Personal => Purr-sonal
- Persuasion => Purr-suasion
- Places => Purr-laces
- Please => Paw-lease
- Portable => Paw-table
- Positive => Paw-sitive
- Possibility => Paw-sibility
- Possibly => Paw-sibly
- Precious => Purr-ecious
- Prefer => Paw-fer
- Preposterous => Pre-paw-sterous
- Pretty => Purr-ty
- Priceless => Purr-iceless
- Prince => Purr-ince
- Princess => Purr-incess
- Puns => Purr-ns
- Purpose => Purr-pose
- Referring => Re-fur-ing
- Respond => Res-paw-nd
- Simple => Sim-paw-le
- Suffer => Suf-fur
- Superior => Su-purr-ior
- Tale => Tail
- Talent => Tail-ent
- Tell => Tail
- Thatβs all => Catβs all
- Unfortunate => Un-fur-tunate
- Very => Furry
- Whenever => Whene-fur
- Wonderful => Won-fur-ful
- You => Mew
- Apologize => A-paw-logize
- First => Furr-st
- How are you? => Meow are mew?
- Morning => Meowrning
- Phon
...
keep reading on reddit β‘
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︎ Feb 01 2017
Where did the dog jump down from and sprain his paw?
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︎ Aug 25 2017
I told my dog to put his front paws on my lap but he jumped on the couch instead
What an embarrassing four paw (faux pas) that was!
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︎ Feb 27 2017
We went to Black Bear Diner for brunch and my oldest saw some slippers that look like bear paws
He asked if he could get them and said "I've always wanted bear feet."
"Fine," I said, "take off you shoes."
He did, smiling.
Next, I told him "take off your socks."
He excitedly eyed the slippers as he pulled off his socks.
When he finished, I said "there, now you have bare feet."
My wife just sighed and shook her head.
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︎ Apr 02 2016
My kids love the show paw patrol
Anytime the song comes on, I ask them were all the trolls are. I never see any trolls, which is strange considering the show is about their papa.
They are only 3, 5, and 7, but that joke is always good to make them laugh. "No daddy, you don't understand...."
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︎ Mar 27 2014
A three-legged dog walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "Iβm looking for the man who shot my paw."
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︎ Oct 10 2019
A three-legged dog walks into a bar and says to the bartender, I'm looking for the man who shot my paw
A three-legged dog walks into a bar and says to the bartender, I'm looking for the man who shot my paw
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︎ Aug 04 2017
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