My friend in the country couldnβt afford his water bill...
So I sent him a βGet Well Soon!β card.
π︎ 10k
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︎ Jul 07 2020
My daughter said she can spell every country in Africa.
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︎ Nov 11 2020
I just got my girlfriend with this: βYou heard about that country named after Becky Stan?β
Her: βWhoβs Becky Stan? π€¨
... Ohhh πβ
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︎ Nov 04 2020
My friend got a job with a trucking company hauling beehives cross country.
Guess that makes him a U.S. bee driver.
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︎ Aug 26 2020
So in my country there is an app that helps navigate through cemeteries
That will help to avert many grave mistakes
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︎ Aug 08 2020
My uncle told me about other countries that chew leather instead of gum
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︎ Oct 05 2020
Guy #1: Check out these pictures I took of the wheat fields during my drive in the country
Guy #2: That would explain why they look so grainy
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︎ Sep 17 2020
My date asked, "Do you have family in another country?"
"Yes," I replied, "unless they're in the ocean."
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︎ Jul 24 2020
If I grow peppers from other countries in my back yard
Is it horticultural appropriation?
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︎ Jun 13 2020
My friend keeps making up imaginary Middle Eastern countries..
I have to remind him what Israel.
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︎ Feb 27 2020
The local seniors care home rejected my offer to speak to residents about the advantages of being young in far-eastern countries...
apparently it is not "appropriate" to talk to residents about the benefits of youth in asia.
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︎ May 31 2020
So I travel around my country at the weekend taking photo graphs last week I was in London it was amazing I could almost say it was a...
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︎ Feb 29 2020
My friend started a business exporting artificial limbs to hospitals in foreign countries.
Heβs an International Arms Dealer.
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︎ Feb 13 2020
I recently moved in with my rich dad to his house on the French country side. Iβm afraid Iβll never be as successful as him and buy my own place.
I guess Iβll always live in my fathers chateau.
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︎ Oct 28 2019
Pun Request: Someone has this on my country's Craigslist. I'd like to ask him a question
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︎ Jul 24 2019
My camping trip to the beautiful country of Iceland was ruined by a pack of wild dogs
They just wouldnβt stop BjΓΆrking
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︎ Aug 21 2019
My niece, currently living in another country, asked: Can you vote when you are abroad?
Me: You can now that women got the vote.
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︎ Oct 17 2019
A typical "school" joke in my country, when a teacher was checking the attendance in the class:
"Who's not here, please raise your hand."
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︎ Oct 25 2019
My Russian friend was telling me how he thinks people have a negative view of his Country.
I just thought βOh, Crimea riverβ.
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︎ Sep 24 2019
I really hate the direction my country is moving...
but I don't really understand tectonic shift so not a whole lot I can do about it.
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︎ Aug 12 2019
When I play country music for my chickens they start to sway and circle the coup to the music...
π︎ 2
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︎ Nov 10 2019
On a video about my country
π︎ 3
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︎ Jul 03 2019
My country just had a horrific civil war.
π︎ 8
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︎ Apr 27 2019
My Australian friend and I were playing chess while talking about which European country we should travel to
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︎ May 04 2019
My wife asked me if I wanted to go to a Middle Eastern country that borders Saudi Arabia.
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︎ May 22 2019
My country really gets it
https://preview.redd.it/x57ry663jtk11.png?width=285&format=png&auto=webp&s=7831192d9d485ea6bf399ba9099cd87cc9850298
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︎ Sep 07 2018
I asked my North Korean friend how things were in his country currently.
He said they couldn't complain.
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︎ Jan 26 2018
My friend is from a Slavic country but I can't remember which one.
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︎ Mar 08 2019
I was taking my kids trick or treating along a dark country road, on a moonless Halloween night, when all of a sudden, a vampire swooped down from the darkness and landed right in front of us!
My daughter shrieked,"Quick dad, show him your cross!"
Without a second thought, I shouted, "YOU LEAVE US ALONE YOU BIG MEAN OLD VAMPIRE!!"
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︎ Oct 31 2017
My Arab son asked me how come all our neighbor countries like us
I told him that simply its because we are all united Arabs. emirate?
π︎ 4
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︎ May 26 2019
Driving along a country road with my daughter today...
When we had to overtake a horse. I did what your supposed to, slowed right down and gave them a wide berth. As we passed, my daughter noted that she didn't even smile or wave thanks at us. So I said, "Yeah, look at her on her high horse"
π︎ 7
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︎ Apr 21 2019
My dad's amazing driving advice to my sister: "I can replace any mailbox you hit. If you collide with a cop car, I've got a good attorney. If you run over a nun, God will forgive you. But if you hit my truck, you better leave the f***ing country."
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︎ Mar 04 2018
My dad bought a pet rodent from an oceanic country
It was papa's new guinea.
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︎ Sep 09 2016
My co-worker just related to me a story about how her high school cross country team used to re-tell the same joke over and over through out the year.
I asked her if it was a running joke...
π︎ 2
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︎ Mar 09 2019
My girlfriend and I were talking about driving in foreign countries.
Her: "Urban Italy looks like a bad place to be with a rented car."
Me: "Yeah, I suppose there are some very old & busy cities there."
Her: "I don't know if I could do it. My Dad drove in Greece and that was bad enough."
Me: "Oof yeah, sounds sketchy. Though you'd think they'd have cleaned it up by now."
Her: ?
Me: "The grease."
π︎ 7
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︎ Jul 01 2018
So, we're driving cross country on the way to my brother's wedding...
And we were getting close to a rest area so I asked the kids in the backseat "do you need to use the bathroom? Speak now or forever hold your pee!"
π︎ 17
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︎ Dec 28 2017
My cross country coach never shows up to practice.
It's turned into kind of a running joke.
π︎ 6
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︎ Aug 23 2017
My dad got me while listing the legislative buildings of several countries. He said, βThe US has Capitol Hill, Germany has the Reichstag Building, the UK has the Palace of Westminster...
...and Australia has the Outback Statehouse.β
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︎ Feb 26 2018
[Request] Need a pun about my country
I need a pun with the word "Algeria or algerian" in it if possible thanks in advance
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︎ Dec 22 2016
π︎ 3
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︎ May 10 2017
I recently took my wife to wine country..
Of course, anyplace i take her is wine country.
π︎ 5
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︎ Jan 27 2018
I asked my North Korean friend how things were in his country currently.
He said he couldn't complain.
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︎ Nov 21 2017
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