Midas from fortnite may have defected to shadow

But in the end, he went back to ghost

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/chrisvskris
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 30 2020
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Which is King Midas favourite animal?

A goldfish

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/boomstastic
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 20 2020
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In an alternate universe, instead of asking for whatever he touches to be gold, Midas just asked for his jokes to be made extremely hilarious.

Everything was comedy gold.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/CrammerTheGamer
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 06 2020
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A genie granted me one wish. I wanted to be rich, but didn't want to deal with the IRS and decided I wanted wealth as I needed it. So I wished for the touch of Midas.

After that, everything I touched turned into a muffler.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/notagoodspelller
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 17 2020
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What do you call King Midas' kid?

A gold minor.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Joey_the_Duck
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 01 2020
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King Midas could single handedly cause inflation.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/The14thGender
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 05 2019
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I'm like the fabric version of King Midas.

Everything I touch becomes felt.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 26
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/thepattato
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 07 2019
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I just read a joke about Oedipus and Midas.

It was mother fucking gold

πŸ‘οΈŽ 196
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Twigsnapper
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 07 2019
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What did Midas say after he got the Midas toucn

Thanks for the gold stranger

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Eisenhower_is_dad
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 22 2019
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After king Midas died, his subjects threw his remains down a watering hole.

They figured "might as well"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/GrapesMckenzie
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 17 2019
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What crime did they finally get King Midas for?

Gilt by association.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/grokm3
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 15 2016
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I'm at Midas right now getting my Jeep checked to pass smog

I text my step dad that the Jeep is currently in the air right now (they suspend it on a track so they can check the exhaust system) His response "Don't let it float away!"

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/GentlemansBumTease
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 05 2015
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My dad's issue with King Midas

Everything he touches turns to gold.

"Must be tough to pee."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/xanderbeezy
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 07 2014
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What is an example of someone getting to eat up their words?

King Midas saying that this sandwich is gold.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Proxysweden
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 25 2020
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Should I turn my daughter into gold?

I Midas well.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Culnac
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 17 2019
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I love taking a hot shower.

You know, like regular showerβ€”but with me in it.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/you-reddit-right
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 30 2019
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I dreamt all night I was a muffler on a car

Woke up this morning exhausted.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/beenthatdonetherr
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 15 2015
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Met a fellow dad in the NICU tonight

Me: Who is our nurse tonight? Wifey: I think it's Mida. New dad: You know what they say, trust the Mida's touch. Both wifeys:groans

I think he will do just fine

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/rubberduckie_suicide
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 14 2015
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I'm like the fabric version of King Midas.

Everything I touch becomes felt.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 182
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ScinrynAhnaa
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 08 2018
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Just read a joke about Oedipus and Midas

It was motherfucking gold!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 15
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/CarpalTunnelVision
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 26 2019
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I'm like the fabric version of King Midas

Everything I touch becomes felt

πŸ‘οΈŽ 434
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/just87d
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 15 2017
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I'm like the fabric version of King Midas

Everything I touch becomes felt

πŸ‘οΈŽ 74
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/rivercitytees
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 17 2018
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As I sashayed around our living room, I shouted out to my family, " I'm like the fabric version of King Midas!"

"Everything I touch becomes felt!"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 68
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 28 2017
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