Marine Corps Combat Utility Uniform Puns

He cannot tell a lie.

Happy Birthday Marines!

I was a reservist that never went on deployment. I’ve been out 5 yrs and well adjusted to civilian life. Looking back now that after 6 months of training, I was considered ready to be sent across the world and defend the country. But just 6 months previously, I could not stay out past midnight by law because it’s considered unsafe for a 17 yr old minor. I think boot camp does a good job of breaking out that individual mindset, build discipline, and teach shooting fundamentals. MCT did teach a bit more advanced skills but it for me it mostly help to improve my hiking. Mos school help teach the basics but not enough time in the field to become proficient. As a highly motivated pfc at the time, I definitely felt like I was ready and was eager to deploy and get some ribbons. I don’t know much about fleet life or pre-deployment training, but I always wonder if the training I received was effective in combat.

LIKE BRUH your a fucking soldier in the military if your wearing your bdus why tf is how u look on your mind

Okay, so I’ll just cut right to the chase. Long story short, I’m a soldier dating a Marine and I’ve been invited to his unit’s Marine Corps Ball. It’s on the birthday of the Corps, so I’ve got some time to plan, but…what the fuck do I wear?

I’ve scoured AR 670-1 and DA PAM 670-1 for regulations regarding the proper dress uniform for an evening ball setting, but I haven’t found anything cut and dry telling me exactly what I need to wear on my uniform.

I’ve been to an Army ball before and the uniform then was pretty clear: Dress uniform, bowtie, everything else the same. But a basic Google search of ball attire shows a wide variety of dress uniform combinations. Bow tie, some with DUI, some without, some with headgear, some without (since it’s in the evening and apparently we don’t wear any head cover for evening functions). But if I’m the only soldier at a Marine function and I’m not wearing headgear outdoors…well let’s just say I’d rather not embarrass my date with a fucked up uniform.

I casually mentioned it to my warrant and he took on the issue like he had been waiting for someone to ask him this his entire life. But he was also decently drunk at the time, and hasn’t mentioned it since.

I’ve basically decided on dress uniform, bow tie, medals instead of ribbons, no headgear, and no DUI (my unit is relatively new and doesn’t have any unit awards/medals anyway)—as that’s the most consistent uniform combination I’ve seen for such a function. If any of y’all have some guidance, I would greatly appreciate it.

EDIT: I really appreciate all the feedback. Some of y’all’s comments had me trying not to choke on my lunch in laughter. The consensus is that I wear my ASUs with no cover (though bring it just in case), bow tie, and no DUIs. Or that I just rent a tux.

Seeing as I already own the ASU, I’ll just spend a little to get them dry cleaned and get my new ranks and service stripe sewn on. Thanks again for the feedback. I really appreciate it. Y’all reminded me why this is my favorite subreddit.