A list of puns related to "Insightly"
It's a not-for-prophet organization.
What follows is a transcription of our conversation
Me: I hope he helps his patients find Accord in their lives
Her: Well therapy is only one Element to success
Me: He's just doing his Civic duty
Her: He gives them Clarity and Insight
Me: On their Odyssey through life
So technically, Insightβs purpose is to give us insight about whatβs not IN SIGHT
He seems to be full of himself.
She felt it was her Civic duty
Sitting at the dinner table, having a typical conversation with kids aged 12 to 1.
10-year-old: "This doesn't make any sense!"
Dad: "Maybe someday you'll have a conversation that can make some change."
So, its the day "Clash of the Titans' comes out in theaters. My dad decides to take my brother and I, (we're all big fans), so we get there early and are waiting out in the lobby, my dad and brother go to the bathroom, I wait on a bench for them. A few minutes go by and I see them coming out, my dad giggling at himself, my brother red with embarrassment, and some men behind them laughing.. I want to know, but do I really want to know?
"What did you do?"
He proceeded to tell me of how he overheard some guys chatting about how excited they are for the movie, then realized everyone in there was probably going to see the same movie we are, so he thought it would be a good idea to get in the conversation. He calmy unzipped his pants and yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" as he peed.
And that was all he said.
My poor brother.
If we ever get to 2021. I will be endlessly talking people that `2020 is hindsight` and the sear terribleness of this pun got all god and Eldridge abominations to band up and try to end humanity before that happens. With this, earthly insight, I decided that everyone must be informed of the pun. It is, my and I can't die peacefully knowing it has not laid its mark on a mortal soul
Not quite as tragic, but it manifested into something which has haunted me at my job for years.
When I was a little kid learning about the world around me, my dad was naturally the font of all knowledge for me, He would answer all of little snippersmith's questions with his own unique insights and anecdotes teaching me of my surroundings with varying degrees of accuracy.
One day In a picture book, I encountered a photo of one of natures most bizarre creatures, the mighty duck billed platypus. Filled with curiosity of this bizarre creature and an Inability to read a young snippersmith asked his father what this creature was called, To which his father replied,
That's a Quackopotamous.....
As is a highly likely situation in day to day life the Platypus (or indeed the Quackopotamous), did not come into conversation for another 17 years, Until of course the Platypus came into conversation around the lunch table at a now grown up snippersmith's full time place of work.
I have not been allowed to forget I thought the Platypus was called a Quackopotamous, Indeed I am reminded on a daily basis by my colleagues, by my nickname Quackopotamous .
Thanks Dad.
EDIT 1: Holy Cow this took off! Gold! thank you so much.
We were driving down a Texas road late at night in my Dads' 72 Pontiac Grand Prix when a bug spalts on the windshield. The kind that makes a thud and leaves a two inch puddle of elongated goo. Without turning his attention from the road my Dad asked:
"You know what the last thing was to go through that bugs mind ?"
Suddenly, expecting some philosophical insight my father had into death I quietly asked "What?"
My Dad takes a drag on his Winston, exhales, and still never looking away from the road says: "His ass."
So my step dad, mother, and I are on our way home from a pint night tonight when we got onto the conversation of twins. I was going back and forth with my mom, who as a nurse was giving insightful comments on the subject. My step dad quips in and asks if there's any specific parts of the US that are prone to fraternal or identical twins. We both are kinda confused for a second, and my mom says it's not a geographical thing but genetics. He then says he would have thought Minnesota would have been the place. I lost my shit. My mom was confused until she realized it was a baseball dadjoke.
Blatantly obvious fact but delivered in a way that they are expected to show insight!
Ex: You ever see the birds flying in a V?
Do you know why one side of the V is longer than the other?
Because there are more birds on the longer side.
[At Best Buy]
Me: So I don't know anything about computers, do you have any insight for me?
Employee: Well, computer x is great, but computer y is just as good, and this week y is on sale and really would be the best value for your money.
Me: so...you're saying that it would be the best buy?
Employee: Yeah, but don't say that
For a quick insight I want to be an astronaut and have a love for space.
Dad: how does NASA plan a party?
Me: I don't know, how?
Dad: they planet.
I laughed for a solid ten minutes.
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