Post no flyers
πŸ‘︎ 741
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πŸ“…︎ Sep 17 2018
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I tried to tell me wife about a dream I had where I was weaving the hair of the Philadelphia Flyer's mascot into intricate braids...

She was disgusted, and told me she didn't want the Knit-ty Gritty details.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Maimonides_vii
πŸ“…︎ Mar 10 2020
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It was a sunny day out on the lake. I'd forgotten my cap. Luckily, I had a flyer from the local department store. I folded it into a hat with a shade for my eyes, thus making it easier to guide the boat without crashing it.

It made a good ad visor.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2019
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Getting dad joked by the tool flyer.

Got the most recent matco tool flyer.

One part of it reads: "Did you swallow a magnet? Because you're so attractive"

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jabawocki
πŸ“…︎ Feb 05 2019
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Advertising flyer imgur.com/P02VVJW
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πŸ‘€︎ u/capelia
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02 2015
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Got my gf while she was making a flyer

Gf: How do you like the font for this flyer?

Me: it looks fontastic.

It cracked me up more that it should have

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/OhSchistGneiss
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2014
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Driving past a guy dressed as an ice cream cone handing out flyers...

...my younger brother asks out loud "What's that guy doing?"

Without a seconds hesitation my dad: "He's just chilling out"

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/c14ret
πŸ“…︎ Dec 24 2013
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My dad drew on a school flyer.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Palmtreejuice
πŸ“…︎ Sep 14 2013
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I was in a punk band in the '80s called 'Missing Cat'

You might remember our flyers

πŸ‘︎ 38
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Jun 22 2020
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I was at the mall the other day...

I was at the mall the other day and saw this gentleman sitting outside a store with a stack of flyers. He asked another me as I walked by, β€œExcuse me sir, would you like a flyer?” I looked down and replied, β€œYea bro, sure.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheDeadlyGent
πŸ“…︎ Mar 18 2019
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Why are airplanes good for advertising?

They're full of flyers!

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2018
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The story of Mike and the dad joke hall of fame

Hello everyone. Today, a 72-year-old man named Mike came into my office. Mike blessed me with many gifts, a sampling of which I would like to share with you all here.

First, Mike asked how I was. I said "good, how are you?" Mike: I had a dream last night I was a muffler. And when I woke up it scared me because I was exhausted.

Mike also has an ex wife. "My Ex wife was so ugly her mom made her go trick or treating by telephone so she didn’t scare the other children."

Not just one ex wife, Mike has two ex wives. "My ex wife was so ugly I used to take her to work with me so I didn’t have to kiss her goodbye"

Mike does a lot of work for various charities. "I asked the lady at a restaurant if I could post my flyer for an event in the window. She said 'that depends, are you a non-profit?' I said 'lady I've got two ex wives, I haven't had profit in 30 years!'"

Those darn ex wives. "I’m so poor a pick pocket tried to rob me the other day and all he got was practice."

Mike actually came to my office to tell me about a basketball camp he's putting on next week. He's been playing basketball for 64 years. "I was a great athlete in high school. I was voted most valuable player by all the cheerleaders."

There was one girl though who got away. "There was a girl who lived down the street and I used to call her all the time and say 'Sarah, can I come over?' and she'd say no. So one day she called & said β€œMike, come over, nobody's home.” So I went to her house and she was right, there wasn’t anybody there."

That girl may be why he didn't play baseball. "I played football, basketball and track. Someone asked me 'Mike, why didn't you play baseball?' I said 'because I was already so good at striking out!'"

Anyways, Mike went on to have a lengthy career in TV and radio, until he didn't. "I had to quit my job for medical reasons. My boss said I made her sick."

Thank you for your time.

πŸ‘︎ 40
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CCisme5
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24 2018
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It's just plane wrong...

I'm a nervous flyer, and just curious, as to why in the heck the building we catch the plane from is called a terminal...πŸ€”

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thedurtyjoo
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2019
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Hundreds of birds came from the woods and were harassing sheep grazing in the fields.

So a black sheep took it upon himself to run into the woods to stop the birds. And it worked! The moral of the story? Lonely ewe can prevent forest flyers.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/speedpetez
πŸ“…︎ Nov 04 2018
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What do you call a paper airplane made out of a brochure?

A flyer

πŸ‘︎ 55
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JoeGed123
πŸ“…︎ Jul 03 2016
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What kind of paper makes the best airplane?

A flyer

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ChikogiKron
πŸ“…︎ Jul 21 2018
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My nephew’s school is having a fundraiser.

They are selling salsa and he sent me the flyer.

https://i.imgur.com/TRmu8ry.jpg

I replied that I think it’s very unfair and he’s going to get sick eating that much salsa.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/The1hangingchad
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2018
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my dad's christmas present

So my dad just got his concealed weapons permit recently so for Christmas my step mom got him a new pistol. Since she didn't want to wrap a handgun, she printed out a flyer from Cabela's and taped it to a stray dumbbell weight to disguise it and wrapped them up in a small box.

When my dad opens the box, without missing a beat he coolly says, "Oh, look! A new pistol with the mandatory waiting period...."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/glevino
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19 2014
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I know who I'm not voting for.

With a little one on the way I've been training hard.

While leafing through the mail I came across a flyer for my local MP and it was a really terrible picture of the guy. I showed it to my wife saying 'If he's not photogenic, then he's not vote-egenic'

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πŸ‘€︎ u/abcSpectacular
πŸ“…︎ Dec 19 2013
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A deep Subject.

Eating breakfast this morning. I was reading a flyer while my parents were talking. After a few seconds of scilence my turns to me and says "Well?".

"well, what" I responded

"It's a deep subject"

"What's a deep subject" with a look of confusion on my face

"A well, is a deep subject"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DrBlitz
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03 2014
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What do you call a paper airplane made out of a broucher?

A flyer

πŸ‘︎ 27
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πŸ“…︎ May 14 2016
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