Dire Straits Puns

A list of puns related to "Dire Straits"

My friend, the anthropomorphic cell phone was in dire Straits

He walked into the police station and yelled "help! I'm on five per cent!" First, a cop punched him. Then, one of them plugged him in to a power bank Suddenly he had reached 100%. It was a miracle They charged him with assault and battery

👍︎ 3
💬︎
👤︎ u/WalterNewton
📅︎ Apr 17 2021
🚨︎ report
Some people love jokes about Dire Straits

But they’re Knopfler me

👍︎ 3
💬︎
👤︎ u/skepticCanary
📅︎ Nov 12 2020
🚨︎ report
If Dire Straits robbed a grocery store, they'd get honey for nothing and chips for free.
👍︎ 142
💬︎
👤︎ u/lol_camis
📅︎ Jun 21 2017
🚨︎ report
Dire Straits and Chris Rea are getting together. The new group will be called Dire Rea.
👍︎ 7
💬︎
👤︎ u/cwwspurs
📅︎ Sep 05 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call an arabic prince who's a Dire Straits fan?

the sultans offspring

👍︎ 5
💬︎
👤︎ u/St_Addi
📅︎ Sep 28 2018
🚨︎ report
Chris Rhea and Dire Straits are getting together to form a supergroup...

... they are going to be know as Chris Straits.

👍︎ 2
💬︎
👤︎ u/lazlowoodbine
📅︎ Sep 27 2017
🚨︎ report
IRS Auditor: For your tax return, you just wrote down “Money for Nothing, Checks for Free??”

Me: Am I in trouble?

Auditor: Yes. In Dire Straits.

👍︎ 19
💬︎
👤︎ u/porichoygupto
📅︎ Nov 04 2018
🚨︎ report
I learned to empathize with the homeless by singing Mark Knopfler's ballads

They made me feel like I was in dire straits.

👍︎ 2
💬︎
👤︎ u/Crazy-Cat-Gentleman
📅︎ May 02 2018
🚨︎ report
Tax audit guy: It says in your file that you have money for nothing and checks for free.

Man: Am I in trouble?

Tax guy: Yes. In Dire Straits.

👍︎ 8
💬︎
👤︎ u/porichoygupto
📅︎ Aug 28 2018
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.