A blind man is going into surgery today for a cornea transplant.
He hopes by tomorrow, he’ll get to see everyone.
My wife needs a cornea transplant, but the waiting list is too long!
We really need a faster wife-eye provider.
This eye pun couldn't be any cornea
When making ocular jokes, the cornea the better.
It can be pretty iris-k if you and the audience don't see eye to eye though.
My corneas are not thick enough for a LASIK surgery
"Not on the thin eyes." The surgeon said.
I'm getting Lasik and I keep hearing that it might smell burnt cornea during the procedure, and my coworker says ...
"it'll smell like pop-cornea."
So apparently when you die, the last part of your body that stops working is your pupils..
It’s because they di-late
Why did the blind man ride the broken rollercoaster?
He didn’t see anything wrong with it.
Which body part dies last ?
The eyes, because they dilate.
Eye'm sorry for this one :(
Like Dad always says, nose joke stink...
...but eye jokes are cornea.
I was going to tell a joke about a corn eyeball...
But it just gets cornea and cornea
I like jokes about the eyes
Did you hear about the ophthalmologist who was also a comedian?
His jokes are pretty cornea.
You know what type of joke ophthalmologists like?
My best friend has a good eye for dad jokes...
But the jokes couldn’t be any cornea.
My earliest childhood memory is visiting the eye doctor and getting my glasses.
Life before that was a blur.
Puns about the body are generally corny,
But puns about the eye are cornea.
My friend told me a joke about the covering of the iris. Sure, I laughed...
But it was cornea as ever.
Son: Dad, have you seen my sunglasses?
Dad: No, have you seen my dadglasses?
Just tricked my family with this one
Just to liven up a boring car journey
>Me: What's a pirates favourite letter?
>Aunt and Dad: [Rolls eyes] Rrrrr!
>Me: Ah you'd think so, but their true love be for the C.
Saw this on a whiteboard at a hospital
I like jokes about the Eye.
The Cornea the better.
A pun about eyeballs or a pun about Australian accents?
Some people have trouble sleeping...
...but I can do it with my eyes closed...
Girlfriend, trying to remove smudges from her glasses.
"Ugh my right eye is blurry"
"No, honey, I can see it just fine"
My kid told me to buy blinker fluid
So I brought back eye drops
Why do optometrists love dad jokes?
No matter how corny you believe your eyeball jokes are...
Mine will always be cornea
When it comes to eyeball jokes...
I’m a big fan of Eye jokes
My dad keeps telling jokes about his eyes
They're getting cornea and cornea
What did the teacher with googley eyes say.
I've got no control of my pupils.
Visually Impaired
Today my optometrist told me about a genetic condition I'm at risk for, based on my family history. Unfortunately, I won't be able to know if have it until later in life. He's said it's not something I need to be super worried about...
Just something to keep my eye on.
What's a retina's favourite name?
Eye jokes. The Cornea the better.
Eye jokes are the corneas jokes.
Did you know I like dad jokes about eyes?
I prefer dad jokes about eyes....
I love jokes about the eyes .
I love jokes about the eyes.
I love joke about eyes...
Why are eye jokes worse than other jokes?
I love jokes about the eyes.
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