My new job at the nuclear reactor requires me to take anger management classes.

They're to prevent meltdowns.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sodrohu
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2020
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school has really reminded me of english classes and writing a bunch of these
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mattybanatty
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2020
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Students can now enroll in weed-growing classes.

It's a high school.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DoomRulz
πŸ“…︎ Aug 10 2020
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My teen daughter was complaining about life under β€œSafer at home”. β€œI can’t see my friends, there’s literally nothing to do that’s not online. Even my classes are online!”

I said, β€œOK, Zoomer.β€œ

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πŸ‘€︎ u/IDRambler
πŸ“…︎ Apr 29 2020
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Guitar Classes

Only place where you can learn to finger A minor!!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/faix_pass
πŸ“…︎ Feb 03 2020
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Did you hear about the baker who started taking martial arts classes?

After only 4 weeks he was a black belt in Tae Kwon Dough

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πŸ‘€︎ u/scrubZ0
πŸ“…︎ Apr 17 2020
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What did the momma cow say to her son who failed all his classes?

β€œYou’re an udder disappointment.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Indytaker_IPW
πŸ“…︎ Oct 23 2019
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My new girlfriend wants me to go to yoga classes with her instead of lifting

It just really isn’t working out

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LetThereBeNick
πŸ“…︎ Jan 25 2020
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My son got good grades in all his classes except Greek Mythology

That's always been his Achilles Elbow

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Chateau512
πŸ“…︎ Jun 11 2019
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We were learning graphs in maths and we were way ahead of the other classes

I guess we were ahead of the curve

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πŸ‘€︎ u/oleolesp
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07 2020
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Why do snails take self defense classes.

So they don't get assaulted.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/snuggeybug
πŸ“…︎ Oct 15 2019
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I had a marriage counselling session with my wife and we were prescribed Marital Arts classes, after which our relation became more violent...

I'm starting to think the therapist didn't make a spelling mistake.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dubaidadjokes
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2020
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Anger management classes seem to be getting popular nowadays.

You could say they're all the rage.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FinalCaveat
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2019
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I was confused and lost at college, not knowing which building my classes were in. An Asian woman helped me find my way tho...

I was soon oriented.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2019
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In college, I took many classes on the study of past events surrounding scraps of food from a meal

I even changed my major to Ort History!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Sep 07 2019
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Why arent sewing classes called heminars?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bowiesrevenge
πŸ“…︎ Aug 12 2018
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I couldn't believe it when my wife asked me if I wanted to try Yoda classes.

I was really confused when I showed up to the first class and they were all stretching.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Anthonybrose
πŸ“…︎ Mar 30 2019
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I breezed through my algebra, trigonometry and geometry classes.

But calculus is where I reached my limit.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Oct 15 2018
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Why do teachers hate subbing for classes of young sheep?

They're too lambunctious.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thelionmermaid
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2019
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What do you call a rock that doesn't go to classes?

A skipping stone

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πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2018
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My gf asked me to stop attending Line Drawing classes.

I usually listen to her advice but that's where I draw the line.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tgurav
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23 2018
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How do you call a Japanese student that skips classes?

Nontendo.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/shadow135764
πŸ“…︎ Feb 26 2019
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I missed the last few cooking classes about making tomato sauce.

Looks like I've to ketchup with it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sodomicity
πŸ“…︎ Jan 30 2019
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If PE had honors classes in High School,

Would it be weighted?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pun-isher42
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2019
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I started stealing utensils from my cookery classes

It's a whisk I'm willing to take.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SomeAvocado
πŸ“…︎ May 01 2017
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I took my Doberman Pinscher to obedience classes to address his aggression issues.

He's now a Doberman Tickler.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bigfoothobbit
πŸ“…︎ Jun 24 2018
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In one of my statistics classes, we were given a task to measure and analyze the fumes coming from tailpipes of various cars and to track their environmental impact.

It was exhausting.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sum_buddy
πŸ“…︎ Sep 07 2017
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A friend went to Food Tech instead of English for classes today...

"What did you make; alphabet soup?"

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πŸ“…︎ Sep 16 2018
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My grandma asked my friend "you've never worn contacts or classes, right? You have good eyes?"

To which he replied, "Yeah, last time I looked"

He then proceeded to laugh at his unintentional joke for a few minutes, while the rest of us rolled our eyes.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tejnin
πŸ“…︎ Oct 12 2017
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After 4 karate classes…

I can now break a 2 inch board with my cast.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Mar 28 2017
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What does the avian aristocracy call the lower classes? obviologistpuns.tumblr.co…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/obviologist
πŸ“…︎ May 23 2016
🚨︎ report
There are three classes of cheerios

There are three classes of cheerios, the lower class (plain ol' cheerios), the middle class cheerios (frosted), and the elite class (honey nut). One soggy morning in Seattle, a plain cheerio awoke in his single room apartment. He looked out at the still sleepy city, blanketed in a mist of rain. He quickly got dressed and put his shoes on, this would be the day. He stood propped against the bus stop, smoking a cigarette. "God I have got to stop this habit." He thought to himself. Glancing back and forth at the bustle of cheerios, he saw her. She looked about 25, devastatingly gorgeous, and he could smell the honey from where he stood. "Excuse me ma'am," his voice quivered, "I - I think you might be the most beautiful cheerio I have ever seen." She smiled and her otherwise golden brown face grew red. " This is a long shot, but will you marry me?' She was obviously caught off guard by this, but her red lips formed the word, "Yes." They raced through the morning mist of the city, and arrived at her fathers house. The cheerio bent down in front of her father. "Sir, I would like to ask for your blessing in marrying your daughter" "No! You are a regular cheerio and my daughter needs a high quality honey nut" he snapped. "But sir." "No means no damnit!" "Sir this is very unrea-" "You come back a honey nut and you'll have my blessing, my daughter is not about to marry a low life like you." The cheerio sprinted home, tears streaming down his face. He fumbled against the lock and sprawled out on his bed. When he awoke it was early, his sheets had a dark silhouette from his wet jacket. He sat up and lit a cigarette. "Damn." he sighed to himself. Walking in front of his mirror, he noticed something different. His body was frosted! He had become a frosted cheerio! He darted out the door without shoes, reaching the honey nut household in no time at all. He banged on the door, and the beauty's father answered. "Sir I am a changed cheerio! I'm frosted!" he exclaimed. Her father had a stern look on his face. "You think you are any better? The dirt on my boots are worth more than you." he hissed. The old honey nut slammed the door on the young frosted. He heard the deadbolt click. The newly frosted cheerio didn't take the same way home. He stood on the edge of a bridge, feeling the cool autumn wind on his sugar coated skin. Was he really going to go through with this? Was it worth it? No he was a frosted cheerio now. He couldn't get the girl, but he was a changed cheerio. He

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/R1pply
πŸ“…︎ Jul 31 2017
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I've had to sit through 4 classes about surface tension so far!

It's getting a little over the top.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jack_fergusson5
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2017
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My parents asked me why I was failing classes back in school....

so I said I was obeying the sign in the school zone that said "Do Not Pass."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/diamondeyes18
πŸ“…︎ Sep 10 2017
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Why do so many rhetoric courses and debate classes use the Canadian TV show "Trailer Park Boys" as educational material?

Because each episode has so many bros and cons.

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πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2017
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My dad asked me how my new tennis classes were

Me: Fine

Dad: Getting into the swing of things?

Me: Groans

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LilShpeeThatCould
πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2016
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Of all the classes I took in college, Ancient History was the worst...

My teacher would just Babylon

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SirTurkTurkelton
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2017
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My daughter started yoga classes recently

me: "Do you know what's the best thing about being a yoga instructor?"

her: "No... what?"

me: "The flexible hours." :)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/zooeycamb
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2014
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My friend is attending adoptive-parent classes in order to become a dad...

I asked him if they just sit around teaching him dad jokes at dad school.

"No they just have us fill out a form. But my form is perfect."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GregBahm
πŸ“…︎ Jan 23 2014
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While applying for classes

"I think I'm going to take this class here."

"Well, okay, but they might notice it's missing."

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πŸ“…︎ Aug 27 2013
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My mom dropped this one on me when I was talking about my classes at school.

Me: "so I made this friend in class..." Mom: "You made a friend in your cloning class?" She laughed hysterically while the rest of the car groaned.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bwalks007
πŸ“…︎ Apr 18 2014
🚨︎ report
Guitar Classes

Only place where you can learn to finger A minor

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/faix_pass
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2020
🚨︎ report

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