It’s soda pressing.
Nothing. It just let out a little wine...
He felt mortaled
Because it was soda pressing. 😬
It’s soda-pressing. Happy Father’s Day!
"Don't eat so much candy all at once!"
"Why?" the boy replied.
"If you eat too much candy, you're stomach will get bigger, and bigger, and it will eventually explode!"
The boy is shocked by this image an immediately stops eating candy. The next day, the boy and mom go to church together, and the boy sits down next to a very visibly pregnant woman. The boy looks at her stomach, then up to her face, and says, "I know what you've been doing."
now he has nokia
Without missing a beat he asks "Daddy, do you know how much room you need to grow Fungi like that?"
I did not know.
So he tells me "as Mushroom as possible!"
So proud.
And now they have cameras.
pikachu
A pavemint.
They were bereavements.
It is "soda pressing".
His job was soda pressing.
He was getting back to his old Twix.
they're all in mint condition!
it was a good way to build a relationship
Then I realized a can of soda can't talk...
because she’s really good at standing guys up.
But it was soda pressing
He picked out a Butterfinger from his bag, held it up, and said “Kit-Kats are good but these are butter.”
That's pretty good thyme-Ming.
I don't know how far this Reese eating airline goes...
"Buying him gave me a porpoise in life."
They chanted “No justice, no Peeps!” on the picket line
Milky way
It offends those who have already done it.
Those are judge mints
But at the door there was a sign saying no chocolate allowed. M&M hesitates.
"Hey guys, I might skip this one. I'm a chocolate. I'll catch you guys later" Skittle and Jelly Bean protest. "Nah man, you'll be fine, you're candy on the outside. Come in with us, it'll be fun!" Says his cousin Skittle. "Yeah, if anyone has a problem with you, we'll look after you" says Jelly Bean.
M&M decides he will go in, encouraged by his friends. They all have a good time, and no one mentions anything about M&M being chocolate on the inside.
The night is going well then suddenly the front door bangs open and in walks Vick and his gang of vapour drops. The party goes quiet as Vick surveys the room. His eyes stop on M&M.
"What the fuck are you doing M&M? Can't fucking read the sign? No chocolate allowed."
"But I'm candy on the outside, it's OK, right guys?" Protests M&M weakly. Jelly Bean and Skittle back off into the shadows, leaving M&M by himself.
" I think we need to teach this smart ass chocolate a fucking lesson, let's take this outside." Says Vick.
The vapor drops grab M&M and drag him outside and start beating him up, cracking his shell through to his chocolate. The gang walk away leaving M&M barely conscious on the lawn.
The next day in hospital, Jelly Bean and Skittle come to visit their friend, feeling bad for him. "Why didn't you guys stick up for me?" Asks M&M. "Man, you know Vick, there was nothing we could do, he's fucking menthol."
Maybe I could be her new taste in men
Please let me know if this kind of post isn't allowed but I wasn't sure where to ask. I'm looking for puns including the word Brook. Even better if it's plural (brooks).
The Rollo' Coaster
They always Snicker at me
They're all in mint condition.
The decision was a piece of cake.
Posted on shower thoughts first, they told me to bring it here. I should have thought of that first. Anyways here ya go.
But they do let out a little “wine”!
This technique became known as Munch Housen by Proxy.
It was a good way to build our relationship
It was a good way to build a relationship
It's soda pressing.
Nothing. It just let out a little wine.
