I disagree with those who say age is just a number
π︎ 42
π
︎ Feb 07 2021
For Valentine's day, I got my wife a sexy little number that really shows her curves...
π︎ 13
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︎ Feb 12 2021
What do you call a fake number puzzle?
π︎ 19
π
︎ Jan 09 2021
Authorities are searching for a four-foot tall woman who recently escaped from prison in upstate New York. She was serving a five year sentence for fraud after convincing a number of victims that she was a powerful psychic.
Now she's a small medium at large.
π︎ 74
π
︎ Nov 25 2020
I just invented a new number puzzle game that is reminiscent of another commonly known game!
π︎ 6
π
︎ Jan 08 2021
The numbers 19 and 20 got into a fight
Credit to u/Butterflies_Books
π︎ 7
π
︎ Jan 06 2021
What do you call a number that won't sit still??
A Roamin' Numeral.
(Apologies if it's an old joke. My daughter told me this today while doing online math class. THANKS COVID!!)
Everyone stay safe and healthy!
π︎ 414
π
︎ Sep 24 2020
I did it! Dad said to save my money til my balance looks like a phone number.....
π︎ 30
π
︎ Nov 14 2020
A German soldier during World War II was embellishing the number of troops he had with him
When the Allies thought it was just him, he claimed there were not 1 but 2. Then he changed his story to 3. Then he said 5, then 8, then 13, and finally 21. When the Allies made it to his position, they discovered that it actually was just him.
Turns out he was a fibber nazi.
π︎ 24
π
︎ Nov 09 2020
What odd number is no longer odd when you remove a letter?
Seven. If you you remove the S it becomes even.
Heard from my nine year old three minutes ago.
Iβve never been more proud.
π︎ 9k
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︎ Mar 31 2020
The other day I saw a large number of bread rolls moving rhythmically to music.
They were doing it in a-bun-dance.
π︎ 23
π
︎ Oct 31 2020
What are a horseβs favorite numbers?
π︎ 8
π
︎ Nov 09 2020
I once got into a bar fight with the number 1. His friends 3, 5, 7, and 9 showed up to help him.
The odds were against me.
π︎ 165
π
︎ Aug 07 2020
Some students needed help calculating the number of food and drinks they'd need for a party. Their teacher responds...
"What's the equation? (occasion)"
π︎ 2
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︎ Nov 11 2020
They also have a shipping number
π︎ 951
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︎ Mar 26 2020
I asked a German girl for her number and I'm still waiting for the rest of the numbers
π︎ 1k
π
︎ Mar 06 2020
Once upon a time in numberland, the numbers 3 and 5 were jealous of the number 2.
2 was enjoying a special position in the sequence of numbers. It was the only even prime number. All the other even numbers existed only because 2 existed. Heck, even computers ran on base-2.
As a result, 2 looked down upon all the other numbers, but no one could do anything about it.
3 and 5 conspired against 2 and decided they needed to do something so that it lost its powers. They kidnapped 2, and through magic divided 2βs powers equally among themselves. 2 ceased to exist. 3 and 5 both increased by 1.
Looking at 2βs dead body, they said, βNow we are even.β
π︎ 6
π
︎ Sep 16 2020
I have seen a number of pirates in the US Capital
I suppose they really like D.C.
π︎ 8
π
︎ Sep 17 2020
My school going son throws a tantrum everytime I bring up maths and numbers in ordinary conversations
Well, what can i say, kids his age are irrational
π︎ 4
π
︎ Aug 20 2020
Never pick a fight with numbers
They have a lot of fours.
π︎ 2
π
︎ Jul 02 2020
Looking at a Terminix truck, the IX at the end are the roman numerals for the number nine...
Which is one more than eight. I feel this has to have been part of the name creation. βWeβll do you one better than terminate, weβll termiNINEβ.
π︎ 13
π
︎ Aug 24 2020
So Poland's dealing with a surge in the number of the novel coronavirus cases. Can we say that the Winged HusSARS arrived?
π︎ 2
π
︎ Jul 28 2020
My son asked me whether Ο was a rational number, even though he knows i didnt go to school...
I mean that's just not rational.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Jul 28 2020
A number 6 large1
π︎ 143
π
︎ Mar 29 2020
I gave my number to a pirate once.
I'm getting sick of all the booty calls
π︎ 16
π
︎ May 25 2020
What is a doctor's favorite bingo number?
π︎ 8
π
︎ Aug 08 2020
One of my kids ate a magnetic number off the fridge; it was the one between 1 and 3.
The doc said they would be ok βThis two shall pass.β
π︎ 3
π
︎ Aug 22 2020
In the early 1900's, a number of protests arose because of employment of children in coal mines.
I suppose you could say the owners had a minor minor miner problem.
π︎ 127
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︎ Apr 26 2020
Think of a number between 5 and 15. Multiply by 2, add 3, and subtract 7 from the answer. Now close your eyes.
π︎ 10k
π
︎ Feb 25 2019
I found a phone number where if you call it, it gives you a famous movie line
So call this number, and get your free quote today
π︎ 24
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︎ Jul 08 2020
What number is a sport?
π︎ 182
π
︎ Mar 01 2020
What do you call the number 8 in a concert hall?
π︎ 3
π
︎ Jul 30 2020
All the numbers had a race...
Do you who came first?
The first number. He one.
π︎ 4
π
︎ Jul 23 2020
Linkin Park have a song called Numb, but to me their In The End is Number song
π︎ 3
π
︎ Jul 11 2020
What number can fly like a bird?
π︎ 16
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︎ Jun 09 2020
My math teacher walked into the classroom, wrote a tiny number "7" on the board, then walked back out again.
I thought, that's a little odd.
π︎ 6
π
︎ May 20 2020
An old guy was confused and called me with the wrong number, so as a joke I gave him my brother's number. He called my brother, who ingeniously played the joke back and gave him my number. After the old guy dialed me again, my wife asked, "Who called?"
π︎ 8
π
︎ May 26 2020
What happens if the average number of bullies at a school goes up?
π︎ 11k
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︎ Sep 07 2018
The numbers 19 and 20 got into a fight
π︎ 28
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︎ Sep 23 2020
I challenged number 1 to a fight
He bought he friends 3,5,7 and 9.
The odds were against me.
π︎ 37
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︎ Jul 11 2020
I hate it when people say age is only a number
π︎ 8k
π
︎ May 22 2019
People say "age" is a number
when clearly, it's a word.
π︎ 8
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︎ Jul 09 2020
It really annoys me when people say that age is just a number
π︎ 49
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︎ Jun 01 2020
I challenged number 1 to a fight, but he bought his friends 3, 5, 7, and 9
π︎ 743
π
︎ Aug 27 2019
The numbers 19 and 20 got into a fight.
π︎ 38
π
︎ Jan 19 2020
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