What’s the more important race, a 5k or a mile?

The 5k because a mile race doesn’t meter.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jester57
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30 2021
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Driving the neighborhood, I told my son we would use the odometer to measure out our Turkey Trot 5k

> Son: It's gonna take a lot of yard sticks.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/onejdc
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2020
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People didn’t like it when I was kidding around during the 5K

But I personally like running jokes

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πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2019
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I saw a hipster doing a 5K while vaping at the same time.

In the end, he was running on fumes.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 08 2019
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Killed my 5k this morning.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cwhaley1981
πŸ“…︎ Aug 19 2018
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Last Sunday I ran a 5K at a clothing-optional resort.

When I told my coworker she asked how can men run naked without wearing any support.

Of course I said, it isn't hard.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ReverendKen
πŸ“…︎ May 08 2019
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My new years RESOLUTION is to run a 5k... Display
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πŸ‘€︎ u/onesmallserving
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04 2015
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10 years ago, I loaned my mother-in-law $5k, and I haven't seen or heard from her since.

Completely worth it, if you ask me.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/fukhed69
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15 2018
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Did you hear who won the 5K race in Bangkok?

It was a Thai.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/alex_brodie
πŸ“…︎ Jan 20 2018
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Nice sweatshirt. 5K Turkey Trot? What'd you run it in?

Well, it was kind of chilly, so some running tights and a light jacket.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PRESTOALOE
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07 2014
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Is it wrong to hate a certain race??

Because my knees can take 5K’s any more

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Branden_the_Dj
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2021
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r/dadjokes is recruiting moderators, join us!

Update: Thanks for all your applications! Give /u/parin89 and I a few days to take a look and confer!
(if you haven't put your application in yet, you've still got time)

-

Greetings /r/dadjokes subscribers,

Years have passed since this sub started up, and there are now literally millions of you. Whoa.

Two million people is just two many two handle for two moderators. Especially these days, when both /u/parin89 and I have two many other responsibilities and a whole lot less time. I'm 200% sure most of you would agree that more mods are needed.

So we're looking for 5 more moderators to get involved. If you're keen to apply, read the rest of this post and answer the three questions in your comment response.

Answer these 3 questions in your reply:

  1. How would you describe a dad joke?
  2. Do you currently moderate any other subreddits? If yes, which ones.
  3. You see a post that is not breaking the rules or reddit's posting guidelines, but is generally disliked by the community. What do you do?

Only apply if:

  • You're a reasonable, fair-minded and patient human
  • You're in it to keep this community a happy, friendly and safe place for other humans
  • You've got previous mod experience from a decent sized community (let's say... 5k+)
  • You're cool with the first few months being a trial run
  • You understand that while we could use more active moderation, and would benefit from a few more rules, one of the things that makes this community great is that it's pretty open (after all, dad jokes repeat a lot and not every "repost" is necessarily an opportunistic attempt to game karma)

We'd benefit from a few practical things as well, it would be great if:

  • You live in a timezone that covers off either the USA, the UK, Australia (we'd like a spread)
  • You've got some automod experience
  • You've got some sub-customisation experience

Don't apply if:

  • You're ready to come out swinging with a power tripping ban hammer
  • You're more concerned about Internet points than real people

We'll leave this stickied for a week and then come back to message a few people and make some selections.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tali3sin
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2019
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It’s OK to Think one race is superior

I think the 10k is by far the best race, 5ks suck

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πŸ“…︎ Apr 21 2019
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No, that's not autocorrect...
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ChuckerDeluxe
πŸ“…︎ Aug 16 2019
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The award for the best dadjokes 2018 goes to...

… u/ebkbk for this post: Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian. made on 24.11. with 38.9k upvotes

[also already made by u/Tface on 25.03. for 16.9k upvotes]

Let's move on to the top 3 of each month:

January:

  1. Is this sub still active? by u/I_Fart_Liquids on 01.01. with 36.4k upvotes

  2. Gonorrhea would have been a great name for diarrhea medicine by u/daugarten on 20.01. with 30.8k upvotes

  3. An open letter to the mods of r/dadjokes: by u/Alfie_13 on 27.01. with 18.9k upvotes

February:

  1. Was watching Star Wars with my daughter. She asked why Luke was climbing inside a Tauntaun, I said to keep warm. by u/jakeisbill on 05.02. for 20.3k upvotes

  2. My daughter asked me what I'm posting on Reddit... by u/madazzahatter on 25.02. for 18.3k upvotes

  3. When a woman is giving birth, she is literally kidding. by u/ownworldman on 23.02. for 17.7k upvotes

March:

  1. I got an e-mail saying, "At Google Earth, we can read maps backwards!" and I thought... by u/madazzahatter on 21.03. for 22.2k upvotes

  2. Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears. by u/Tface on 25.03. for 16.9k upvotes.

  3. [When I reach home, my 1.5 y.o. son rushes out to the gate to sit in my lap while I park the car. Then he just grabs the steering and starts shaking it with brrrmmm brrrmmm sound. His cute antics always make me forget that he's suffering from a rare disease.](https://www.reddit.com/r/da

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Skormes
πŸ“…︎ Jan 18 2019
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[gun goes off]

[gun goes off]
[every runner falls over and pretends to be wounded, then laughs and starts the race]
ANNOUNCER: Annnd the annual Dad 5k is underway...

^^^^^^source

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πŸ‘€︎ u/H_G_Bells
πŸ“…︎ Jul 08 2018
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Hey r/dadjokes, what's my elf name?

I need an elf name for a 5k charity run. It's called "The Big Elf Run" and it has to be family friendly. But seeing as this is the most creative sub on Reddit I thought you guys could help.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bossman01
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2016
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Is it bad that I hate a certain race?

I don't mind doing a 5k but my running group wants to do a 10k and i really don't like them :-D

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rockistar
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2015
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Good one from my dad

On the topic of a 5k:

Dad: "Do you have any running shoes?"

Me: "No, I don't"

Dad: "Well that's good, 'cuz then you'd have to run after them and catch them!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/NYPunk
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2013
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