What do you give an abusive pasta chef who always serves wet noodles?

A re-straining order.

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CMoy1980
πŸ“…︎ May 01 2021
🚨︎ report
Your weather may be wet, but German weather is wetter.
πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dutch_Midget
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2021
🚨︎ report
They must've had wet dreams later
πŸ‘︎ 29
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ilessthanthreenyc
πŸ“…︎ Feb 26 2021
🚨︎ report
Why is the sand wet?

Because the sea weed

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/awesomecorearts
πŸ“…︎ Mar 05 2021
🚨︎ report
People don’t think the grass be wet in the morning

But it Dew

πŸ‘︎ 181
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πŸ‘€︎ u/streety22
πŸ“…︎ Feb 04 2021
🚨︎ report
Why do Russian airline pilots wear wet suits when they fly?

Because zey be flying in the Jetski's.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/WhatProtomolecule
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09 2021
🚨︎ report
This joke is all wet.

What do you call a laundromat for pigs?

Hog wash!

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/capngloval
πŸ“…︎ Mar 27 2021
🚨︎ report
What's slippery when wet?

A wet slipper.

πŸ‘︎ 83
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πŸ‘€︎ u/the_houser
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call an Arabic country that has loads of sheep and experiences very wet weather?

Baaa rain πŸ‡§πŸ‡­

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bbew_Mot
πŸ“…︎ Feb 25 2021
🚨︎ report
A wet dream is actually a dream cum true
πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/nervoussystem66
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2020
🚨︎ report
Kip Adotta- Wet Dream youtube.com/watch?v=6l1Gv…
πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/InexactDuplicate
πŸ“…︎ Sep 30 2020
🚨︎ report
Why can you never get away with vandalizing wet cement?

The police have concrete evidence against you.

πŸ‘︎ 29
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CatsNSkyrim
πŸ“…︎ Sep 29 2020
🚨︎ report
My 6yo holds a slice of red pepper up to my face and breaks it towards me. Me: β€œUgh, what did you do that for. You got me all wet.”

β€œThat was pepper spray.”

Got me!

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/gorescittmore
πŸ“…︎ Oct 02 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call wet swim trunks?

Swam trunks

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/nobodahobo66
πŸ“…︎ Sep 07 2020
🚨︎ report
What's blue, wet and smells like red paint?

Blue paint

πŸ‘︎ 27
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Meeksta11
πŸ“…︎ Sep 03 2020
🚨︎ report
Why was the garden wet?

Because the centipede.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/wils_152
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24 2020
🚨︎ report
Why can't you get the buttons wet in a submersible?

Because they're submarine grade.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/snuggeybug
πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2020
🚨︎ report
What goes in hard and pink and comes out soft and wet?

Chewing gum !

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Sep 08 2020
🚨︎ report
What gets wet as it dries?

A towel.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Azkyle50
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2020
🚨︎ report
It's been a while since I heard jokes about people sitting on wet morning grass.

They're over dew.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ Sep 06 2020
🚨︎ report
A stone thrown into a pond in 1990 has been wet for around 30 years.

Let that sink in.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dinner_cat96
πŸ“…︎ May 28 2020
🚨︎ report
Son "dad, I think I wet myself"

Dad " sounds like urine trouble to me"

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/poetgriot
πŸ“…︎ Jun 26 2020
🚨︎ report
Why, after a rib dinner, did everyone want wet, juvenile nocturnal raptors?

And why do they think I’d have a supply of moist owlets, anyways?

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/pj566
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2020
🚨︎ report
What is a mechanic's wet dream

MΓΆtorhead

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SebastianLi1
πŸ“…︎ Mar 01 2020
🚨︎ report
Mars: I’m wet

NASA: I’m coming over

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lookbehindyou___
πŸ“…︎ May 29 2020
🚨︎ report
When can 3 elephants stand under 1 umbrella and not get wet?

When it's not raining.

πŸ‘︎ 175
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AciTroniX
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you do when your bunny gets wet?

You get your hare dryer.

πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2019
🚨︎ report
Boss: "what's that?", Me: (with much enthusiasm) "it's a SPACE BAR!!!!!" *wets myself laughing*, Boss: "...................." *delivers withering look* "are you allowed to stick things on your laptop?", Me: *dies inside at another badly landed pun*
πŸ‘︎ 107
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HumusGoose
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2018
🚨︎ report
Why does Capt Kirk use wet wipes?

Klingons.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jgpitre
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the man locked out of his house in wet clothes?

Police say he dried of natural causes

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cook-a-cat
πŸ“…︎ May 27 2019
🚨︎ report
Better you wet something other than your pants.
πŸ‘︎ 28
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dirvo85
πŸ“…︎ Mar 24 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a wet bear?

Drizzly Bear

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Averet101
πŸ“…︎ Nov 05 2019
🚨︎ report
surfin dah wet
πŸ‘︎ 34
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πŸ“…︎ May 27 2019
🚨︎ report
Soaking wet
πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/eth0null
πŸ“…︎ Sep 28 2019
🚨︎ report
Can we please rename wet dreams to Nut-mares?
πŸ‘︎ 31
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dgdgdgdgcooh
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01 2018
🚨︎ report
Why did the wet shirt feel betrayed?

It was hung out to dry.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/boogerknows
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2019
🚨︎ report
Some people think grass isn't wet in the morning.

But it dew

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CyberSARL
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2021
🚨︎ report
People don't think the grass be wet in the morning ...

But it dew.

πŸ‘︎ 57
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheShamrockRover
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2021
🚨︎ report
Why was the beach wet?

The sea weed

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AussieJayHi
πŸ“…︎ Oct 12 2020
🚨︎ report
What goes in long and hard, then comes out soft and wet?

Pasta you pervert

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/yaklshakl
πŸ“…︎ May 26 2020
🚨︎ report
A wet dream is a dream cum true.
πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/hillenium
πŸ“…︎ Apr 29 2020
🚨︎ report
Why Was The Beach Wet?

The sea weed

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/imtknives
πŸ“…︎ Mar 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Why was the sand wet?

Because the Seaweed.

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BaldrickD2M
πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2019
🚨︎ report

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