there would be mass confusion.
This is because they are shocked.
I'd give it a rating of 50 stars.
Scentimetres.
Just think, if the British had won, we'd all be speaking English now.
I answered, “I don’t know, the indicator always says clean filter.”
The police have no leads.
I don't really know why but it makes a lot of cents
Special Forces
What a cool way to go!
Quartz not
Italian ships say AMB for Atzah My Boat!
- from my 75 yr old Italian American dad at family dinner the other night
It was shocking!
Riceless.
The demand for electricity has led to blackouts across the state, causing some people to go without Fox News for so long, they've stopped blaming the weather on Joe Biden.
Sadly, he lost his case.
By which I think he means that after some General Chaos, there's Major Disruptions making working there like Corporal Punishment
They've all gone to pot since Fergie left
UKrain
Because it took them awhile to get the bugs worked out
You know what gets my volt.
Oh well, maybe one day I’ll do something with it.
Talk about a sad state of affairs
An Appalachian appellation.
USB
An ICU
Joe Bident
The ICU unit
If it was invented anywhere else, it would have been called the teethbrush
Now I'm getting charged with abduction of justice.
It was a dead giveaway
They finally realized that no one deserves sloppy seconds.
It was a lost Shaker assault.
Hollywatt
It was an arms race.
Any similarity to actual persons, living or dead, is purely Coinci Dental.
I'm Blue, Abu Dhabi, Dubai Abu Dhabi and Dubai Abu Dhabi, Dubai...
This is a hard question, I'll grant you that.
Save them to your Phone and always have witty jokes at the palm of your hand.
3.14 percent of sailors are pi-rates.
5/4 of people admit they’re bad at fractions.
A bartender broke up with her boyfriend, but he kept asking her for another shot.
A brain walks into a bar and takes a seat. “I’d like some wings and a pint of beer, please,” it says. “Sorry, but I can’t serve you,” the bartender replies. “You’re out of your head.”
A cheeseburger walks into a bar. The bartender says, 'Sorry, we don't serve food here.'
A college education now costs $100,000, but it produces three very proud people: the student, his mama, and his pauper.
A couple of cups of yogurt walk into a country club. “We don’t serve your kind here,” the bartender says. “Why not?” one yogurt asks. “We’re cultured.”
A friend of mine didn’t pay his exorcist. He got repossessed.
A friend of mine is known for sweeping girls off their feet. He’s an extremely aggressive janitor.
A guy walks into a bar, and there’s a horse serving drinks. The horse asks, “What are you staring at? Haven’t you ever seen a horse tending bar before?” The guy says, “It’s not that. I just never thought the parrot would sell the place.”
A guy walks into a bar...and he was disqualified from the limbo contest.
A pirate walks into a bar with a paper towel on his head. The bartender says, “What’s with the paper towel?” The pirate says, “Arrr! I’ve got a Bounty on me head!”
A turtle is crossing the road when he’s mugged by two snails. When the police ask him what happened, the shaken turtle replies, “I don’t know. It all happened so fast.”
Armed robbers—some say they’re a drain on society, but you’ve got to give it to them.
Barbers…you have to take your hat off to them.
Can February March? No, but April May!
Cooking out this weekend? Don’t forget the pickle. It’s kind of a big dill.
Dad, can you put my shoes on? No, I don't think they'll fit me.
Dad, can you put the cat out? I didn't know it was on fire.
Dad, did you get a haircut? No, I got them all cut!
Dad: Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? Son: No. What happened? Dad: The teacher woke him up.
Daughter: I have a lot of friends named Nathan. There’s Nathan Miller, Nathan Radcliff, Nathan Lewis… Me: When they are together, do you call them the United Nathans?
Dear Math, grow up and solve your own problems.
Did I tell you the time I fell in love during a backflip? I was heels over head!
Did you hear about the aquatic sea mammals that escape
... keep reading on reddit ➡Putin gets to the customs officer and presents his passport.
Customs agent: And what's the purpose of your visit, Mr. Putin? Business or pleasure?
Putin: Business, of course.
Customs agent: Occupation?
Putin: No, not this time. Just visiting.
Not furlong!
He didn't want to tarnish his leg AC.
