Unexplained Puns

Doors opened by itself, Shower turned on by itself and many other unexplained activities.

i come to the conclusion that it was John Cena

He disliked the phrase 'fire at will'.

Late night conversation Me: What if every unexplained disappearance was because of time travelling theives? Spouse: That would be interesting. Me: And that's why my right sock always disappears from the washer. Spouse: The right sock? Me: I'm just assuming because there's only one left. Spouse:..... Me: That and time travelling theives wouldn't be dumb enough to steal the wrong sock. Spouse: Get out of the bed.