the stonefish has no natural predator to fear from....

...except the paperfish, which is supposed to be even more superior.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2020
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The board is back in it's natural habitat.
πŸ‘︎ 346
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πŸ‘€︎ u/orlanthi
πŸ“…︎ May 30 2020
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Natural numbers fail to understand the importance of decimal numbers.

They always miss the point.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/keychainoi
πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2020
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The natural beauty of Mt Rushmore, before it was carved,

was unpresidented.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Brucemoose1
πŸ“…︎ Aug 18 2020
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The beauty store told me their soap is 100% natural but I found out it wasn't

It was just a Lye

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Amranwag
πŸ“…︎ Jul 27 2020
🚨︎ report
An old man lay dying under the ceiling fan which had the bearing of a military helicopter airily surveying the aftermath of a natural disaster.

Surrounded by his son, his twin daughters and a haggard-looking nurse who looked about ready to end it all if only she could find the bloody switch, he was finally breathing his last.

His son, who loved him dearly and wasn't at all sure if he had been cut out of the will or not, burst into tears at the plight of a man who would look more at home in a red woolly outfit than he ever could in drab, white linen.

"I do not wish to die today, Anthony", he intoned fixing his gaze slightly above his son's left shoulder, "there is something you must do to save me."

"Tell me what to do dad, I can't bear to look at you this way", cried Anthony.

"There is a land, not far from here, where no one ever dies. It is not for dying you see. That is where I must go."

"Where is this place father? Tell me, and I shall take you to it."

"Take me there now", he said faintly as if in great pain, "Take me to, The Living Room."

πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LazyLeo1337
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2018
🚨︎ report
There was an accident in the Paleontology section of a Natural History Museum where multiple dinosaur skeletons collapsed and were broken beyond repair. The directors of the museum were concerned that visitors wouldn't visit that section anymore ...

but visitors still showed up to view the
Tyrannosaurus Wrecks.

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/EyeWunderY
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2019
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I was going to tell a joke about the 2004 natural disaster in the Indian Ocean

But it was too Tsunami

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/pigeon-p
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2019
🚨︎ report
My son gets really excited when we go to the natural history museum. When he gets near the prehistoric bones, he just explodes with excitement and I can't deal with is new strength.

I'm just not qualified to handle his dino-might.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/leniski1
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2019
🚨︎ report
Do you know who are the Klingons natural enemies?

The Teflons.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Joakkov
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2018
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What is Herbie the lovebugs natural enemy?

Herbivore...

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ“…︎ Jun 16 2019
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What’s the difference between a natural number and a whole number?

None.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MrPokemon11
πŸ“…︎ Jan 18 2019
🚨︎ report
To attract new visitors, the Museum of Natural History ran a promotion where they gave away actual dinosaur vertebrae from their collection.

Everyone was taken aback.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/this_is_grand
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2018
🚨︎ report
What do you call the natural smell of a brand new Tesla?

Elon's Musk

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/timmybassboy
πŸ“…︎ Feb 25 2018
🚨︎ report
Dadjoke overheard at the Museum of Natural History

I was looking at the taxidermy wild animals and was standing in front of the case with a baby ocelot. A family with two young kids were also standing behind me and I hear the husband say,

"Ocelot? More like Oce-little!"

I found this absolutely hilarious, but his wife just rolls her eyes and shuffles the kids to the next exhibit.

πŸ‘︎ 297
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πŸ‘€︎ u/but-actually
πŸ“…︎ May 07 2014
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It seems only natural that the Flat Earth theory

is not gathering any momentum.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24 2018
🚨︎ report
I had an uncle named Stanley, who was a natural in the moving business.

Stanley worked his way up from nothing in a third world country, saving enough to move to America and support his family. His loyal customer base grew by word of mouth, nobody argued with his results. Finally one day, a customer asked him how he managed to be so good at his work, and he merely responded, "I'm from Pakistan."

ba dum tss

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KetoSaiba
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2016
🚨︎ report
It's only natural that us adults stare at our phones all the time...

because as babies, we were taught to stare at the mobiles above our cribs.

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/OK_Compooper
πŸ“…︎ Dec 08 2016
🚨︎ report
Waitstaff, the next natural target for dadjokes, after family.

Waitress: . . . and my name's Jillian, if you need me.

Me: What's your name if we don't need you?

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/wdn
πŸ“…︎ Jul 15 2015
🚨︎ report

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