Spoonerism users...

...are teople poo.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/vbloke
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2020
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Kiddy Dong Racing is the perfect example of a Spoonerism

Spoonerism: a verbal error in which a speaker accidentally transposes the initial sounds or letters of two or more words, often to humorous effect.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Moshiie
πŸ“…︎ Oct 04 2019
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David Hasselhoff walked into a bar and ordered a drink.

β€œIt’s a pleasure to serve you, Mr. Hasselhoff”, said the bartender.

β€œJust call me Hoff”, he replied.

β€œSure”, said the bartender, β€œno hassle”.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MGreenMN
πŸ“…︎ Aug 01 2020
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The Rev. Spooner got the world Poker champion in to tend his vegetable plants.

He was told to 'Weed 'em and reap'

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheAnagramancer
πŸ“…︎ Oct 01 2019
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Felt clute? C'mon
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Papatheredeemer
πŸ“…︎ May 14 2019
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What's the difference between a restriction and a line of people waiting to stroke my cat?

One's a curfew

The other's a fur queue

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ Jul 31 2018
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Any time I do something halfway intelligent, my dad says…

"Wow, you're a fart smella...I mean smart fella!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20 2017
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how to titillate an ocelot
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πŸ‘€︎ u/queengemini
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2015
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The time my Dad went above and beyond the call of duty, at a formal dinner party

Picture this.

A fancy Christmas dinner party at his new wife's opulent, sandstone estate house. Plates are being cleared from the lengthy, mahogony table that seats the fourteen well-to-do guests, the main course having just finished. All have feasted gloriously on our Christmas fare.

My Dad, playing the good host, picks up two bottles of wine, one white and one red, and proceeds to do a round of the table, chatting amiably with everyone as he circles. Those whose glasses are less than 90% full, he proceeds to top-up. I am sitting in the very centre of the long table, seated directly opposite a very well off lady in her early sixties, by the name of Margaret. My dad, having just topped off my glass, is now standing directly behind me.

This older woman, full of grace and charm, looks to my Dad and says, "Thank you so much for this glorious meal, John. It's been simply divine."

My Dad, "Not at all, Margaret, not at all. Could I charge your glass?"

Margaret, "Oh, no no, thank you. I've got the bottle in front of me!"

My Dad, quick of wit, and with a sneaky - yet charming - grin on his face, responds, "Ah, well, better that than a frontal lobotomy!"

I've never been more proud of him.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/rolloxan
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2013
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