Ripleys Pun
πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Jaffatank
πŸ“…︎ Apr 28 2017
🚨︎ report
I had a recurring nightmare that I was fighting Jason Bourne, Will Hunting, and Tom Ripley, but now I’m ok.

I finally battled my Damons.

πŸ‘︎ 35
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2019
🚨︎ report
My 9yr old came up with: How do you greet someone who is laughing quietly?

With β€˜a low ha’ (aloha)!

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/feartoad
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22 2020
🚨︎ report
If Jack has three balls and Michael has two. How many balls do they have in total?

5, but Jack should probably go see an urologist.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/redpandarox
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2019
🚨︎ report
Book vs the Movie

My daughter read the book "The Talented Mr. Ripley" in her English class. Then we watched the movie starring Matt Damon and Jude Law (who plays Dickie). My daughter kept telling me what's different in the movie compared to the book..like Dickie is a painter not a musician, etc. After she telling me a bunch of differences, I asked "In the book, does Jude Law play Dickie?"

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thewhiskey
πŸ“…︎ Apr 04 2017
🚨︎ report
Alien Dadjoke

"They just found an early draft to the film Alien.

Ash: I can't find the milk, Ellen.

Ripley: In space no-one can. Here, use cream."

Classic midnight text from dad.

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Mezolithic
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2013
🚨︎ report
Talking with my dad about skiing in college...

While speaking with my dad about time he spent in college.

Me: "So what did you do in college? Sit around and drink beer?"

Dad: "We had a local ski hill that we could use."

Me: "So you skied a lot then?"

Dad: "No, ya see the ski hill faced south and always had the sun shining on it. Mt. Ripley didn't have a lot of snow, believe it or not!"

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Baseplate23
πŸ“…︎ Mar 27 2016
🚨︎ report
I told my therapist that I have a recurring dream where I’m fighting Jason Bourne, Will Hunting, and Tom Ripley.

She said, β€œFinally! You are battling your Damons.”

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 27 2019
🚨︎ report
I told my therapist that I dream every night of fighting Jason Bourne and Mr. Ripley.

She said, β€œIt’s ok. You are just battling your Damons.”

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Feb 15 2019
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.