It would be shocking if this isn't a repost but I could not resist
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︎ Mar 08 2021
A father that couldn't resist.
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︎ Apr 11 2021
I had a kernel of energy left so I created something amaizeing and ear-resistable.
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︎ Mar 28 2021
A new variant of head lice has appeared and they are resistant to conventional treatments.
This has left scientists scratching their heads l
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︎ Mar 13 2021
I caught my son chewing on an electrical cord...
so I had to ground him.
He's doing better currently.
And conducting himself properly.
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︎ Apr 19 2021
What a brand name. Could not resist.
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︎ Nov 24 2020
What do you call a dinosaur who is easy to clean, heat resistant and long lasting?
py-rex
I'll get my coat...
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︎ Oct 26 2020
I've met this french business woman recently. She was so beautiful and so wealthy, I just couldn't resist her and her lovely
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︎ Jan 20 2021
Sons.....
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︎ Feb 08 2021
Impossible to resist
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︎ Sep 08 2020
I think joule really likes this joke
π︎ 6k
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︎ Jan 13 2021
I couldn't resist the sexy TV remote
It was an instant turn on
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︎ Jan 14 2021
Can't resist, the pan is searing hot.
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︎ Sep 20 2020
Why couldn't Gavin resist eating the candy?
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︎ Nov 12 2020
And children that is how Watt was invented
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︎ Mar 16 2021
I came up with the top ten reasons you shouldn't pee on an electric fence...
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︎ Mar 18 2021
If electricity always follows the path of least resistance,
Why doesn't lighting always strike in France?
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︎ Sep 14 2020
Resistance is futile.
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︎ Jun 06 2019
I just couldnβt resist!!
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︎ May 13 2020
if your kid is refusing to take a nap
does that mean that they are resisting a rest
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︎ May 20 2021
Shocking meme!
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︎ Oct 27 2020
The Killer Ohms are attacking us!
WE MUST MAKE A RESISTANCE!
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︎ Mar 20 2021
What was the child who wouldnβt nap guilty of?
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︎ Apr 19 2021
My friends wife says she can't resist me.
I guess that makes me an ohm wrecker
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︎ May 27 2020
Right after being born, my newborn daughter wouldn't "latch" for her first feeding. So after 27-plus hours of labor and four hours of pushing, I looked at my poor, exhausted wife and said, "Looks like she's... resisting abreast."
My first official dad joke.
Edit: Thanks for the gold, kind stranger! Iβll be putting this in my little oneβs Reddit Scholarship Fund!
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︎ Jan 09 2019
What does the electrician say when he meditates?
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︎ Dec 18 2020
Couldnβt resist
Friend texts me: Can you leave a key fir me under the mat?
Me: Maple I will, Maple I wonβt.
Friend: ?
Me: Pine, Iβll leave a key
Friend: oh, my typo, haha
Me: Iβve got a bunch more Buckeye will wait til later to tell you.
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︎ Aug 10 2020
Anybody else find it hard to resist saying βfish dicksβ when cooking your kids fish sticks?
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︎ Jul 11 2020
Why did the CPU head up half an orchestra?
Because it's a semiconductor.
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︎ Mar 23 2021
How does someone become a conductor?
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︎ Jan 21 2021
I have a personal trainer and him and I do a lot of resistance training
He tells me to lift something and I say no
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︎ Jul 12 2020
Did you hear about the serfs who rebelled against their lord?
Their resistance was feudal.
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︎ Apr 17 2021
If something were heat resistant...
Would you say it's heat proof, to a certain degree?
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︎ Apr 08 2020
Couldn't resist posting it.
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︎ May 09 2019
Not a dad, but I have a good one
kid: RERErRErerErRerererererEreRerrerereRrErrrErEre!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?
Dad: Calm down! My ears hertz!!!
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︎ Jan 14 2021
Why did the police officer put the cranky baby in jail?
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︎ Apr 01 2021
I'm sorry, I just couldn't resist
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︎ Apr 25 2019
What do you call a man in the resistance army?
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︎ Mar 18 2020
A new strain of head lice is going around which is resistant to conventional treatments.
That has left scientists scratching their heads.
π︎ 13k
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︎ Aug 31 2020
A new strain of lice is going around that is resistant to conventional treatments.
That has left scientists scratching their heads.
π︎ 8k
π
︎ Oct 19 2019
A new strain of head lice is going around which is resistant to conventional treatments
That has left scientists scratching their heads
π︎ 8
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︎ Sep 18 2020
A new strain of head lice is going around which is resistant to conventional treatments
It has left scientists scratching their heads.
π︎ 10
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︎ Sep 02 2020
I caught my son chewing on electrical cords.
So I had to ground him. Heβs doing better currently, and now conducting himself properly.
π︎ 19k
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︎ Aug 08 2020
My son kept chewing on all the electrical chords we had set up for the holidays, so I grounded him...
He's doing better currently and conducting himself properly...
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︎ Jan 15 2021
If a child refuses to sleep during nap time, are they guilty of resisting a rest?
π︎ 17k
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︎ Nov 09 2017
If a child refuses to sleep during nap time, are they guilty of resisting a rest?
π︎ 156
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︎ Nov 15 2019
If a child refuses to take a nap
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︎ Mar 13 2021
If a child refuses to sleep during nap time, does that mean they're guilty of resisting a rest?
π︎ 120
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︎ Sep 30 2019
If a child refuses to sleep during nap time, are they guilty of resisting a rest?
π︎ 100
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︎ Oct 30 2019
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