I’ve asked so many people what LGBTQ stands for

So far no one has given me a straight answer

πŸ‘︎ 13k
πŸ‘€︎ u/John87Nintendo
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2020
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I got arrested for dumping ice under the overpass last night. I thought they would have let me go this morning.

Surely it's just water under the bridge by now?

πŸ‘︎ 102
πŸ‘€︎ u/midget_clown
πŸ“…︎ Sep 20 2020
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What is lbgtq?

When I ask I can never get a straight answer.

πŸ‘︎ 7k
πŸ‘€︎ u/Bluelemons111
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2019
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Why did pilots use to have such a hard time flying straight?

All they had was biplanes

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ‘€︎ u/HeyArnoldPalmer2
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2020
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I remember asking my dad repeatedly what the acronym LGBTQ meant.

I never got a straight answer.

πŸ‘︎ 16k
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 14 2019
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They say one in four people are homosexual, which is weird because I have three best friends, all guys. Makes me wonder which one of us would be gay.

I hope It's Paul. He's cute.

πŸ‘︎ 10k
πŸ‘€︎ u/ENJOYblet
πŸ“…︎ Dec 24 2018
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Can arthritis make you queer?

Well, it did make Ben Gay...

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2016
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I asked what LGBTQ meant..

I couldn’t get a straight answer.

πŸ‘︎ 104
πŸ‘€︎ u/Ustydud
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2019
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Weird flex but oh gay
πŸ‘︎ 76
πŸ‘€︎ u/LivingMemeL0rd69
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2019
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I didn't know test tubes were this colourful.
πŸ‘︎ 470
πŸ‘€︎ u/dz959
πŸ“…︎ Sep 03 2018
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I want to open up an ophthalmologist office for homosexuals. I’ll call it, β€œThe Gaze”
πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ‘€︎ u/Dancer9d9
πŸ“…︎ Oct 02 2019
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Realistically and Potentially . . .

A young boy went up to his father and asked him, 'Dad, what is the difference between potentially and realistically?' The father thought for a moment, then answered, 'Go ask your mother if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars. Then ask your sister if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a Million dollars, and then ask your brother if he'd sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars. Come back and tell me what you learn from that.' So the boy went to his mother and asked, 'Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?' The mother replied, 'Of course I would! We could really use that money to fix up the house and send you kids to a great University!' The boy then went to his sister and asked, 'Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?' The girl replied, 'Oh my Gawd! I LOVE Brad Pitt - I would sleep with him in a heartbeat, are you nuts?' The boy then went to his brother and asked, 'Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?' 'Of course,' the brother replied. 'Do you know what a million Bucks would buy?' The boy pondered the answers for a few days and then went back to his dad. His father asked him, 'Did you find out the difference between 'potentially' and 'realistically'?' The boy replied, 'Yes, 'Potentially', you and I are sitting on Three million dollars . But 'realistically', we're just living with two hookers and a queer.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06 2019
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I went to a pride parade today.
πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ‘€︎ u/whatsyourassword
πŸ“…︎ Jun 25 2018
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A man introduced himself by saying "I'm gay"

I thought it was a queer way to say hello

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ‘€︎ u/Swaggerkid_2005
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2018
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I got my daughter so good today I stunned her into silence

My daughter comes home from school and plops down in the chair in front of me hands in her hair

Daughter: My Homework is SOO gay

Me: I'm glad to hear that it's LGTBY friendly

She gives me a blank stare with a few blinks for about 10 seconds

Daughter: What!? Dad.. NO! It's not that! I mean it's... Just... no!

Me: Oh! so it's happy then! I'm glad your homework had a great day at school!

My daughter exhales sharply

Daughter: Sure dad, it's Happiest homework ever!

πŸ‘︎ 123
πŸ‘€︎ u/obievil
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2014
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Dad joked while cleaning out the basement:

My brother and I were helping my dad clean out the basement when my brother found an interesting extension cord.

Brother: "Hey, this extension cord has two male ends!" Dad: "Huh, well that's queer."

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ‘€︎ u/SalivatingMoron
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2014
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