Pummeling Puns

“Help, I’ve been assaulted!”

“My goodness” says the officer at the front desk “What happened?”

“Well he kept pummelling me with his fists, then he threw some bread at me” said the man, obviously distraught.

“Hmmm” replies the officer “Sounds to me like you got a roll with the punches”.

We were staying in a hotel room that had a balcony door that didn’t fully close which causes a lot of city noise to come in.

It’s the morning and we are still in bed when she says, “I can’t stand this room!”

I reply, “Well, it’s a good thing you’re lying down!”

I was then pummeled with pillows.