I found pictures of Mt. Rushmore before it was carved

Its natural beauty was unpresidented

πŸ‘︎ 5k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/shiva8512
πŸ“…︎ Mar 07 2021
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A policeman was interrogating 3 guys who were training to become detectives. To test their skills in recognizing a suspect, he shows the first guys a picture for 5 seconds and then hides it. "This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?"

The first guy answers, "That's easy, we'll catch him fast because he only has one eye!"

The policeman says, "Well...uh...that's because the picture I showed is his side profile."

Slightly flustered by this ridiculous response, he flashes the picture for 5 seconds at the second guy and asks him, "This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?"

The second guy smiles, flips his hair and says, "Ha! He'd be too easy to catch because he only has one ear!"

The policeman angrily responds, "What's the matter with you two?!!? Of course only one eye and one ear are showing because it's a picture of his side profile! Is that the best answer you can come up with?"

Extremely frustrated at this point, he shows the picture to the third guy and in a very testy voice asks, "This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?

He quickly adds, "Think hard before giving me a stupid answer."

The third guy looks at the picture intently for a moment and says, "The suspect wears contact lenses."

The policeman is surprised and speechless because he really doesn't know himself if the suspect wears contacts or not.

"Well, that's an interesting answer. Wait here for a few minutes while I check his file and I'll get back to you on that."

He leaves the room and goes to his office, checks the suspect's file on his computer and comes back with a beaming smile on his face.

"Wow! I can't believe it. It's TRUE! The suspect does, in fact, wear contact lenses. Good work! How were you able to make such an astute observation?"

"That's easy..." the third guy replied. "He can't wear regular glasses because he only has one eye and one ear."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
πŸ“…︎ Mar 12 2021
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I recently bought my only Daughter a locket with her picture inside, for her 18th birthday.

.. just so glad She's now finally independent.

πŸ‘︎ 555
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HugoZHackenbush2
πŸ“…︎ Mar 03 2021
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I got a $1000 fine for taking a picture of myself.

It was an expensive self fee.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/buckeyespud
πŸ“…︎ Apr 07 2021
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Pictures you can hear.
πŸ‘︎ 53
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kks_fatboy
πŸ“…︎ Mar 27 2021
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Just started my new job as a security guard. The supervisor told me my job would be to watch the office at night.

I’m on season eight. Still not sure what this has to do with security.

πŸ‘︎ 10k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FoldaHolda
πŸ“…︎ Apr 11 2021
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I tried googling tips to stop procrastinating but I ended up reading about photography

Turns out I can’t focus!

πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ“…︎ Apr 18 2021
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I have a picture with me standing and solar panels in the background. Please suggest something punny.
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πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2021
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I drew a picture of a black hole. It sucked.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CatsCreepMeowt
πŸ“…︎ Mar 21 2021
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Taking a picture of big foot is no small feat.

Feat sounds like feet.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/4zio
πŸ“…︎ Mar 05 2021
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what did the school staff do when a student wore a shirt with a picture of a robber?

they bandit

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Spycrabpuppet123
πŸ“…︎ Mar 16 2021
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My teacher likes to start every day by reading a joke from Reddit. She was sick the other day, so

A subreddit.

πŸ‘︎ 14k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Such-Fig-3879
πŸ“…︎ Mar 12 2021
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Went out and took pictures of wheat, oats, rice, and corn...

Unfortunately, they all came out pretty grainy. One of them you could barley make out.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/frudedude
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2021
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Not mine. But always makes me giggle
πŸ‘︎ 8k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Alca87
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2021
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Trying to figure out which picture is better of my son.

I have one without a filter and one with a filter https://imgur.com/BCc6kx4.jpg

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kornykory
πŸ“…︎ Feb 10 2021
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I'm going to make a website that is just videos and pictures of trains and trolleys.

OnlyTrams

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sweaner
πŸ“…︎ Mar 31 2021
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I took a picture of a satellite
πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/j-ke_t
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2021
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What do you call a nude artist who keeps drawing butt picture?

A crack addict.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/nhansieu1
πŸ“…︎ Mar 09 2021
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My Dad showed me a picture of him at a REM concert "Look" he said.

That's me in the corner...

EDIT. Sorry that was just a dream

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πŸ‘€︎ u/akjohnston87
πŸ“…︎ Feb 10 2021
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Wife took a picture of Doctor Hoo
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kingferret53
πŸ“…︎ Jan 12 2021
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I saw a picture of a dog that had four prosthetic legs.

He has faux paws.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mr_PoodlePants
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2021
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This is a picture
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πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2021
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β€ͺWhy can’t 2021 take a picture in the dark

because it doesn’t have flash

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ZETA_RETICULI_
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2021
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My wife's an artist so I tried to impress her by painting her picture but she just got really upset

I guess she liked how it looked originally.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/lineworksboston
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08 2021
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Picture Perfect Puns

Ancient Scot Richard's Warriors: Dick's Picts

Loki - Trick pics (from my brother)

Pictures of an Adam Sandler movie: "Click" pics.

Pictures of a Kaitlin Olson character: The Mick's pics

Screenahots of these comments: Wit pics

Leaky faucet: drip pics

X1 Cumberbatch photos: Benedict pics

X2 Pope photos: Benedict pics (also works)

X3 Turncoat snaps: Benedict pics

X4 "Wong" image: Benedict pics

Legal command: Writ pics

Pictures of twigs: Stick pics

A Christmas Story scene: lick pics

Pictures of a Winter Saint: Nick pics

Syringe photos: prick pics (from a friend)

Sporting goods store images: Dick's pics.

Dan Harmon cartoon character: Rick's pics.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AndySkibba
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2021
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What the fuck has happened to this sub!?

http://m.imgur.com/ImM3RWz

πŸ‘︎ 418
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πŸ“…︎ Mar 29 2021
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I caught my daughter taking pictures of her feet. I asked her why.

β€œI needed better camera footage.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rlchv70
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28 2021
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Barack Obama went to a costume party giving his wife a piggyback. Someone asks what he is and says "I'm a snail!"

"That's M'Shell on my back!"

πŸ‘︎ 11k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Chainsmoker88
πŸ“…︎ Jan 25 2021
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True story: I sent my dad a picture of the loaf of bread I made witha bread machine. He instantly responded with :

I knead one of those!!

πŸ‘︎ 30
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LagartoDorado
πŸ“…︎ Jan 25 2021
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If you want to make easy money, just take pictures of salmon dressed in human clothes.

It’s like shooting fish in apparel.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jan 29 2021
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After I was arrested, my ex-wife decided to hang a picture of my mugshot on the wall in her living room.

But she still won't admit she framed me.

πŸ‘︎ 14k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DestroyatronMk8
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02 2020
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Egg puns!
πŸ‘︎ 3k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/69_BABATUNDE_
πŸ“…︎ Jan 26 2021
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Today, I checked out at the store, but the cashier kept taking pictures of herself with each item I was purchasing...

I'll never go thru the selfie checkout again!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05 2021
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I put a picture of myself in a locket...

You could say, I'm Independent.

πŸ‘︎ 104
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2020
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I took a picture of my son sleeping earlier today.

Then I sent the picture to the FBI as evidence of a kid napping.

πŸ‘︎ 53
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Perrin42
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2020
🚨︎ report
Picture this: A pandemic is unleashed by ticks that live on and around the mouths of alpacas.

Global chaos ensues.

The disease wipes out 99% of humanity, and the desperate survivors are forced to live in a post-alpaca lip tick wasteland.

πŸ‘︎ 14k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/habsfan1112
πŸ“…︎ May 01 2020
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I have a friend who tried to take a selfie in the shower, but the image was too blurry.

He has selfie steam issues.

πŸ‘︎ 5k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/korabdrg
πŸ“…︎ Jan 23 2021
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So touching
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Norwegian_Stick
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03 2021
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this pun fills me with gelt
πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/junkyardjohnwest
πŸ“…︎ Mar 29 2021
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What did the pin hole camera say when the SLR camera asked about it's aperature and exposure time when taking a picture?

Do I shutter?

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ“…︎ Jan 30 2021
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I asked my wife about a ballerina in a picture who looked familiar. She said it was Anna Pavlova.

I said I thought her face rang a bell.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/M4sterofD1saster
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2020
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Why are there so few pictures of the 16th President?

Because he was always a blinkin'

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mikethelabguy
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2020
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My wife emailed me pictures of our wedding, but I couldn’t open any of the files.

I always have trouble with emotional attachments.

πŸ‘︎ 119
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2020
🚨︎ report
I bought my daughter a locket and put her picture in it.

Now she is independant.

πŸ‘︎ 85
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πŸ‘€︎ u/poshnoshlosh
πŸ“…︎ Apr 04 2021
🚨︎ report
My friend is making a lot of easy money by taking pictures of salmon dressed in human clothes.

It’s like shooting fish in apparel.

πŸ‘︎ 11k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jun 21 2020
🚨︎ report
My friend hit it big taking pictures of salmon in human clothes.

He said it was like shooting fish in apparel.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MagicGuy66
πŸ“…︎ Jan 21 2021
🚨︎ report
If you put a picture of yourself in a locket...

You could say you’re independent.

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/gmahoney1976
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2021
🚨︎ report

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